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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23485762">Outed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmen_sandyeggo/pseuds/carmen_sandyeggo'>carmen_sandyeggo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stranger Things (TV 2016)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Closeted Billy Hargrove, Closure, Confessions, Domestic Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Epilogue, Established Relationship, Familial Fall Out, Firsts, Fluffy Smut, Gay Billy Hargrove, Happy Ending, Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Outing, Past Child Abuse, Questioning, Season 3 Didn't Happen, Sexual Content, Slow Burn, Sneaking Around</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 08:41:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>51,251</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23485762</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmen_sandyeggo/pseuds/carmen_sandyeggo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cat's out of the bag now. Billy's heart pounds in chest as he stands in Neil's way, protecting Steve who lays half naked on his bed. There was no way in hell he was going to get them out of this. With the look on Neil's face, it's obvious to him of what they were doing just now.  After everything, Billy's been discovered by the one person he didn't want to ever be found out by, and in the worst way possible.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>315</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>What was gonna be a short one shot turned into a 35K and growing full on multi-chapter slight Billy analysis fic.</p><p>Please proceed with tag caution and Enjoy.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">It first started when Billy pulled up to his sister's middle school, waiting for her stupid dance to be over so he could take her home. After what happened last month, it's been Billy's responsibility to drive his stepsister everywhere to avoid losing sight of her again. Call it punishment or character building, it was annoying being a personal chauffeur to a 13-year-old. When he steps outside of his car to smoke and stretch his legs, that's when he sees him - Steve Harrington, leaning against his Beemer with his arms crossed tightly across his chest. Billy debates for a second to go over to him. He's pretty sure Harrington doesn't want him anywhere near him after their fight last month. Compared to Harrington, Billy hardly had any cuts or bruises resulting from it. He knows now, like he knew then, that he'd gone too far and done too much. And that’s enough of a reason for Billy to walk over.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Lookin' a lil' cold there Harrington," Billy calls out with his unlit cigarette between his lips. He snickers at the way Steve rolls his eyes and sits up a little straighter against his car. He stops a few feet away from his classmate to light up and take a drag, exhaling a cloud of smoke into the distance between them. "Mind if I join you?"</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve is a little confused, but he doesn't show it, "Be my guest," he answers neutrally. He's not sure what prompted Hargrove to come over but, what the hell right? Billy joins beside him, gently leaning on his car, "Here to pick up Max?" He asks.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy nods, taking another drag, "You?" He asks, smoke leaving him.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Dustin." Steve answers short. Billy takes his pack out of his jacket and pops a stick from it, offering it to Steve. Steve hesitates for a moment because, wow this is fucking weird. "Thanks..." He carefully plucks the cigarette from Billy's fingers and is immediately serviced with a lighter. He leans in for a moment for the cigarette to catch light and pulls away before burning out. He's already starting to feel warm and nods in thanks, and Billy smiles. This was the thing about guys - you can hate each other's guts, but in the end, they move the fuck on.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It's quiet for all of a minute before Steve starts to feel awkward. And when he starts to feel awkward, he starts to make small talk. But before he can even do that, Billy breaks the silence first. "Y'know," he starts off, licking his lips and sniffling a bit from the chilly air, "I never thanked you for taking care of Max that night." Steve looks at him, hand paused in front of his face with his cigarette between his fingers. Billy doesn't look at him. Instead he's looking down over at that cop Hopper and the Byers kid's mom doing the same things as what they're doing. "Whatever the fuck happened that night, at least she was in good hands."</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve watches Billy look down to flick the ash off before taking a long drag. Did that...just happen? Billy Hargrove, <em>thanking</em> him for watching out for his kid sister? "...Yeah...yeah no problem." Is all Steve can manage to say, slowly bringing the butt end to his lips and pulling in tobacco. He turns his attention to the wet pavement in front of him, not knowing where else to look or what else to say or do aside from smoking his peace offering.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy looks over just enough to steal a glance at Harrington. There wasn't a sign on his face that indicated he was still healing from their fight. Looking away, Billy now feels awkward and nervous. Last thing he wanted was to make small talk but, "Looks like that pretty lil' face of yours is all better." He blurts out. He takes a quick nervous puff of his cigarette as if it would make his comment casual.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Looking back at Billy, it's Steve's turn to smile. He snorts a bit, "That some weird form of an apology? Or flattery?" He smiles broader and chuckles some when Billy looks up to glare at him, annoyed that as if Steve had taken the opportunity to actually apologize from him. Billy rolls his eyes, finishing his cigarette and flicking it over to the car parked behind Steve's. He pulls another one out from his jacket, trying to get his lighter to work against the cold.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Here," Steve digs his old lighter from his front pocket, lighting it up instantly and bringing it to Billy, who leans in. Taking a calming drag, Billy nods in thanks, to which Steve acknowledges silently with a tight smile.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Love it when my bitches light my cigarettes," Billy teases. His comment annoys Steve to all hell as he scoffs as he taps the ash off.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Oh what, so, you're my bitch for lighting mine?" Steve asks, trying to throw Billy, to which he shakes his head.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"No," he answers, "just means I love lighting my bitch's cigarettes." He breaks out into a smile and light laughter when Steve playfully shoves him away, absolutely done with his shit.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">By this time, kids start pouring out from the school gymnasium. Some gather around along the side of the entryway to wait for their parents while others walk straight to a car after scanning the area to find their ride. Billy looks out for his redhead, who he expects them to be with their nerdy "party", as they referred to themselves. Spotting them, Billy straightens up hoping that Max would see him from where she is. When she does, she says good-bye to everyone, smiling at Lucas shyly before stepping off with Henderson walking along with her in the same direction after taking notice Steve was there too with Billy. Pushing off the Beemer, Billy drops his cigarette, putting it out with the underside of his boot, "Thanks for the company." He gives that cocky smile with the tip of his tongue edging the top row of his teeth before walking away back to his Camaro.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The tone Billy uses sends a shiver down Steve's spine. It's that same tone Billy uses when trying to pick up one of the girls at school, flirty and charming. Steve would know - he's used a similar tone before for the same reasons. "Yeah." Steve says to more to himself than out loud for Hargrove to hear as he watches him walk back to his Camaro a few cars down the row.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Saying goodnight to Max, Dustin walks up to Steve with a look of confusion screwed on his face. "The hell was that all about?" He asks Steve, who's still watching Billy walk to his car where Max waits for Billy to hurry up and unlock the door. Dustin notices this, looking at what Steve has his attention fixed on, then looks back at the older teen. "Uh hellooooo? Earth to Steve?" He says loudly with the wave of his hand, in an effort to claim his attention.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"What?" Steve asks in a distant, distracted tone, continuing to stare at Billy.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Snap out of it!" Dustin shrieks, smacking Steve on his arm with an open palm.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Ow!" Steve flinches from the pain, "What the hell, man?" He hits back, which only makes him slap his hands frantically at Dustin who won’t stop touching him.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"That's my question!” Dustin says with a final flick to Steve’s cheek. “What the hell were you and Hargrove talking about that has you acting all…weird?" Dustin demands to know, still riled up from being ignored.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"It's nothin' alright?" Steve dismisses as he makes his way around the car to the driver’s side, "Now will you drop it so we can get outta here before I make you walk home." He emptily threatens.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"You wouldn't." Dustin challenges with a confident smirk. Steve rolls his eyes and rips the driver's door open to get out of the cold. Turning over the engine, the heater blasts air into the cabin and the foggy windshield. Buckling in, Steve looks up in the rear-view mirror to see Billy pulling his Camaro away from the curb, heading toward his direction. He pulls up beside Steve's car with his window down, so Steve puts Dustin's down too.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"What the hell, Steve." Dustin indignantly protests.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Shh."</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"You're letting the heat out!"</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Just shut up!"</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy, with that irritating smirk stretched across his lips, looks past Dustin to Steve, "See you in the New Year Harrington."</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">"Yeah uh," Steve doesn't know what to say, "you too."</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Dustin and Max narrow their eyes, exchanging puzzled looks with one another by this weird conversation between their teen drivers.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy gives a soft chuckle before driving off again, waving Steve goodbye with a two-finger salute. And again, Steve's eyes follow him until he loses sights of the car. Coming back to his senses, he resumes getting situated in his seat before noticing that his passenger is gawking at him. "What?" Steve asks weirded out that Dustin was looking at him with his mouth open and wry expression. "Don't gimme that look." Steve grouses, throwing the car in drive.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Since the kid’s Snow Ball, Steve and Billy began running into each other more frequently in the senior parking lot. They exchanged head nods of "Hello’s” and provided each other distant company when ditching class in favor for a smoke. Billy stopped acting like a dick with pushing Steve around on the court during basketball practice. Instead he was giving him sarcastic pointers and correcting his defensive positions. But he didn't stop his trash talk to get Harrington flustered. Their mild banter lifted the tension off the rest of the team. They were no longer on edge about an impending fight about to break out between their best players. Billy thought his civility with Steve would end there.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But it doesn’t.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Whenever Billy’s caught the slightest glimpse of Steve at school, his attention would immediately follow him. It was like a radar went off in his head letting him know <em>he </em>was around. His gaze would follow Harrington long enough to get his fill then go back to whatever he was doing. Billy couldn’t make it too obvious with the crowd he was hanging around or give himself away to Steve if he got caught staring. Or anyone else for that matter. Billy starts to notice how easily he gets distracted when he sees Steve in the halls. He could be talking to any of the number of girls Billy has wrapped around his finger, flirting it up and being charming as always, and all it would take to break his concentration would be Steve fucking Harrington. Looking just past the girl, Billy would watch Steve and what he was doing. He’d have to use what little strength he had to focus and return his mostly undivided attention to his next potential hook-up. But when Steve would walk past him, Billy couldn’t help but give him a quick look up and down, giving his best stare down to conceal his true intentions.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Luckily for Billy, these circumstances fed into the ‘now-friendly’ rivalry between him and Harrington.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>However, Billy knew better.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>If Billy was really being honest with himself, Harrington – unbeknownst to the beautiful bastard for being so blissfully ignorant – had Billy’s eye the moment he saw him at the Halloween party. He’d heard about him from the others as soon as he gained popularity of being the new kid from California. “King Steve” was a pretty boy with creamy pale skin decorated in beauty marks, plump pink lips, impossibly soft wavy long hair with big brown eyes, and captain of the basketball team. This was the same kid who was apparently in some classes with him but never bothered to show up in those few days since his arrival. What's not there to like? He’d heard Harrington wasn't the brightest bulb in the tanning bed but, he was cute.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And Billy liked cute.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>So when he saw him for the first time, repressed emotions Neil had attempted to beat out of him long ago resurfaced. In the depths of his mind, Billy knew why his attention focused on Steve. Despite what image Billy projected to others, his persona of being a hyper masculine womanizer was all but a charade to keep Neil off his ass. Billy wanted - <em><span>needed</span></em> - to know what would take to make the famous King Steve smile, or maybe even blush from his charms.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As much as he tried to dismiss the voice of Neil’s criticisms growling in his subconscious judging as he watches every move, or fought the recollections of Neil’s ruthlessness, he <em>knew </em>why he was acting this way. He knew just as well as why he <em>couldn’t. Shouldn’t</em>. When the image Neil tried to imprint on Billy finally clicked, Billy threw himself into this façade of Neil’s expectations to survive rather than abolish who he truly was.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Neil's definition of what being a "man" was to dominate the room wherever you were. Any unsavory or misbehavior Billy got caught up in Neil excused it as "boys being boys" – in other words, looked over and excused, therefore forgotten. <em>Especially</em> if it meant that Billy didn't act like a pussy. Drinking, smoking, getting into fights, or bringing home girls, any reckless behavior was granted permission in an effort to making Billy into a "man". Or as Neil once put, <em><span>"Whatever it takes to make sure you’re not like the fag you're so bent on becoming."</span></em></span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But the more Billy fed into the lie of his so called “image”, the angrier he became with himself; hating who he was forced to be. This pseudo self-preservation was suffocating him, submitting him into silence where what he said and thought did not matter under Neil’s authoritarian reign. Instead of going about his attraction like a normal person would with kind smiles and subtle hints of attraction, or simply <em>ignoring</em> it like he did with everything else, he shunned himself for it by projecting his self-loathing and denial out on the Senior with taunts, smart remarks, and aggressive flirting.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And where did that lead him? With his violent tendencies resulting into an inevitable series of fists colliding against Harrington’s face. All the anger and hatred which boiled deeply within Billy transformed into this overflow of viscid turmoil that he didn’t know what to do with. And it found Billy’s impulse to subdue Steve to his ruthless <em>cruelty.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Months after their altercation, the teen realizes he’d <em>been</em> taking his demons out on his kid sister before they moved to Hawkins. And Max – she…she didn’t <em>really</em> know what was going on about anything or why. Thinking back on it now, the alternative he found to shift and place the blame on her was entirely un-fucking-fair. Their <em>entire situation</em> in their house was fucking unfair. And Billy was doing a great job in fucking everything up at every opportunity; until that night when he decided to extend an olive branch in the form of a cigarette and robbed apology.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When basketball season finally ends, Billy doesn't really have any reason to hang out with Tommy H. anymore. To be quite honest, him and his girlfriend Carol, and everyone else they invited became tiring to be around. Not to mention his, admittedly, growing obsession of Steve. Yeah okay, as much as he’s repeatedly told himself to not give in out of fear of Neil’s repercussions ultimately preventing Billy from crossing that line, Billy compromised with himself: maybe he could put the limit it at friendship. A platonic friendship. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy agonized over what it'd be like to actually hang out with Harrington since his ostracization from most of his Senior class. In his efforts to find out, Billy went beyond the head nods and greeted Steve in classes they had together with a sarcastic announcement of their King Steve gracing the class plebes with his presence. And when Billy wasn’t being dickish, he was given a look of uncertainty in return from the brunet and add a casual, “Well fuck you too, Harrington”, making him less unbecoming. Being stubborn to all Hell, Steve’s (lack of) responses didn’t discourage Billy.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>At first Steve didn’t talk all that much - maybe due to the fact it was Billy; a guy who beat Steve to a near fuckin’ pulp. Billy knew that just because he apologized to Steve who in not so many words sorta accepted it, didn’t mean Steve would forget what he did to him. This drove Billy. He wanted – no, <em><span>needed</span></em> to know what would take to make the famous King Steve smile, or maybe even blush from his undeniable charms. Gradually, they were capable of holding a half decent conversation despite how short the talks may have been. Whether it was talking shit about someone or talking about the Bulls, it took time, but Billy managed to get Harrington talking more, little by little. With <em>some</em> success, he found himself doing damn near <em>anything</em> to seize an opportunity to talk to the brunet. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As sweet and oblivious Steve was most of the time, Billy’s new behavior didn’t go unnoticed by the brunet.</span>
  
</p>

<p></p><div>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Most would say nothing was any different with the popular blond. But Steve was cautious as well as curious of Hargrove growing friendlier toward him as the weeks went by. And by friendly, he meant the way Hargrove wasn’t trying to actively piss him off or antagonize him in hopes of having some sort of his antics resulting into some sort of fight. Which was out of character for Billy; he was always looking for a brawl. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve thought there was the possibility Billy was getting bored of him; he did stop hanging out with Tommy from what Steve had heard. Steve could ask Max what her demented stepbrother was up to, but the chances of her knowing were probably slim to none, and her guess would be as good as his. And the last thing Steve needed was Max, or any of the other kids, harassing him with questions about Billy’s recent behavior (and that was to say if his behavior didn’t change at home)</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>At the same time though, it was nice to not have an immediate sense of dread hitting him like Mack truck whenever he saw the blond with the roll of his eyes followed by a heavy sigh to brace himself for a spar of disdainful words hurled at one another. Steve’s impression of him improved. He kinda found him a bit more attractive this way. Wait, attractive? No, no, that’s not what he meant. Ah shit what’s the word…approachable? Yeah, yeah, <em>approachable</em>. Likeable. Billy wasn’t that bad…</span>
  </p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When summer finally arrives, Billy realizes that Steve hadn’t talked about any of the Universities he applied to or working for his father’s company. He doesn’t out right ask or pry for details from others, but rather listens in to the not so hushed whispers when Steve Harrington is brought up in conversation. Not only did Steve not get into any of the schools he applied for, but apparently the poor kid couldn’t even get into a local trade school. With his not so stellar grades, it went to show that no matter how financially wealthy his family was, Steve was not going anywhere. Not even Daddy was letting him work alongside him. Billy couldn’t help but feel a small degree of secondhand embarrassment for Steve in knowing this.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy had unintentionally landed himself a lifeguard position when he took Max to the community pool. One of the guards coming off break asked him while he was tanning if he could swim and knew CPR and boom, Billy got himself a summer job. Now Neil can quit bitching at him about doing something with himself since he’s now graduated. He could “<em>contribute rather than freeload”</em>. In a rare mood, Billy calls out to Max who’s swimming laps to cool off.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Let’s go shit bird, we’re going to the mall.” He tells her. Confused but not missing a rare opportunity of Billy willingly bringing her along, Max hauls herself out of the pool and darts for the locker room to towel off and put her street clothes back on. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Unhurried, Billy dresses himself as he ignores his peripheral vision of the gawking of women nearby. When he does turn and faces them, he flashes his charming smile as he departs. By the time he approaches his car, he hears the fast footfalls of Max running who probably worried that she took too long and would be left behind. “What’re we doing at the mall?” She huffs as she throws her bag into the back seat.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I could go for hot dog on a stick,” Billy answers, looking up at her over the top of his sunglasses. “Or do you want Susan’s tuna casserole?” Max screws up her face in disgust and shakes her head. “Yeah didn’t think so.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The mall is busy as shit as always and the lines in the food court are long and the seats are practically overflowing with patrons; some who aren’t even eating but chatting with groups of friends. “Fuck me,” Billy groans. He looks over to where he wants to grab food for him and Max and tugs her along by her shoulder. By the time they reach the register, Billy’s persona comes to the front to rid the look of annoyance of the crowd. “We’ll have two hot dogs on a stick with fries, and two cherry lemonades.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I hate cherry.” Max comments.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy grits his teeth through his smile, “<em>One</em> cherry lemonade and…” he trails off for Max to finish.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Regular, lemonade.” Max corrects. The stepsiblings look at each other through side stares but don’t say anything to one another. Billy pays for the food and stands off to the side to wait for their order.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Go find us a spot where we can fucking sit down ‘n eat.” He sighs, already exhausted from the suffocating crowd and waiting in line. Max takes off and Billy follows her red hair to see where she ends up. He sees that she’s heading for someplace specific and ends up at Scoops Ahoy. “God damn it Maxine,” he grumbles to himself; <em>this isn’t a God damn spending spree</em>. But when she goes up to the counter, the chick at the register calls out for someone who seemed to be in the back and, “Holy shit…” Billy drawls out. It’s Steve Harrington in a fucking sailor outfit.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy is snapped out of his staring once he hears his order number called. He thanks the girl behind the counter with a wink and grabs the tray with the drinks and heads for the ice cream parlor. Not caring that he’s brought food into another place of business, he sets the tray down at an empty table and goes up to the counter. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t Harrington,” he says in that familiar teasing tone. He doesn’t even try <em>not</em> to smile. He’s hit the jackpot as far as he’s concerned. “Ahoy sailor.” He says with a vicious grin, ignoring the disgusted look on the other girl’s face. He <em>meant</em> for it to sound sleazy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s blood runs cold as fear strikes through him. Sure, his peers from his graduating class had seen him in his stupid uniform before. But Billy fucking Hargrove seeing him made the brunet feel exposed and vulnerable, ashamed even. To deflect, Steve rolls his eyes, knowing he’s in for some humiliation from the blond, “Yeah, yeah, yeah Hargrove, laugh it up. Let’s get this over with,” He says, rolling his wrist with the scooper in his hand. But Billy does something that no one would have ever expected.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Eyes casted down, Billy shrugs, “It’s part of the job, right?” He looks back up at Steve, “We all gotta look and feel dumb sometimes.” He empathizes with a genuine tone in his voice.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>His response makes Max keep her own expression to herself with her brows knitted together, completely baffled by what her shit head stepbrother had just said. Steve too is taken aback from this. What Billy had said was <em>mature</em>. Definitely not what he or Max was expecting. Robin on the other hand, who remained quiet during this exchange, has her brows raised; amazed by what she was witnessing before her. “Uh,” Steve finally manages to say, regaining his ability to speak, “th-thanks man.” Hargrove’s still staring at him, unwavering, and it’s making Steve buckle under this weird, undefinable pressure. He clears his throat, feeling everyone’s eyes on him, “I was just getting Max here a strawberry cone. You want anything?” He asks, trying to steer the attention away from himself and redirect it to extend his professionalism to his <em>customers</em>.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve fixes up Billy a hot fudge sundae with extra hot fudge while Robin rings up the orders. The moment the pair walk to their table, Robin nudges her co-worker, “Dude, what the hell was <em>that</em> all about?” She asks as quietly as her excitement and curiosity can manage. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Arm deep in the freezer, Steve turns to her for a second with his nose scrunched, “What’re you talking about, Rob?” He asks in return, scraping the vanilla ice cream to soften it for a sizeable scoop.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh hello, am I the only one who saw and heard what I saw and heard back there?” Robin juts her thumb over her shoulder, pointing at the California native kids at table six.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Still confused, Steve shrugs and shakes his head, “I dunno? What the hell did you see and hear that I didn’t?” Robin’s jaw drops in disbelief. The corners of her mouth curl up slightly and begins to giggle. “Fucking <em>what,</em> Robin? Am I missing something here?” Steve asks her, now growing annoyed with his co-worker.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With her smile remaining, Robin closes her mouth and raises her hands in surrender, “You know what, never mind. It’s nothing. Probably reading into wrong.” She can tell Steve isn’t buying in her bullshit with his uncertain demeanor. Robin finds Steve’s obliviousness hilarious. She saw how one of his many pseudo-children – what was her name? Max? – heard how uncharacteristic her brother sounded when talking to Harrington.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin remains quiet as she watched Steve walk up to the counter and call out Billy’s order for pick up. She continues to watch them as Billy walks up, eyes looking up and down her friend, that charming smile, and kind “thank you” before Billy returns to his table. But when Steve turns away, Billy looks back over his shoulder for a second look and notices Robin already watching him.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Now they’ve both been caught. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>There’s a moment of panic for both teens. For Robin: everything Steve had told her about Billy suddenly all made sense. Sure, she had agreed their interactions were weird as fuck at first but seeing it firsthand? Billy’s antics were beyond annoyance, but rather <em>efforts</em> based on an attraction to him. It was the most logical thing Robin concluded to. This also meant that Steve remained none too bright with the obvious. And as for Billy: someone not only caught him in a seemingly innocent act, but – from that wide-eyed look Robin had on her face – she realizes Billy is <em>into</em> Steve. In <em>that</em> way. With his secret found inadvertently out, Billy feels the immediate need to get defensive and make sure no one else finds out by word of mouth through Robin. But something catches Robin’s eye, Billy notices.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Her eyes drift down to Billy’s hand holding his dessert and sees a ring on Billy’s middle finger. It could only mean one thing for him if his worried look meant anything. In the short amount of time they hold this gaze, Robin crosses her arms, with her middle ring finger on display for Billy to see, and his response is immediate as the tense posture in his shoulders relax; because it can <em>only</em> mean one thing for her too. They’re both on the same team in terms of preference.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Now that he and Robin have something in common, probationary neutralism is established between them. In other words: Robin is extending her trust to Billy, who doesn’t need to worry about her outing him to Harrington, or anyone else for that matter. <em>Good thing I didn’t actually spell it out to him back there,</em> she thought to herself.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Apparently during this time, Steve’s been talking to her and calls her name to regain her attention, “Robin, hellooo? The hell are you lookin’ at?” Steve turns around to see Billy walking away. “What’d I miss?” he asks her, curious as to why her fixation was on Billy. And then, “Were – were you checking him out?” he asks in a low serious whisper. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She groans in frustration and humor as she turns around to grab the dry marker to add yet another tally under the “You Suck” column. While Steve yells as to why he’s earned yet another tally, Robins can hear Billy snickering into his sundae over what she’s done. Steve needed to figure out what Billy’s not so subtle hints meant. But Robin would be there to guide him when he’s at a complete loss.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s day off finally came. After working two straight weeks with Robin, their manager finally hired two more kids to sling ice cream at the mall part time. He had slept in for much needed (and deserved) sleep until noon. Steve could hear the buzzing of cicadas outside in the humid summer heat as he laid in bed staring up at the ceiling. He supposes he could go for a swim at the community pool. Yeah he has a pool of his own in the backyard however, with the house being as empty as it had been since May, Steve needed some human interaction that wasn’t customer or co-worker related to escape the loneliness in his own home.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve was able to tune out how loud and lively the local pool was of kids screaming, whistles blowing, splashes of cannon balls, and tanners yelling at being splashed by those jumping in the pool. He snagged the first available lounge chair he saw and put his towel down as he began to undress into appropriate swim attire. Sunscreen on his face, sunglasses, and in his trunks, Steve sighed as he laid back and closed his eyes to commence ultimate relaxation. Then suddenly an overcast shadowed his face. He scrunched his nose, “Where’d the sun go?” he murmurs to himself<br/></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Didn’t think I’d ever see you here, Harrington.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Ah shit.</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve cracks opens his eyes to find Billy standing over him, blocking the sun with his wide frame. Steve props himself up on his elbow and puts his sunglasses over his head to get a better look, “<em>You</em> work here now?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“ ‘Fraid so ‘migo,” Billy answers with the pop of his gum and irritating smirk. Billy’s thankful he has blacked out shades so he can look over Harrington like he had subtly done before in the locker room.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve scoffs and look down, shaking his head lightly, “Ooof course…” he drawls out in low tone, not surprised something like this <em>would</em> happen. He looks back up to ask how long Billy has had the job for but stops. Something <em>different</em>. Then he sees it, and without thinking he asks, “What happened to your-?” he stops short, pointing to his own eyebrow to mimic the fresh pink scar on Billy’s, to which Billy hardens up a bit.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“ ‘S nothin man.” Billy answers quickly.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve quirks a brow and sits upright this time to get a better look. The hairless diagonal line above his eye stood out visibly through the crisscross hairs in his eyebrow. Steve knows for a fact that wasn’t there before, or when he saw Hargrove at the parlor two weeks ago. He’d been up close in Billy’s shit on court to practically memorize this asshole’s face. “You get into another fight?” he asks.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy takes a half step back, “I said it’s nothing, Harrington.” Billy snaps, not meaning for it to come out as harsh as it did. But Harrington doesn’t flinch. He just looks back at him, unconvinced but shutting up anyway. “Look uh,” Billy clears his throat as he looks away from his small outburst, “I’ll see you around. Gotta go to my shift change.” He dismisses, nodding his head over to the tower where a girl, <em>Heather </em>Steve thinks, comes down from. With a wave, Billy walks away.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With his brows knitted together, Steve watches Billy go, perplexed as to when Hargrove had gotten that scar. He <em>knows</em> he’s not crazy, it’s not an old scar that he’s just taking notice now. And why did he get so defensive?</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>An unsettling feeling embeds deep in Steve’s better judgement. But unable to do much, Steve lets it go for now and pulls his shades back down over his eyes as lays back down. It’s not like he sees Billy often enough to be concerned. He listens the white noise of water splashing and kids screaming until it fades out as he drifts into a nap.</span>
</p>

<p></p><div>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Shit, shit, shit,” Steve mutters to himself. He dials another auto shop, hoping to get his car in this morning for an oil change. Jonathan didn’t come over yesterday to help him out, and according to Ms. Byers, he already headed out to work. When the mechanic informs him that they’re booked up until next week (like the other four he’s tried), Steve sighs, thanking the man on the end of the line. He had forty bucks to get the job done but what good was it if he couldn’t even get his car in? Thinking of literally everyone he knows he snatches his keys up and heads out to Cherry Road.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>He pulls to the four way stop in a hurry and the truck to his left waves him through. He waves his thanks and whips the car left and down the street, barely abiding by the speed limit down the narrow road. He’s scanning each house, trying to jog his memory of which house was Max’s. But then he sees the Camaro parked on the street. “Oh thank God,” Steve sighs. He parks behind Billy’s car and gets out in a hurry, slamming the door a little too hard. Oh well, time was of the essence, Steve needed to worry about one thing at a time and right now…</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve knocks on the door rapidly, hoping Billy was awake. Looking at his watch, it was pushing 9:30 in the morning. Steve had to be at work in two hours. When no one answers the door, Steve knocks harder and louder once more. Then suddenly – “Who the hell – Harrington?” </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy is standing there wearing a pair of basketball shorts sporting a high school logo Steve doesn’t recognize and a bed head of wild frizzy curls. And for a moment, Steve’s throat is caught in his throat, “Auhhh…” he says dumbly. It was bad enough that Billy was labeled as a fucking <em>stud</em> at school. How was it possible to look hotter like this?</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“What’re you doin’ here?” Billy asks sleepily, voice rough.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Oh – right. Uh, I need your help with my car.” Steve blurts out.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy squints, “Your car?” he asks, looking at the BMW past Steve’s shoulder. “What about it?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I need an oil change. Byers never showed and all the shops around here are booked.” Steve explains. “I’d do it myself except…”<br/><br/></span>
    <span> “Except you don’t know how.” Billy finishes the sentence.<br/><br/>“…Yeah.” Steve admits, a little embarrassed. He was <em>gonna</em> learn with Jonathan’s help but, here he is instead.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs, “Y’know…it’s my day off, Harrington.” Steve makes a regretful face, mouthing “sorry”. “When you need it done by?” Billy asks.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I have work at 11:30.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“<em>Today?</em>” Billy groans. “Fuck…” Billy takes a deep breath and sighs dramatically, “God you fucking <em>owe</em> me.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve perks up at that. Billy was agreeing to help him out. “I have money,” Steve offers, “y’know, for the help.”<br/><br/>“How else you gonna change your oil, Harrington? <em>You’re</em> gonna buying that shit.” Billy waves Steve inside as he heads back to his room. Steve closes the door softly and takes a quick look around the home. He hears voices in the back of the house, probably Billy letting Max know where he’s going. The blond emerges back into the front entrance wearing a hoodie and some old looking Chuck’s, “Let’s go.” He says, shoving his keys and wallet in the front pouch of his sweater.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>They take Steve’s car to the auto parts store and thank fuck they live in a small town where everything opens by 8 a.m. Steve follows Billy zigzagging through the aisles to the back corner of the store. He walks over to this book hanging off the shelf of filters. Billy thumbs the book to “BMW” and swipes the pages with the right model and year. He drags his finger down and across and finds what he’s looking for. “Alright Harrington, first lesson,” Billy says, hitting Steve on his chest with the back of his hand to get his attention, “you see this? This book has every single make and model car in here. It tells you what filter number fits your car. See?” Steve looks down and read the page over, nodding. “Alright so we have to look for this number for this brand. And I recommend this brand because it doesn’t crack or dent easily like the other shit.” They scan the numerical shelves looking for the part and find it with success. Billy briefly explains what oil to buy and to “<em>always get the gallon.</em>” Once Steve pays for everything at the register, they head back to Billy’s house. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy moves with ease as he brings out everything needed for the job, talking Steve through it all as they set up. Billy pushes his sleeves up and dives right in as he instructs Steve what to do, which the brunet simply mimics the blond. With the car jacked up, Steve crawls under the car with Billy and does everything himself under Billy’s instruction and small corrections. The only part Billy does himself is the actual draining of the oil pan into a small bucket because, “If you don’t know what you’re doing, this shit will spill everywhere.”<br/><br/>“What do you if it does?” Steve asks.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Gotta clean it up. Cat litter or sawdust usually does the trick to soak up the oil. Then you toss it out.” Billy explains, lining up the bucket being used to catch the old oil.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>They continue to work together, and Billy has to admit, Steve picked this up rather quick. And Steve – he feels pretty good about working on his own car, learning the anatomy of it all, dirtying his hands. He could do this again himself in the future instead of paying someone else to do it. Once they’re all done, they clean up and Steve helps Billy put everything away back into the shed around the side of the house. Billy funnels the thick black oil into an old oil bottle on the workbench, “You’re gonna wanna take this to a shop to get thrown away properly.” He says, screwing the cap tightly and wiping it down clean with a rag.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve finishes up scrubbing smeared oil off his arms and under his fingernails and grabs the bottle from Billy, “Thanks, man.” He says. Billy nods, wiping whatever oil off on his hands with the rag before walking to the sink to wash them. Steve looks at his watch and sees how quickly they got done. “Damn. Got a whole half hour till my shift.” He runs his fingers through his sweaty hair, “I really appreciate what you did for me. Like, really.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Whatever, Harrington.” Billy grumbles, not wanting to make a big deal out of it.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“No seriously man. You saved my ass,” Steve insists. “I owe ya.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal"><span>“Yeah well, I’ll cash that in when I need something in return.” The knob squeaks as the water shuts off and Billy flicks his wrists to shake droplets of water off. “Deal?”</span> <br/><br/><span><span>“Yeah. Deal.” Steve agrees, smiling like an idiot. “Well uh, thanks again. I gotta get to work to change.” Billy nods wordlessly, drying his hands on his sweater before shutting the shed door and locking it. Harrington jogs to his car with the oil in hand and heads to the mall for work. Billy lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and rests his head against his braced arm on the window of the shed. He closes his eyes and takes a few breaths. In Billy’s mind – this whole <em>thing</em>, trying to be friends with Harrington, is making Billy reach for something he knows is unattainable. He reasons with himself that it’s <em>just</em> friendship. It’s innocent. There’s nothing wrong with making friends with other guys. <em>As long as I don’t give a reason otherwise.</em></span></span></p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Edit 20200405: I re-read over the part where Neil is talking to Steve about basketball and realized I left out a part. Sorry!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>

<p></p><div>
  <p class="MsoNormal">For the first time like ever, Steve found himself bored beyond belief with nothing to do on his day off. He saw Dustin off to camp for the month and the other party members were on their own adventures without him. Robin picked up an extra shift on what would’ve been her day off with Steve, and Nance and Jonathan were working over at the post. “Fuck I need to get outta here.” Steve sighs.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Steve drove around town looking at all the closed stores on main street, “Jesus. It’s like a ghost town…” he says to himself. He remembers Nancy talking about how stores were closing since the opening of the mall, but he didn’t think it was <em>this </em>bad. At least some of the other popular places were still around. But seeing as nothing was really grabbing his attention, he heads for the mall. He could bug Robin, buy a new top or two, and take care of bills his parents left him to. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">It’s busy as usual at Starcourt. It’s crowded with kids running around in groups, teens like Steve shopping for the latest fashion, families eating together – amazement all in their eyes of what the still shiny new mall had to offer. Steve made a quick stop to the food court to get a little something for Robin to munch on for lunch in between serving customers. Shortly after stopping by, she shooed him away so he couldn’t distract her as she slung ice cream solo. Sipping on a soda he refilled for himself at Scoops, Steve decided to check out some of the stores he’d been meaning to look at.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">With a bag hanging off his forearm, Steve roams the mall nursing the same soda, gnawing the straw as he browses the store floor of several businesses. He’s in JC Penny for shits in giggles when he notices a familiar redhead. He’s about to call out to Max when he spots that she’s with her mom. <em>Wow she looks exactly like her</em>, Steve notices. Deciding he won’t say hi, seeing as Max was busy, Steve see’s Billy come around talking to the woman. And thinking nothing of it, Steve just walks over to say hi anyway. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“How’s it goin’ Hargrove,” Steve says, catching Billy off guard. The blond looks up, surprised to see an unexpected face.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Oh you know,” Billy murmurs, he looks to Max and her mom who don’t seem to notice Steve, “family shopping.” He sees a shopping bag from GAP hanging off Steve’s arm, “See you’re doin’ the same.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Steve looks at the bag Billy’s pointing at and smiles, “Yeah, somethin’ like that. Minus the family.” <em>Wow that’s sad said out loud,</em> Steve realizes. He clears his throat quickly, “Today your day off I take it?”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah. Heather and I switched shifts since I covered for her the other day,” Billy explains. “And somehow that got me roped into this.” He mumbles lowly, looking over his shoulder to see Susan still busy with Max looking through the clearance section. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“I guess it’s nice every once in a while,” Steve counters optimistically. He sure wished he had someone to hang out with today. And Max is pretty fun to be around with. But the look on Billy’s face suggested he rather not be here.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Billy.” A deep voice calls out sharply. Billy doesn’t exactly jump at his name being called but he whips around quick enough to make it seem that way. Steve sees a man approaching them, eyeing him warily and slowing his chewing around a white piece of gum before looking back at Billy, “Who’s this?” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Steve Harrington,” Steve introduces himself with his hand out. The man, who Steve assumes is Billy’s dad, takes it a little too firmly and shakes it briefly.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Neil Hargrove, Billy’s father,” <em>yupp, as I thought,</em> “you look familiar.” He adds, looking at him as if he’s trying to figure out from where.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Oh, uh well, I was on the varsity basketball team with Billy this past year,” Steve explains to clarify the recognition. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“That’s right,” Neil remembers, his memory coming back to him. “Point guard, right?” He points, testing himself.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Ah yeah, yeah that’s me.” Steve nods, smiling sheepishly from being in this small spotlight. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah I remember the playoffs at State,” Neil continues, “y’all did well getting there.” He looks to Billy and his mouth twitches, “Too bad you didn’t get past the second game.” He says in disappointment, and Billy looks away.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">With the vibe of the conversation changing, Steve recognizes what’s happening here. Fuck, how could have he forgotten? Billy’s dad – er, Neil, had attended the games, watching and coaching from the stands. Steve had to admit, Billy was their ace. He was <em>really</em> good. So the pressure was on once the team got invited to State Championships. They had been tied up and were in their <em>third</em> overtime. Everyone was exhausted and getting sloppy. Billy had the perfect set up for a three pointer and when he took the shot, it rebounded into the opponent’s hand and hauled ass to the opposite end of the court – which <em>no one was defending</em> and scored. Their loss disqualified them to continue further and they were out for the rest of the championship. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">The whole team felt at fault for not backing Billy up, but he shouldered it all. When the team gathered around on the sidelines hearing their coach cheering them up, Steve saw Billy getting his ass chewed out by his dad about his performance he guessed.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“He’s the best shooting guard our team has ever had. Our school has never gotten that far or had that great of a season in any sport in Hawkins. I’ve learned a lot from Billy.” Steve expresses genuinely, defending his old classmate. Not in spite of Hargrove’s asshole father but because Steve became a more proficient player with Billy’s help. And it was only right to give credit where it’s due, and Billy not only deserved that credit but earned it. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Steve sees Neil flex his jaw, and no, it wasn’t from chewing his gum. hums in after thought, not exactly agreeing with Steve, “Yeah well, that wasn’t enough now was it?” Billy shifts again, growing tense and anxious from remembering how much shit he got.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Y’see my son took his team to Nationals the year before we moved,” Neil continues, sounding almost proud. “Had a damn near perfect season all the way through. If Billy worked on fouling out, it would’ve been a perfect streak.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy rolls his eyes, “It was a bullshit call,” he defends himself tiredly, like they’d discussed this before.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“That may be so, but it was your fifth one and you got taken out – making your team lose. If you hadn’t had made it to Nationals, you wouldn’t be driving that car you have now.” Neil says with ease, clearly trying not to make a scene out of something so trivial. And Billy shifts, not wanting to hear what his father had to say. “And you let your teammates down at state when you missed your three-pointer.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Jesus Christ. <em>That’s </em>how Billy got his Camaro? For playing sports and taking them to <em>Nationals?</em> And Nationals?! Billy is the biggest boaster Steve’s ever met, and this prick didn’t even talk about that?</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Steve clears his throat, regaining the Hargrove men’s attention, “Well Billy really pulled the team together to play the way we did. Wouldn’t have gotten there without him.” He adds with a tight smile. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Hmm,” Neil murmurs, “well, it was nice chatting with you Steve. Have time to spend with the wife.” Before walking away, Neil gives Billy a look that says, ‘<em>wrap this up’.</em> Steve got the immediate feeling that he didn’t make too well of an in-person impression.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">They wait until Neil is at a good distance before speaking again, “Wow,” Steve says first, “your dad gives mine competition for the biggest asshole award.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Hey.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“I’m just sayin’ man, I may be crossin’ the line here but you gotta admit that was pretty shitty just now.” Steve may know fuck all about Billy and his family, and they may be from different backgrounds, but he did know one thing: it was unfair for Billy to be under such scrutiny. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy should be mad. Mad that Harrington had to see this side of him under the lens of his dad. Mad that Harrington was <em>sticking up</em> for him against his dad. And mad that he doesn’t feel mad. He’s numbed to first degree put downs from the older man. And that wasn’t even anything <em>close</em> to what he hears on a harsher basis. “…Thanks.” Billy finally says.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">It’s not what Steve’s expects. ‘Thanks’? For what exactly? “Yeah...” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">They feel something they assume the other doesn’t. Like these small run ins are bridging them together to kindle a friendship at an unhurried pace. It was different from any other friendship, or relationship, they’d experienced.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Well listen uh, I’m gonna head out. Have bills to pay,” Steve says, not wanting the tension to grow uncomfortable. “But if you <em>want</em>, we can hang out sometime.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy raises his scarred brow, “Hang out?” he repeats. Steve nods but doesn’t add anything, “And do what?” he asks in a way that makes the idea sound dumb and boring already.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Y’know, <em>hang out.</em> Get high, catch a movie, whatever…” Steve shrugs. “You know where to find me if any of that sounds good.” He gives a lopsided smirk and lightly smack Billy’s arm. “See ya.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy doesn’t say anything as he watches Steve walk out of the department store. He just got an invitation to spend time with Harrington whenever he wanted. “Billy.” Neil calls out again. They’re moving to a different part of the store now, and Billy follows. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to take the graduate up on his offer.</p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
  <p class="MsoNormal">The keys clatter against the gate to the community pool as Billy unlocks it to let himself in. He’s been going into work two hours early to prep for opening. He’s been teaching all of the aqua tot levels three times a week from 8:30 to 11:50 for the past three weeks and today was the last day of class for his “guppies”. Billy went through the list of kids who would advance to the next level and kids who needed to continue at the same one. Once his last class finishes, he’s done for the day until his next scheduled shift two days from now.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">He thinks about what to do afterwards to keep him away from his house. Max was gonna be out skating and head to the arcade with Lucas later. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <em> “But if you want, we can hang out sometime.” </em>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy stops writing on the swimming certificate to think about Harrington’s offer. He wasn’t sure if Harrington was working today or tomorrow and almost lets himself stop there, thinking that it was hopeless. But then again, being out was better than being at home. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy’s last group of kids are sent off to their parents with their certificates and lollipops. As he puts all the equipment away, the first shift climbs up in their towers and the pool-goers are let in. He’s showered, changed, clocked out, and sitting in his car in record time. He has his check folded and tucked in his jacket, waiting to be spent. He debates how he should go about all this, hanging out with Steve that is. It has to be tactful, on the down low. He bites his thumb, thinking long and hard.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">An idea pops into his mind and smirks to himself. “That’s fucking perfect.” He fires up his car and pulls out of the parking lot, heading straight to Starcourt. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Long time no see,” Robin greets Billy, “how may I help you, friend?”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy’s not sure what to say to this girl, <em>Robin</em>, he reads on her nametag. He nods hello to her, “Uh…Harrington here?” he asks carefully. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah he is,” Robin says, but nothing else. She smiles, waiting for Billy to spell it out for her.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">A few moments pass with them staring at each other in silence and Billy raises his brows, <em>well?</em> But when Robin mimics him mockingly, Billy leans a bit, “You gonna call him out here or not?” Her grin is irritating him, as if she were toying with him. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Would you like me to?” She asks.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy inhales sharply, already annoyed, “<em>Yes</em>.” He hisses at the obvious. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Robin rolls her eyes and turns around to open the sliding divider to call Steve to the serving floor. “Why who’s here?” Billy can hear him say from the back room. Steve pops looks through and sees him, “Hargrove?” Billy jerks his chin upward and Steve walks around to meet him. He’s wiping his hands off the stupid little apron on the front of his uniform and looks...happy to see him? “What brings you here?”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Well I was in the area and uh was wondering if – “Billy starts but sees Robin staring at them from the corner of his eye. He turns to her with a <em>‘can I help you’</em> expression. Robin simply gives him a knowing look and slinks off to the back to give the boys some <em>privacy</em>, seeing as her presence wasn’t wanted by her ally. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Looking back at Steve, Billy licks his lips out of nervousness, “was wondering what plans you had tonight. I’m taking Max and Lucas to the movies later and don’t wanna be a lame ass being there with them.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Oh it’d be like third wheeling on their date, right?” Steve asks. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal"><em> Fuck that sounds so pathetic pointed out like that, </em> Billy thinks. “Yeah. Plus, I don’t have anyone to go with so, figured you might be down to go.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Steve knew Billy had a line of girls he could pick and choose from to go with him. It was a little strange that he’d ask him to tag along but, he had offered to hangout whenever. “Uh yeah, I am actually. The part time kids are coming in to close. Should be done around 7:30 or so.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal"><em> Perfect, </em> “Cool. Wanna meet up at 8 then?” Billy says coolly.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah, yeah. It shouldn’t take me long to head home, change, and head back.” Steve sees that more customers are headed in and he excuses himself to takes the register. “I’ll see ya then, yeah?” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">As expected, Billy finds Max at the arcade with Lucas playing Dig Dug for the millionth time. He squeezes by several kids just to get to her. She’s laughing and nudging Lucas as she plays, happy to be out with him alone without their other friends. “Max,” he calls out to her. She whips her head in Billy’s direction and immediately frowns.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“What?” She grumbles, going back to her game with furrowed brows. Lucas straightens up passively, hoping that Billy didn’t come here to argue. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Why are you giving me shit when I haven’t done anything.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“<em>Yet,</em>” Max mutters. </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy can’t get pissed now. He clenches his jaw but lets it go. She did have a point after all. He steps in closer so she can hear him out, “Don’t ask me why, but would you wanna go to the movies tonight? You can bring your boyfriend and we don’t even have to sit by each other. Shit, we don’t even have to see the same movie.”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Max looks back at Billy, risking at losing her game in the process. Because this was interesting, and Billy’s captured her attention. “What? Why?” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“I said don’t ask,” Billy reminds her. “We have a deal or not?”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Max thinks about it before turning to Lucas to see what he was thinking. And judging by the look on his face, she should press a little more.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Max twists back, “What time?” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“Eight. Wanna go or what?”</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">She narrows her eyes, “And you’re paying?” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“God – if I do will you fucking come with me?” Billy exasperates.</p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">“You’re being really weird y’know.” </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">Billy looks away and sighs, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek. <em>You need this, don’t fuck it up.</em> He rolls his eyes and sucks his teeth, “Look, I know I’ve been an asshole the whole time you’ve known me. I’m just – “he stops himself for a second because shit, he was about to be halfway honest with Max. “– let me not be.”<br/><br/>Max remains quiet for a bit longer just to torture Billy before agreeing. The blond reminds them again of what time to meet there before taking off to God elsewhere and Max can’t help but wonder why he’s acting…differently. After last year Billy had backed off from her and her friends. But he hasn’t been getting annoyed with her as easily lately. If he loses his temper he leaves instead of yelling and breaking shit around the house. It was straight up fuckin’ <em>weird</em>. Even Lucas said something about Billy afterward he left. Whatever was going on, Max wasn’t sure what it could be.</p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve’s mind was buzzing as he headed back to the mall. Robin teased him about having a hot date tonight even though he <em>clearly</em> said he was hanging out with Billy. No way was it a date. A guy like Billy plus that idea was, way out of left field. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>But it got him thinking.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>What if other people thought the same thing? What if the seats were so packed that they couldn’t sit with a seat between them? They lived in a small town and people talked. Or would anyone say anything with Billy being there? He’s made a reputation for himself so to suggest anything like…<em>that </em>would definitely stir up some shit. And it was weird - <em>Steve</em> never worried about that shit before the fall out between him and Tommy. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>But Robin’s harmless teasing got under his skin a bit. He even worried about what to wear so Hargrove wasn’t the only one looking good – which naturally put him into another mini episode of overthinking of what this train of thought was leading him.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Yet here he was, scanning the crowd as he walks to the movies to see if he spots his little group first. He spots Billy walking away from the ticket booth and to Max and Lucas waiting around the side. He must’ve handed off their tickets because they take off immediately. <em>Well then,</em> Steve thinks to himself. So much for their little group.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Hey Hargrove,” Steve walks up to Billy, “you get tickets already?” He asks.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Ah yeah. Went ahead and gave Max her shit and she took off,” Billy mumbles. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Haha yeah I saw that on my way over.” Steve smiles. “Kids.” He shakes his head.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Little shit just took it and poof.” Billy turns to Harrington, giving him a brief look over, “Wanna get anything before we head in?” Steve looked <em>unfairly</em> attractive.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Sure. I could go for something. My treat, since you got the tickets. Want anything?” Billy wasn’t expecting that. Steve offering to pay a portion of their night out like it was no big deal. Oh – well, it wasn’t, was it?</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Sure…popcorn is fine.” Billy answers. He wasn’t sure if he should wait with Steve or if it would be fucking weird. He waits off to the side near their theater instead, trying to look uninterested. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I got us a big popcorn. Figured we could share,” Steve says around a mouth full of kernels and his other hand holding a soda. He offers the tall order to Billy, who takes a handful and shuffles it in his mouth. Steve looks up to see what movie they were about to see, “The Goonies huh? Nice.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>They walk in the theater and its fucking packed. Nearly all the damn seats are filled, and no rows of threes are available; meaning, there was no buffer seat for them. And Steve apparently didn’t want to sit in the single seats scattered between the rows. He tucks his soda against his chest with his arm to grab some more kernels from the top of the bag. “Looks like there’s two seats up top in the corner,” the brunet points up with a fistful of popcorn over the seated crowd. Billy ignores Max who sees him with Steve as they pass by her row to climb up the stairs to claim the available seats. “Man, this is nice. I haven’t been to the movies in like, forever,” Steve shares, “always letting the kids through the back of the shop to sneak in.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Wait we could’ve <em>snuck</em> in?” Billy asks.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Well, yeah. But not tonight, my boss is there to train the part timer in how to close.” Steve explains. “Otherwise? Yeah, we can totally sneak in. Not like there’s security standing by the doors in the halls. But on the inside is another story.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal"><span>“Hmn…” Billy hums. He would be mad but, Steve did agree to tag along and buy them popcorn.</span> <br/><br/></p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Throughout the movie Billy made sure to not knock his knee into Steve’s. Or his elbow touch Steve’s. Or reach for the popcorn in Steve’s lap. The back of his mind nagged at him about how he needed to act to not give any reason for anyone to suspect them being too comfortable with each other, which made him not as relaxed as he hoped to be being with Steve. And that pissed him off. This whole way of thinking was exhausting when he couldn’t even enjoy a movie with a friend. Did it make it worse that Billy was attracted to him? Maybe. But no one else knew what he felt or thought about Steve (except for Robin). </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Before he knew it, the movie was over, and the theater began to clear out. Steve was saying something about how the kid who played Mikey looked like the Byers kid’s mom’s late boyfriend or something. Billy was a little distracted how Max was watching him and Steve descending down the stairs near the exit of the theater.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Hey Steve,” Max greets the brunet, eying Billy suspiciously. “I didn’t know you were joining us.” She comments truly perturbed.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Ah yeah I just y’know, joined Billy on your guys’ date.” Steve answers, waving his finger at her and Lucas.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Date?” Lucas repeats with confusion written on his face.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Fixated on Billy, something clicks in her head. Something was happening, what it was she didn’t know but she had a feeling that she needed to go along with it. “Yeah doofus. Don’t you pay attention to anything anymore?” She chastises him. Eying Billy once more, he’s withdrawn a bit, but thankful with the look in his eyes.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah it’s not a problem,” Steve smiles, “not like you guys invite me anywhere anymore, assholes.” He teases. “You guys enjoy the movie?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Totally,” Max nods speaking for her and Lucas. “Mikey kinda reminds me of Bob.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“That’s what I thought too!” Steve exclaims. Lucas shakes his head, disagreeing that they looked nothing alike. Steve and Lucas lead their group out as they debate over the topic as Max and Billy trail behind them. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“We need to talk,” Billy mumbles in Max’s ear. It’s not in his usual threatening tone Max had grown to recognize its severity.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Steve parts ways with the trio and heads home. Billy tries not to smile when Harrington tells him how he had a good time, and that they should <em>‘do it again sometime’</em>. When he walks off, Billy turns to Lucas, “Need a ride Sinclair?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Lucas awkwardly freezes, completely caught off guard over Billy’s offer, “Oh uh, we rode my bike over here so,” he trails off. “I-I appreciate it but…” he lifts the bike off the front tire to show he has his ride covered for himself.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy nods, “No worries, just thought I’d offer.” Billy ignores Max with her arms crossed and leaned in squinting at him over what he was saying. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah. Oh and uh, thanks for the movie tonight,” Lucas adds.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Don’t mention it.” Billy sniffs, avoiding looking at the young teenager.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” Lucas says to Max, walking closer to her.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” Max leans in and kisses Lucas, not caring that Billy was present. But Lucas was stiff, worried about what Billy would do or say. But the older boy just rolls his eyes. “Get home safe, yeah?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah.” Lucas waves goodbye at her and looks back to Billy to give a nod and walks his bike off the entryway of the mall.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>The clicking sound of the bike cycling catches Billy’s attention and feels a surge of courage run through him. “Sinclair!” He calls out to the boy. Lucas stop and turns to Billy who’s approaching him now, “Listen uh,” he pauses for a second to look over his shoulder seeing Max in the same spot shooting him a deadly look. “Um…What I did before…that wasn’t…I shouldn’t have done that,” Billy says lowly, his courage forcing the words and guilt out of him. “It’s not an excuse but I was in some shit that night and…I’m pretty fucked up…so, what I’m trying to say is, is that I’m sorry.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Lucas is stunned. He’s not sure why Billy is doing this, apologizing or taking him out, but Lucas senses that Billy is going through something. It takes a lot for a man to admit to another when they’re wrong. Especially and older to a younger one. He takes a deep breath of relief, “I appreciate that,”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I don’t expect you to y’know, <em>forgive me</em> or whatever but – “Billy goes on.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“It’s okay,” Lucas interrupts with his hand up to halt Billy’s rambling. “I mean, it’s <em>not </em>– with what you did but – I mean I don’t think much of it anymore. I don’t know what or why but, you own up to it so like you said, don’t mention it…we cool?” Lucas offers his hand, a sign on truce between them. Billy takes it, feeling a bit lighter about his unexpected apology.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah, cool.” Billy says. When they let go, Billy clears his throat again, “One more thing,” he adds, “as much as I have, still, and will always find Max annoying, her and I are family. So that means we have to look out for each other. And <em>that</em> means I’m counting on you to keep making her happy. Comprende?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah, yeah of course. I gotchu.” Lucas acknowledges. He’s relieved that he and Max aren’t close because Max had already dumped him like five times already since the Snow Ball. “See you around man.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>When Lucas walks off for the second time and Billy turns back to Max, he’s hit with her stone-cold stare, “What the hell was that all about?” She questions her stepbrother.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Don’t worry about it. Guy stuff,” he dismisses, “let’s go home before Neil flips his shit.” He walks past her, expecting her to follow.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>And she does, but she continues to press him, “Uh no, tell me. You said we needed to talk, and it now includes <em>Lucas.</em>”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“God you’re so annoying,” Billy groans. “Will you get in the car first?” he asks, unlocking the doors for them. Max gets in with a quickness, holding her fixation on him.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Well? Let’s hear it.” She says expectantly. She was in her no bullshit mood now that Billy involved himself with Lucas <em>again.</em> </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Turning over the engine, Billy sighs, “Waddya wanna start with first?” he asks, seeing as things have shifted a bit.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“What did you say to Lucas?” She asks without batting an eye.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“To make you happy.” Billy answers short.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Bullshit,” she barks sharply. When Billy rolls his eyes and sighs, she keeps at it, “What else.” She presses.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“That I’m sorry.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“What?” She half laughs. “For what?” She asks, feeling his second answer was like the first; total and utter bullshit.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“C’mon Max you know what for.” Billy grouses, sinking deeper into the driver’s seat. He wasn’t about to get into his feelings or whatever with a fucking 14-year-old girl.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I want you to <em>say it</em>,” Max enunciates, “otherwise I won’t believe you.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“You don’t believe me anyway,” Billy counters.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“That’s for me to decide, shit bird.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy sighs dramatically, “For going fucking psycho on him last year.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Max narrows her eyes, coupled with her arms crossed over her chest again. She leans back into her seat, “And what he say?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Her brother shrugs, “Not to mention it. We’re cool now.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“<em>” You’re cool”</em>?” Max scoffs at Billy when he nods. “You’re so full of shit – “</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Oh yeah well then ask your <em>boyfriend</em>,” Billy says loudly over her. “Jesus.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Max shuts up because oh, she <em>will</em> ask Lucas exactly what Billy said to him. It’s quiet in the cabin and Max can’t wrap her head around the idea of Billy apologizing to Lucas. “Why are you doing all of this?” She asks, referring to tonight.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Consider it a step forward to me not being a total asshole to you,” Billy says. Seeing as Max didn’t understand what he meant by his words, he elaborates, “I’m trying to make it up to you alright?” Billy exasperates, letting go of the wheel for a moment. He swears under his breath, realizing Max won’t let this go unless he shows all his cards.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I haven’t been the best brother to you,” Billy starts of in a grumble. “There’s a lot of shit you don’t know about, and that I don’t want you to know about. At least not yet.” He wasn’t sure what Max should or shouldn’t know about their family. Especially if Susan was shielding her from the truth. Not to discredit her for being a smart kid but, he feared her knowledge would put her in jeopardy in some way. Call it overthinking. “We both know why we moved here, Max. My dad felt threatened by yours in the off chance that your mom had second thoughts or cheated on him with your dad. He’s paranoid about that stuff because of my mom. But he drove her to the edge, and she left him. So, what better way to secure a new marriage than moving far away from something that threatens your new life?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Max remains quiet. She knew it was partly because of her dad and partly believed it had <em>something</em> to do with Neil. When she blamed Billy for them moving, she was really blaming his dad. But now that she knew Neil’s twisted rationality, it made sense.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“It just so happened to help him run away from the memories he has with my mom…She’s still there, remarried…” Billy didn’t want to say the rest because it may disrupt this civility between him and his step sister. “Moving here and seeing you with Lucas, it reminded me how my dad reacted when my mom remarried…to Eric, a black guy my dad was accusing her of cheating with. And I couldn’t let him find out and start to treat you like – “Shit<em>.</em></span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Wait – you’re telling me the reason you went berserk on Lucas was because of your racist ass <em>dad</em>?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <em>
      <span>This was nice while it lasted, </span>
    </em>
    <span>Billy thought. “Max – “</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“You <em>do</em> realize how messed up that is right?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Will you let me finish?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“God you’re such an <em>asshole</em>.” Max says with venom laced in her voice.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy sighs and waits for Max to calm down some, hoping he hasn’t lost her. “My judgement was…clouded. Alright? That night I was so pissed off at you and had to kiss ass to everyone just to find out where you were,” he says in a disgusted tone. “And I just wanted to protect you, even if it meant hurting you or disband you from the party… I’m well aware of how fucked that is but it’s the truth.” He lets his head thud back on the headrest of his seat. He’s slowed down his driving now, going five under the speed limit. “I’m sorry.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Max wants to cry but she doesn’t. She furrows her brows and pouts, no sure how she should interpret any of this. But she remembers something Billy said, “Earlier, when you said you didn’t want Neil to find out about Lucas. You said you didn’t want him to treat me like something. What were you going to say?” She asks softly.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>It’s quiet again, and Billy flexes his jaw. He was talking faster than what his mind wanted to reveal, and she caught onto his slip up before cutting him off.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Can I tell you something without you getting mad at me?” She asks Billy. When he doesn’t say anything, she takes it as something to tread carefully with. “I’m pretty sure that your dad hits you.” Billy can’t even bring himself to shoot Max a glaring look for her to shut up. And yet he doesn’t confirm or deny it. So Max continues,</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I know you get into fights to cover what happens at home,” She says with a shaky breath. “I remember I came home one time, my mom was taking a nap, and I heard it. I guess he didn’t know I had gotten home but I heard him hitting you and you…asking for him to stop. But he kept on doing it.” A sense of guilt strikes Max. She felt responsible for Billy getting hit that day she was just describing. Neil was upset about how Billy didn’t wait for her at school to drive her home. Even now, she feels guilty for not saying anything to anyone who could help. “I hid in the kitchen when he was finished. And later when I saw you, I noticed your knuckles weren’t bruised like they usually are when you get into fights at school. That’s when I knew that he hits you.” She left out the part where she heard Billy crying and wincing from the pain. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Putting two and two together, Max saw that in Billy’s own way, he was protecting her from any possibility that his dad would redirect his anger towards her. If Neil found out about Lucas, things wouldn’t end well for either of them.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Well, Billy was right about Max being smart. So much for hiding shit from she didn’t need to know about. “Yeah well,” he sniffs, “it is what it is.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“It’s not <em>right,</em>” Max blurts out. “How can you just take it and not fight back?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“You wouldn’t understand, Max,” Billy exhales again. He feels a headache starting to form and making him grow tired.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“What, because I’m a <em>girl</em>?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yes! It’s exactly because you’re a girl.” Billy shouts, not meaning his tone and volume to be harsh. He takes a deep breath, piecing how he should explain this to her, “Maxine,” Billy starts, rubbing his mouth with the back of his hand, “there are some things that we’re taught when we’re kids to understand where we fit in the world. How to act, how to speak, expectations – all that shit is indoctrinated into you. For guys, the way we act is like one big dog and pony show of an initiation to ‘becoming a man’.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“That is such bullshit.” Max mutters, annoyed by the macho-man persona Billy speaks of.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“It’s true!” He insists. “There’s some shit you can do, are <em>expected</em> to do, as a girl. And if I tried that shit? Nah, I wouldn’t been seen as a man.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Why do you even care about what other people think?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks. My <em>dad</em> does.” Billy clarifies.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“But you’re your own person – “</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Not to him.” Billy wrings the steering wheel. Anxiety gnawing at him with how real this entire conversation is getting. “In his mind, I <em>belong</em> to him. And to him, I’m nothing but a fucking disappointment.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Then how come you’re trying to prove something to him? Why does he hurt you, Billy?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Finally circling back to Billy’s original intention of their whole conversation, “That’s what I need to talk to you about,” he murmurs. He readjusts himself in his seat, slowing down at the stop light. “I know you’re wondering why Harrington was there with us right?”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Yeah. What was that about? And lying that you were like, supervising our date we didn’t even have. What does that have anything to do with what I just asked? Or about Neil?”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>His voice is caught in his throat – his delicate image masculinity straining to hold back the truth, seeking oh so desperately to be freed and known in the world. His hands start to sweat and tremble some, physically emulating the internal battle between reputation and truth. When the light turns green, Billy too continues, “My dad thought the way my mom was raising me was making me a pussy,” he starts, “so when she left, he did everything to make sure I didn’t turn out to be one.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“But,” he continues, “moving to Hawkins…all the high school girls were just excuses to distract and convince myself that I’m the man my dad expects me to be. Like I’ll fail if I don’t.” <em>Jesus Hargrove just say it</em>. “But now? I’m realizing that this is all just some bullshit make believe story I’m forced to live to prove my dad’s grade A parenting. <em>‘See! I did it! All the beatings proved worthwhile! He ain’t no faggot! He’s a man!’</em>” Billy mocks in his father’s bravado. Billy shakes his head, huffing “What a fucking <em>joke</em>.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy hasn’t said directly, but Max doesn’t need him to. She understands. Neil’s abuse was a preventative measure to ensure Billy didn’t turn out to be anything other than a masculine, heterosexual man. But just to be clear, “So <em>Steve</em>…” she baits. Billy sniffles and nods, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles burned white. She nods, sliding deeper into her seat with the idea of Billy liking Steve rolling around in his mind. Then she realizes something, “Wait!” She straightens up, “So that time at scoops – I thought you were just being weird. But you were actually…” <em>Flirting</em>. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Are we done?” Billy asks, hoping for the conversation to end there. Which it does, thankfully. Her thoughts are flying through her mind faster than it can process to filter what everything meant. After a while, she comes to understand that Billy’s, <em>gay</em>. Wow. Wow okay. The remainder of ride to their house is quiet with the weight of their conversation marinating into the deep cervices of their minds until it created a new awkward bridge in their relationship.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>They pull up to the curb of their house and sit in the car long after Billy’s killed the engine, waiting for the other to say something. Max feels Billy’s been exceptionally vulnerable tonight, and maybe she should speak up first. “Thanks for telling me,” she starts, looking at her brother. “I get it now and, I also forgive you for what you did. And, I’m sorry too – for making your life Hell when it didn’t need to be. I didn’t know then but, when I did, I acted as if I didn’t. So, I’m sorry.”</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy is staring at his lap, picking off small pieces of imaginary fuzz off his jeans and nods his head slightly, remaining quiet to let her finish what she had to say to him. “I know you’re looking out for me in your own way, I guess. And,” she reaches out to hold Billy’s hand, “I won’t tell anyone. About any of it.”</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>Billy inhales sharply, relief and Max’s trust flooding him to ease. Max doesn’t ask him if she’s the first or only one he’s told his secret to but it’s a secret she will keep. She lightly squeezes his hand to reassure him that he can trust her. He squeezes back, holding onto her to keep himself together. “Just don’t get hurt.” He hears Max say.</span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Whaddyou mean?” Billy asks, finally looking up and talking again.</span>
    
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>“Steve,” she says, “I don’t really know him but,” Max shrugs and trails off, trying to find the right words to not upset him, “it would suck if you guys y’know…just stayed as friends.” She says delicately. Though this is new knowledge to her, deep down Max wished Billy would become less of a dick and find happiness in whatever way he found satisfying. </span>
  </p>
  <p class="MsoNormal">
    <span>However, as concerned as Max was for him, Billy was not easily discouraged by unrequited interest or worried about if shit went south between him and Harrington. “Don’t worry about it,” he dismisses. Billy doesn’t exactly expect anything beyond friendship to come of all this to begin with. “Let’s get inside. Susan keeps looking out the window.”</span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
    <span>
      <span>They get out of the car and walk alongside each other to the front door. Moving to Hawkins made Billy resent everyone around him. But after some time, it’s made him realize that it’s just as Max had said; it’s not so bad – if you don’t make it out to be.</span>
    </span>
    <br/>
  </p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin was kind enough to sling ice cream while Steve caught up with Dustin. He missed him more than he would like to admit but, it was nice having a visit from someone who wasn’t trying to sneak into the movies through the Scoops Ahoy delivery halls. Once Henderson left, Steve went back to behind the counter to help his co-worker out. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re in a good mood,” Robin comments, “What? Getting tired of me already?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What? No! You’re great it’s just, he’s a good kid,” he says fixing his stupid hat, “missed him n’ junk.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh-huh,” Robin hums, “well you seem to be pretty entertained with <em>Hargrove</em> lately.” She catches the slightest curl in Steve’s smile, “Did you have fun the other night?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Other night?” Steve questions. “Oh. You mean the movies?” He hadn’t even told her about that. “How’d you know?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hello, I can hear everything,” Robin explains, “you, <em>and your child friend</em>, are extremely loud.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh…well, yeah as a matter of fact I did.” Steve says so confidently. “He got the tickets and I got the popcorn.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Sounds like a date.” Robin suggests bluntly with her infuriating knowing smirk. She enjoys the way Steve’s little brain short circuits from her comment, little smoky clouds escaping from his ears.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Excuse me?” He squeaks after processing her words. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m kidding, dingus,” Robin says with a smile, she gives a short shrug of her shoulders, “glad you had a good time is all.” She turns back to wipe down the counters.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“But it <em>wasn’t</em> – “Steve starts to explain but stops midway. When his words are caught in his throat and his thought process stalls, Steve start to panic a bit.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I was kidding, Steve. Just a joke,” Robin reiterates gently. “I know you two didn’t always get along, so I think it’s nice you two reconciled and are friends.” She turns around to look at him and sees the concern on his face. And it’s one she’s familiar with. But she’s not exactly sure which concern Steve is having internal conflict with; perception or questioning of oneself. “Hey, Steve? Steve.” She lightly pushes his shoulder with her fingertips, “Listen,” Steve looks at her, and Robin’s mind scurries to find the right words, “whatever it is…it’s okay. Alright?” It’s ambiguous but offers comfort. If Steve had something to share, he could come to her about it.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And her words help some, but later that night when Steve got home, he couldn’t move past their conversation, as brief as it was.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Because Robin wasn’t <em>wrong.</em></span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It <em>did</em> feel like a date. Billy covered his ticket and Steve wanted to get them some snacks. They sat together. And Steve didn’t mind at all. It was nice to be out, but it was nicer to spend actual time with Billy. But it wasn’t like he could tell him that because the whole time it seemed like Billy was, uncomfortable or something. It could’ve been how close they were but if even it were the case he didn’t bitch and he probably would’ve sat elsewhere solo. Call him crazy but to Steve it almost seemed as if it were Billy who was the one worried about making him uncomfortable. The facts of that night added up in Steve’s mind to the familiar anxieties of…a first date.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He honestly felt like he was reading into to it too much. ‘Cause, pfft, c’mon. Billy Hargrove? On a date with a <em>guy</em>? Nah, no way would that ever actually happen. Hargrove was a guy’s guy. He would <em>never</em>. With that, Steve swiped the ridiculous thought away from his mind. But some curiosity lingered around that he couldn’t help but consider: what <em>would</em> it be like to have Billy’s attention? In <em>“that way”</em>?</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve laid in bed staring at the ceiling as he mulled over the idea. As strange as it seemed at first to think about a dude, Steve didn’t exactly dislike it. He admitted to himself long ago Billy was good looking. He had a vibe that was not at <em>all</em> of the Midwest that was Hawkins. He has that bad boy image mothers warn their daughters about. And being from California gave him the laidback “I don’t care” impression too, which made him that much cooler. Steve saw the appeal and most definitely felt swept by him to some degree like the girls at school.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Other aspects of him intrigued and annoyed Steve at the same time. Like the fact that Billy was surprisingly charismatic. It was almost as if he was always at the ready to talk shit right back to anyone who dared to first. But he also knew exactly what to say to people when he wanted something with his charms, and it worked every fucking time. Especially with his pearly white grin? It was like – his signature. Unmistakable. It even made Steve’s heart flutter a bit knowing how handsome the bastard was.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With all this, Steve furrows his brows a small quiet voice in the back of his mind tells him it was inappropriate to think of Billy in such a way. A sense of guilt sweeps him in this supposed wrongness. He’s about to yield to that warning but decides to explore it more. Was it <em>wrong</em> to think about Billy? To be <em>curious</em>? It’s nothing major, he reasons with himself. Just, <em>curiosity</em>, is all. And purely innocent. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Or was it wrong for other reasons? Like how it’s socially unacceptable to be attracted to the same sex as yourself. That it’s “sin”.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>If that’s the reason behind the warning from the voice, to feel shame over what currently feels natural or whatever then, fuck that. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It’s not like anyone has to know, right? Or find out for that matter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <b>
    <span>Fourth of July</span>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Pretty much everywhere in Hawkins had closed shop for the fourth. With it being Independence Day and the town carnival in full swing for the whole day, no one would be working. And if they were? Hours operated on a shorter schedule so that no one missed out.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Which meant Billy and Steve worked their usual shift until sundown. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>A beautiful hot summer’s day simply <em>had</em> to involve the pool and ice cream. Which patrons got plenty of until the last of Hawkins businesses began to close shop once seven struck the clock. Steve had promised Dustin he would hang out with him and the gang at the carnival for a few before the younger teen radioed in with Suzie later. Which was fine by Steve. He planned on spending a few bucks at some booths, win a prize or two, and get high enough to scarf down his weight in fried carnie food.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He was able to spot the boys at a ring toss booth. And to no surprise, Mike wasn’t with the rest of the party, seeing as he spent damn near every waking moment with El. But who can blame them? He remembers what it was like to have his first girlfriend. Or being in love and wanting to be with the other as much as possible. He <em>was</em> surprised to not find Max with them. “Hey uh,” Steve says to Lucas, looking around to make sure he wasn’t overlooking, “where’s Max?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Her folks wanted to spend some family time,” Lucas explained. He watched Dustin and Will try their luck at trying to win a prize on their third attempt.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh,” Steve blinks, “well that’s nice I guess.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah. Seemed pretty excited about it,” Lucas mentions, “Billy did too. He’s been…different, lately.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Different how?” Steve asks, his curiosity piqued with undivided attention to the younger boy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“After that night, when we all went to the movies, he’s been like, super chill. He even apologized to me.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Whoa he did what?” Steve back peddles. “When, like after I left?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah man. Said sorry for that night. Y’know, the <em>one.</em>” Lucas hinted.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Right, right,” Steve follows, nodding his head and all. “Wow…he <em>actually </em>said that? That he was sorry?” He asks again in disbelief. It seemed so <em>unlike</em> Billy to do something like that. But then again, Steve noticed subtle changes in the other. He thought, maybe people were actually capable of change after all. Some, at least. “And so – what, you two are cool now, or…?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh yeah, everything’s okay,” Lucas says, “I had put that shit behind me a while ago anyway, and Max seems happier too so, it’s all good.” Steve nods and claps Lucas on the back, amazed in how mature Lucas is. They pull Dustin and Will away from the booth before they surrendered their remaining tickets and walk off elsewhere to explore the grounds to try their hand at other rigged carnival games. Steve kept an eye on his watch to keep track of when the boys had to leave. They had helped Lucas find Erica so they could join their parents at the cookout area, and Will ran into Jonathan to take him home. And not too long after, Dustin took off too to talk to Suzie. And once again, Steve was alone.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin had told him before closing that she wouldn’t be going to the carnival. <em>“I have better ways to waste my time rather than my money.”</em> She had told him. Which was a bummer since he’s learned that she’s actually pretty cool. Well, he supposes he could get high in the parking lot before the firework show. He walks against the incoming crowd toward the entrance and bumps into someone hard, “Oh shit, my bad,” Steve says looking back at the person.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You always look at the ground to get to where you’re going, Harrington?” The familiar voice teases.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve sighs and laughs, “Why is it that I’m always running into you, Hargrove?” The blond shrugs, smiling wide. “Your folks around?” Steve asks.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Nah. They’re at home. Came by to “play games””, Billy says in air quotations, “dropped Max off for a little bit to hang with Lucas.” Billy says with a wink. He looks at Steve and back at the entrance, “You uh, headed out?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh, I was just,” Steve points at the parking lot, “I have uh,” he coughs and rubs his nose, “some stuff I just got to, y’know, smoke.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy raises an interested brow, “Alone?” He asks in a suggestive tone, clearly wanting an invite to join Harrington.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well if you care to <em>partake</em>,” Steve offers, walking away from Billy, who happily follows. They get to Steve’s car and Billy watches him pull out an Altoids tin out from the glove compartment, “Got this the other day and been dying to smoke it,” Steve says. He had rolled up a few small slender joints in the tin and takes one out. Closing it shut, Steve stuffs it inside his jacket and nods over to the wood line surrounding the carnival, “Let’s go over there.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>After the pair indulged in getting high, they wandered back to the fair grounds to wager their skills under such influence. They cackled and stumbled about as they performed terribly at each booth, annoying the concessions manning them. At one point they ran out of tickets and began slapping single dollar bills in place of tickets needed to play – which became a game for them to one up the other with how much cash they had on hand. But when the game dealer denied their monetary fees, Steve and Billy fought over who had how much.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Okay, okay, okay.! How ‘bout this,” Steve says, doing his best to concentrate, “what if we use this to buy us food? I dunno about you but I’m starving.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Got the munchies, Harrington?” Billy asks. When the brunet pouts cutely and nods, Billy sighs. If only Steve knew what he was doing to Billy. “Alright,” the blond says, “let’s get the pretty boy whatever he wants.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yesssss,” Steve hisses victoriously, “I want funnel cake and nachos drowned in cheese.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They went to four different trucks to order everything they wanted. Steve whined whenever some food spilled over onto the ground and glared at Billy who stopped him from reaching down to pick it up and eat it. “That’s gross, Harrington. Jesus…the Camaro is that way. We’ll eat in there.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oooh, are we now?” Steve sing songs. He felt Billy’s gesture was a special exception for some reason. But what the hell, right?</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Sitting on the hood of the Camaro, they gorge on their food by the handful. “Uhmygod, disissogood,” Steve groans with his mouth full. He smacks his lips and washes everything down with the syrupy goodness of his strawberry coke. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy sobers up some from staring at Steve eating messily. Before he could get caught by the famous King, Billy looks away and clears his throat, “Hey yo Harrington,” he starts, “listen uh, I got these tickets to see Metallica later this summer.” Billy looks back at Steve who’s already looking at him with a mouth full of food, listening carefully. “What do you say? Little road trip to go to a concert?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s gaze follows the dashboard as he considers Billy’s proposition. “Well,” he mumbles around the food still in his mouth, “when is it?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Next month. On the 24th.” Billy answers.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“August huh? Cuttin’ close to the day the knuckleheads go back to school.” Steve comments.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“That’s a risk I’m willing to take.” Billy shrugs and takes a bite out of his turkey leg.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright well uh, wh-where is it?” Steve follows up, his mind clearing so he can actually remember the details before giving an answer.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy smiles and licks his lips, “San Fran.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“<em>California?</em>” Steve squawks. “You fuckin’ seriously wanna drive <em>all</em> the way out there for a <em>concert</em>?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Why the hell not?” Billy asks. “It’s a decent drive.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve scoffs and rolls his eyes, “You’re crazy.” But he isn’t exactly put off by the idea. He kinda really wants to go. To California? It was an opportunity to go somewhere that wasn’t Hawkins and actually being invited to travel. But then something crosses his mind, “Hey – why you asking me to go with you?” he asks. “Why not Dylan or Andrew?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Cuz you owe me one, Harrington. Remember?” Billy reminds him. Steve blanks for a moment before realizing what Hargrove was talking about. “Need someone to help me drive.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve gives a melodramatic sigh at the backhanded jab Billy decided to add. “Fine, I guess I’ll go. Asshole.” Billy just laughs and shares his logistics of the whole trip. Funds, the route they’ll take. All which he knows Steve isn’t exactly paying attention to, but it didn’t matter. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">Steve could tell by the look on his manager’s face how much of a pain in the ass this request was. A whole week meant the others got two extra shifts; or one if the manager came in to help instead. And what manager takes pleasure in slinging ice cream during the summer crowds of the mall? Or working with high school kids at that? None. No one. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Steve worried his lower lip, hoping the guy would give. “Hey if it helps, when I come back, I can open and close. Working those lone shifts is fine by me.” Steve offers.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Bert looks at him, unconvinced, but sighs, “Alright…fine,” he knuckles over obligingly, “you can have that week. You’ll be picking up a lot slack once you get back since those kids have school the day after you return. I need to hire more help in that case anyway so – enjoy the concert.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Thank you so much.” Steve practically shouts, trying not to look too happy. Bert waves him off to go back to work and Steve runs out of the office to go tell Robin.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“You’re fucking going <em>where?</em>” Robin asks loudly, gaping. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Will you shut up?” Steve hisses, smiling around at the people staring at the sudden outburst from her. “And you heard me right. Goin’ to a concert.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“With Billy. To California.” She adds, as if Steve himself has already forgotten the two most important facts of his news. “Wow.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“What’s the big deal? It’s just a road trip to go see a band.” Steve shrugs, to which Robin rolls her eyes. Because of <em>course</em> it’s not a big deal to this dingus. “We’re gonna team tag driving, eat on the road, sleep in the car. It’ll be fine.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Oh, I’m sure it will be, friend.” Robin says, keeping her thoughts and concerns to herself. <em>‘It’ll be fine’ he says, </em>Robin thinks. “Ruthies Inn is practically a basement. Don’t let the pit murder you.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“…The pit?” Steve repeats, confused.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin blinks and sighs, “Well, it was nice knowing you. You’re going to get stampede to death.” Steve gives her a displeased expression, insisting he could handle it. When she doubts him, it’s all they argue about during their shift.</p><p class="MsoNormal">  </p><p class="MsoNormal">Seeing at the concert wasn’t for a while, Steve and Billy start to hang out more often – that is, when Steve isn’t already hanging out with Dustin. But when they do hang out, they get high and check out old abandoned houses. Steve filled Billy in on one house that was older than Hawkins and claimed it was haunted. Calling bullshit, Billy dared Steve to go check it out. And with nothing to lose, Steve straight up hops over the fence and waltzes into the creaky building. Now, Billy wasn’t a fucking wimp, and maybe the weed was making him a little paranoid, but whenever he heard something move or scurry, he would ask Harrington if he heard it too. But Steve would brush it all off with logic. <em>“It’s probably just an animal running away from us”</em> Steve would reason, <em>“Dude c’mon, that was totally the wind”</em>. Harrington was fearless. Not at all what Billy expected the Steve to be. Steve was the preppy pretty boy who seemed like he would chicken out at the last minute. But to Billy’s surprise, bravery became the first of many new things Billy would learn about him.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Along with bravery, curiosity was another characteristic Billy discovered. For example, exploring the deserted homes taught Billy how much Steve was fascinated by <em>stuff</em>. Belongings of past residents had decorated in their homes intrigued Steve. He would pick up whatever caught his eye to examine it, ask rhetorical questions to himself and gently place them back where he found it. This made Billy imagine Steve in an antique shop and looking around the display of items for sale and ask the shop keeper about them all. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Another thing about Steve? He said some of the most interesting things when he had one too many to drink. <em>“Hey,”</em> he’d slur, <em>“B-Billy! Billy goat!”</em> Shouting to get his attention. Christ, ‘Billy goat’? He hadn’t heard that in a hot minute. <em>“When’re you gonna get that covered up with a real tattoo?”</em> Steve drunkenly pointed at his shoulder.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><em> “You’re drunk, Harrington.” </em> Billy tried to dismiss him, trying not to take offense of Steve’s comment regarding his tattoo. </p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <em> “No I’m not,” </em>
</p><p class="MsoNormal"><em> “You’re slurrin’ your words!” </em> Billy laughed at him. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Steve shakes his head, <em>“ ‘M speakin’ cursive.”</em> Brows raise into his hairline, Billy closes his eyes, trying to process what Steve was saying.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><em> “…God damn it, I hate how that somehow makes sense.” </em> Billy mutters. He tries hard not to laugh but Chirst – there was no way Steve was this impossibly endearing. <em>Ah damn,</em> Billy thought, <em>this is getting harder than I expected.</em> Concealing his crush, that is. It was already bad enough that he blabbed his mouth and invited Steve to concert road trip with (just) him, but this infatuation was becoming something bigger. And he knew this will blow up in their faces. </p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><p class="MsoNormal">After Robin had come out to Steve, their friendship had grown exponentially. They had started a conversation during one of their shifts that started off with personal interests and hobbies to romantic interests. And driving Robin home that night, he learned that Robin’s type was Tammy Thompson. A girl at their school. It threw Steve for quite a loop because holy shit he was not expecting that at all. But also because holy shit it made more sense why Robin didn’t think his and Billy’s not date wasn’t weird. More <em>importantly</em> – he could finally fucking talk to someone about the absurd amount of time thinking things over about Billy. The poor teen felt if he didn’t talk to someone about this soon, he would self-combust. Steve felt since Robin trusted him enough to reveal her secret, maybe he could confide in his own jumbled up mess of uncertainty. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Drying the glass sundae bowls, Steve finds himself in deep thought, “Hey Robin?” Steve mumbles loud enough for her to hear (but of course she can hear him mutter incoherently under his breath from the back room). She hums, indicating that she was listening as she wiped down the counters, and Steve shelves the dish. “Can I talk to you about something?”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“When <em>aren’t</em> we talking about something, Harrington?” Robin teases. She turns around and sees the concentrated crease in his brow, “What’s up?” </p><p class="MsoNormal">Steve looks up, bouncing the cloth in his hand, “I uh,” he starts off hesitantly. He clears his throat and checks his surroundings to make sure no one was around, “I think I…think I might like someone I never really expected to be interested in.” He says simply.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Annnd who may that be?” Robin asks as she finishes up the counter. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Steve looks around again, worry glimmering in his eyes, “You can’t tell anyone.” He says.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robins scrunches her face in confusion. Because, okay? “Um, sure.” She agrees. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“I’m serious Rob,” Steve points at her with the cloth in in his hand, “what I’m about to say cannot leave this parlor or shared with anyone else.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Steve –“ </p><p class="MsoNormal">“I’m serious, Robin!”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Okay! Will you just say it instead of making a big deal about it?” Robin asks. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Well it <em>is</em> a big deal –“</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Then just <em>say it –</em>“ Robin exasperates impatiently. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“I think I like Billy.” Steve blurts out, interrupting and leaving her frozen in place, speechless with her mouth open.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“…Come again?” She says, wanting to hear her friend repeat what she thought he said. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“I know you heard me – you hear everything remember?” Steve says. He puts his hand on his hip and leans against the counter, shaking his head, “I dunno what to do.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin comes back to life and blinks, unscrambling unidentified confusion, “What do you mean? About what, exactly?” She asks as she walks closer to Steve. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Just – everything!” He summarizes. “How, why, when…if I should be his friend still. Like what am I supposed to say or act around him now that I – I mean I still like girls –“ Steve begins to explain frantically.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin catches movement out of the corner of her eyes, “S-steve? Lower your voice.” Robin insists. The few remaining food court employees walked past the shop to exit the mall. </p><p class="MsoNormal">“–but I like him too. So, what does that mean? Do I like guys too, or just him? Can I like both, or is this just a phase?” Steve continues in the same tone. “I’m just so fucking confused, dude.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robins waves her hands to get Steve’s attention, “Okay first of all, <em>chill.</em> Okay? I say this as your friend, please relax. I’m here to help you, ‘kay? So just, one thing at a time, yeah?” She guides Steve to grab his things so they can lock up and walk out together to resume their conversation; more so to avoid potential lingering ears. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Out into the parking lot, they walk together to Steve’s car, “Okay, first question: what makes you think you like Billy in a romantic sense?” Robin asks him.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“I – I dunno. It’s no different from how I get interested in a girl. He’s…fun, clever, <em>smart</em> surprisingly,” Steve says, thinking hard to see what qualities he sees in him. “I mean, ever since he got here I’ve been interested in him.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“What do you mean by that?” Robin asks.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Just y’know – the way he carries himself. His charm. Good looks. Like when we played basketball together, he…he has this spark, y’know? Like, he’s also entertained by me. Like I get riled up, but I laugh it off because I give him credit for succeeding.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin doesn’t understand at all what Steve’s trying to say, but from the looks of it, Steve is trying really hard to articulate what he sees and feels for Billy.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“And then lately, we’ve been hanging out a lot. Right? And I find myself wanting to be around him more.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“And you’re attracted to him, yes?”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Pfff, who <em>isn’t</em>? I mean, besides you, of course,” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Thanks.” Robins deadpans.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“But yeah I mean, he’s a good looking guy. He looks better without the ‘stache but, his long curly hair is cute. Especially when he just wakes up.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“I’m sorry, <em>what?</em>”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Oh, it’s not – it’s not like that. Y’see, I went over to his house one morning, to see if he’d help me change the oil on my car. And when I knocked, he answered and Jesus,” Steve whistles, “he’s – “ he gives an “o.k.” sign and gives a kiss. “<em>Bon.</em>” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Is that the only thing you remember from French class?” Robin asks.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Shut up. Anyway, what I mean is…yeah…” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah?” Robin repeats.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah…Yeah I like him. Like that…like how you like Tammy.” Steve says softly, shoving his hands in his sailor shorts. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin smiles lopsidedly. It was cute to see Steve like this. “And so now you’re wondering what your crush on Billy makes you since you still like girls.” Steve nods and Robins sighs. “Let’s get in the car and go for a drive. My mom is working the double shift at the hospital tonight. And I’ll explain to you what your situation may mean to you now.”</p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin took the liberty in telling Steve that guy because he has a crush on Billy didn’t <em>have</em> to mean he was gay. Sometimes when discovering yourself, some things can be questioning enough to experiment with what it is that you’re questioning. She gave the old college example: nearly everyone in college is hooking up. Whether it be girl on guy, girl on girl, guy on guy, orgies, whatever. The point was, even if you enjoy same sex sexual activity, those acts don’t necessarily make you gay, bisexual, or lesbian. One could be straight if one desired to be. Orientation identity weighs differently with everyone. </p><p class="MsoNormal">So when the question of Steve being attracted to guys or Billy, Steve seemed to only be focused on Billy. Because he struggled with picturing himself with a nondescriptive imaginary person he didn’t know. But Billy was enough for now. “You can still be attracted to both, Steve. It’s called being bisexual. Y’know, like David Bowie.” She explained.</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Huh…” Steve hummed to himself. He taps his thumb on the steering wheel with the term sinking into his thoughts. </p><p class="MsoNormal">Robin couldn’t stop smiling the entire drive with Harrington. She was proud of him for many things tonight. For thinking for himself, for trusting her to discuss this and being brave about it. When she told Steve, she was scared. She would never admit that to him but, it terrified her. To put all her trust into one person who knew her secret. Well – two, really. But Billy had an advantage; he <em>knew</em> what the ring on her middle finger meant. And as he sported the same accessory, they had to trust each other. And that was something she withheld from Steve – for the sakes of Billy’s privacy.</p><p class="MsoNormal">And that was another reason she was smiling. These two dinguses were totally into each other and it would only be a matter of time before they figured things out for themselves. </p><p class="MsoNormal">They pull up to Robin’s empty home and Steve can’t help but sigh, nervous and doubt gnawing at him. “Steve,” Robin places her hand on Steve’s shoulder, “whoever you like doesn’t change who you are. Remember that. And it’s not uncommon to have a crush on your friends. So, try not to worry about it too much. Alright?”</p><p class="MsoNormal">“Right…” The tightness in Steve’s chest has gone away, but one worry remains at the forefront of his mind. “Now I guess I have to figure out how to act normal when we go on our little road trip.” </p><p class="MsoNormal">“You’ll be fine. I just know it.” She offers a comforting smile. “I’m gonna head inside. See you next week.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I have a few more events to add within the next few chapters, as well as editing them. I'd say at this point we're about...almost 3/4 of the way there? Idk, I'm trying not to drag it out with inconsistent chapter lengths but - just look forward to the next chapter, hint hint wink wink.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You sure this is a good idea?” Max asks from Billy’s bed as she watches her stepbrother raid his drawers. “Driving to California with Steve.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The older teen sighs, “It’ll be fine,” Billy says for the fifth time. “Not like anything’s gonna happen. We’re just friends, remember?” He reminds her. He looks turns around to find uncertainty written all over her face. “What?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max jumps a bit, “Oh I – it’s nothing.” She answers quickly. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy grits his teeth and shuts the drawer hard to straighten up, flexing his jaw, “What? You think I’d do something? Is that it?” He questions her. Max‘s guilty expression is enough of an answer and immediately regrets thinking such thoughts.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Sorry.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy flips over a shirt he has in his hands into a haphazard fold, “Forget it…” He mumbles. Billy knew he was a lot of things, but he would never force himself on someone. Terrible memories of his parents fighting in their bedroom, followed by muffled cries, and his mother’s tear streaked face and bruised freckled skin were all embedded in his mind. It wasn’t until later that he learned about marital rape after piecing the puzzles together.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I just don’t want you to torture yourself by being around someone you can’t have,” She adds. Max knows it doesn’t help or recover what Billy called her out on. The awkward silence is killing her, and she doesn’t know how to convey her concern without sounding…well, the way she was sounding… unintentionally.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Can I ask you something?” Max blurts out. Although Billy doesn’t turn to her or asks her what’s on her mind, Max takes his silence as his way of listening anyway. She lifts her legs one by one to put her hands under them to get comfortable, “It’s kinda personal but,” she takes in a slow deep brave breath, “you’ve always brought girls home and you do stuff together. And now that you like…Steve…I guess I’m confused of like, what your deal is. Do you like girls <em>and</em> boys or…have you just been with girls because of your dad but always liked boys?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy zips up his bag and turns around to throw it on the bed, barely missing Max’s face. He exhales a deep breath, wondering what the best approach to explaining all of this to Max. “The latter. But…I don’t think my Dad <em>actually</em> suspected me being, y’know,” <em>Christ I can’t even say the word without feeling guilty</em>, Billy thinks. Neil had made gay, queer, faggot, and homosexual dirty epithets that made Billy feel ashamed of himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“He just wanted to make sure I don’t. To him, if I did – or, am, it’d be like he failed as a Father. As a man. Would probably blame it on my Mom but ultimately be at fault no matter how much he would deny it. But…” Billy sits down next to Max, “I dunno…as much as you may not want to hear this, it felt good being with them, the girls. And they’re not half bad looking either. But the whole time was just for show, to prove that I’m not…and I would think about whatever to finish.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max wants to gag and die because it’s Billy and totally too much information, but she doesn’t. It was natural to – to – think about and have sEx. <em>Ugh.</em></span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“So then you’re forsure into Steve.” Max says definitively.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy nods, “Yeah. Having to pretend with girls is fucking exhausting.” He admits outright. It takes Max by surprise with the way he says it, but it has her attention. “I know you think I’m a narcissist, and I am a bit conceited, but I know how I look. And it’s what gives me attention in the first place. So, whenever I need something, I just flirt to get what I need. Like that night I went looking for you? I went to Wheeler’s house and saw Mrs. Wheeler and,” Billy rolls his eyes and sighs, “God…she – she answered the door in her fucking <em>robe</em>. Who does that, y’know? I was surprised but when I saw that same look everyone has when seeing me on her face, I played into it. Paid a few compliments and got Byers’ address. When I went to the car to drive over, I was so fucking done from having to talk to three different women before; pitching the same shit again and again.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The way Billy speaks of that night tells Max everything she needs to know about how serious he was about his reputation versus his genuine interest in Harrington. “That sounds shitty…” Max sympathizes in a low whisper. She’s seen women in the workforce doing similar stuff in providing “quality customer service with a smile”. Extending emotional support, kindness, comfort, and timely convenience are essential. And if you’re an attractive woman? The expectation to take no offense to harassment and flirtation was implied as well. And…in a <em>way</em>, Billy experiences the same thing all to maintain this image for the sake of his safety under Neil’s roof. It made sense, despite being incredibly fucked up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well, if it means anything, I hope you and Steve have a good trip.” Max knocks her shoulder into Billy, smiling at him. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He doesn’t say anything, but his expression softens slightly enough for Max to notice. He bumps his shoulder into hers, “Thanks shitbird.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With their own small bags packed, they take Steve’s car and hit the road before sunrise. They kept the radio on blast and only stopped for gas, food, and coffee. They made a great team; the co-pilot handed over burgers, napkins, and shifted the gear stick for the other while eating and steering the wheel. They would tag team out and take turns driving; sometimes the other will drift into a nap to rest up and continue their day and a half drive.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span>Billy teased Steve with how many pictures he was taking of San Francisco. He humored the teen Indiana native with a full day of sightseeing, as they were ahead of schedule by a full day. <em>“Why would anyone want to ever leave this place for the shithole that is Hawkins?”</em></span> <span>Steve wondered. Everything about this place was amazing. It was cleaner than the inner city of Chicago, friendlier, tanner, blonder. The view of the water too was just – waah! Amazing! Steve couldn’t blame Billy for missing California as much as he did; whether it was the whole state or wherever he was from. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When the night of the concert finally came, Steve definitely felt out of place waiting in line at the Inn. But whatever, he was here in fucking California to see one of the most iconic rock bands of the fucking century. Loads of people were traveling all over the fucking country and internationally to follow them and see their show. Who gave a shit what other people thought. By the time they got in, clear cups of beer were shoved into their hands by total strangers who were already plastered. It was so loud and fast that Steve could barely make out what Billy was shouting in his ear.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It’s truly a fucking miracle Steve and Billy stayed together throughout the whole night. They drunkenly stumble and laugh their way out of the Inn together, barely hanging onto one another by the clutch of their stretched-out collars of their shirts. Neither of them can understand what the other is saying despite how much they yell due to the ringing in their deafened ears from the blaring music. When they finally reach the parking lot a few blocks down, it takes several minutes for Steve to slot his key into the driver’s door to unlock the car while Billy nags at him to hurry the fuck up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When the doors unlock, Billy rips the rear passenger door open so fast he smacks his head with a loud thud, causing Steve to fall to the ground cackling at Billy who groans as he climbs into the back seat. But when Steve gets up to join his friend, krama trips Steve to lose his footing and he too smacks his forehead into the frame of the open car door. God damn drunken depth perception. Steve glares at Billy who is laughing his ass off and decides to tackle him to give him something to laugh about.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They wrestle around in the back seat laughing and yelling as they throw the other into the hard seats. Their playful banter quickly dies down with heavy panting from all the physical work of trying to dominate the other. Propped against the seat, Billy and Steve smile and stare at each other as they try to catch their breath. And there’s…something, felt between them in that moment. Their expressions soften and their eyes studying carefully looking over each other slowly, almost hesitantly, drift down to their lips and back up again. A breath of anticipation is all that is heard before they lunge for each other hungrily, hands cupping the other’s face to stay in place with no escape. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Almost everything about the kiss is familiar with Steve. The warmth, the unsurprisingly soft lips, the nip of teeth against his own bottom lip. He can’t help but gasp when Billy bites him and how quickly Billy took that opportunity to stick his tongue inside. It’s not only familiar, it feels good. Really good, in fact. The only difference is the ticklish brushing of Billy’s mustache, which reminded Steve of who he was kissing. He wasn’t kissing Nancy or Laurie, or Amy, or Becky. No, he wasn’t kissing a <em>girl</em>. He was kissing <em>Billy</em> – a <em>boy</em>. And that…did not change anything for Steve. It was nice. The comfort was nice. Nothing they were doing was “bad”. Just…different. This realization made Steve sober up a little to try to commit what he could to memory.And since they’d been drinking, he had to make cognizant decisions of what may happen next.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Caught up in his own rush of thoughts Steve’s caught by surprise when Billy pulls him into his lap, tugging him by the neck of his shirt and moaning happily from their sloppy exchange of kisses. This is a move Steve is also familiar with. It means to keep going, don’t stop, and he intends to abide by such physical implications. It was an unspoken understanding and set of permissions to explore each other with curious hands.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It’s the creaking of car axels that alerts Billy of what’s happening. Coming out a slight daze, Billy first realizes someone is kissing him. And kissing him damn good at that. Their lips are soft, full, and taste of beer. Or that could be all what Billy can currently taste. But whatever, Billy’s bagged someone for the night. Curious to know what cutie he’s landed in his inebriated state, he notices something else: they’re in his lap. Smiling, Billy places his hands on their denim clad thighs, squeezing them out of appreciation. And to Billy’s pleasant surprise, those thighs under his palms were firm. Something about that made Billy all the more interested about tonight’s partner. Reaching back around them he grabs a shapely ass and smirks to himself. So far, from what he can tell, they were his type – or at least as close to his ideal type as he could get. Billy hums when he feels a warm hand on his stomach, pleased that things were moving as quickly as they were. But when Billy gives an appreciative squeeze, he hears a groan that sounds deeper than expected.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He cracks open his eyes and is shocked to his core to find Steve Harrington is in his lap, hand running up along his side under the tour shirt he’d just gotten. And he – Steve – Steve’s kissing him. And Billy – Billy’s letting him and kissing back, and two things happen. First, Billy feels his pants tighten between his legs. Learning Steve was the one in his lap and kissing him gave him instant wood. And two, panic sets in. He feels an immediate urge to repel away because of his new tented situation. His indoctrinated self thinks it’s out of disgust but a deeper part of him silences the overcompensated hysteria; it’s fear of exposure. Fear of someone passing by will see and know what they were doing. Fear that, somehow, Neil would find out. Billy whines against Steve’s lips, placing his fists against his chest to gently push him off, “Wait – “he manages to mumble, “wait, Steve. Steve! Stop. S-stop, stop.” He tells Steve, making him pull away.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve leans back, “What’s wrong?” he asks, panting from excitement. He keeps his hand on Billy’s side, swiping his thumb side to side over the warm tanned skin. He stills when he looks at Billy’s face, completely petrified, “What’s wrong?” Steve asks again, with more concern behind his tone. “Did I – is this not…?” he trails off, heart sinking into his stomach. Did he misread the situation? Did he really jump the gun on this? He pulls his hand away from Billy like the warm skin burned. Steve gulps, wetting his lips with his tongue, “I’m sorry,” he stutters, “I-I thought – “</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Steve,” Billy interrupts him, grabbing his arms, “you did nothing wrong,” he assures him. “I’m just…” He tightens his grip, trying not to move too much to bring attention to the bulge in his jeans. Billy struggled to get his voice to work – he was scared for several reasons, but to admit to that was fucking lame.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s brows twitch in a quick furrow, “…You nervous?” He asks Billy gently, who gives a jerky nod. Steve shifts in Billy’s lap to sit back and give him space, to which Billy winces from the slightest friction that felt embarrassingly good.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I,” Billy starts, unsure of how to explain without offending Steve or blowing up into an asshole. It was a lot of reasons but where to begin was lost in the entanglement of his mind. He grunts out of frustration because it should be <em>obvious</em>. “We’re drunk and…I don’t think we should be doing this.” He deflects. Which is an unfair excuse, and Billy can see the hurt on Steve’s face. “I-I mean, Christ, Harrington c’mon I haven’t done this.” <em>You mean you’ve never given into temptation,</em> the voice in his head tells him. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It takes Steve a minute for his brain to catch up and translate what Billy had just said, or rather what he meant. He knew Billy had kissed and fucked plenty of times before. So for this to be so different, he realizes Billy meant he hadn’t done this with a <em>guy</em>. “Oh,” Steve finally says. They’re quiet for an awkward moment until Steve opens his mouth to take in a sharp breath, “right, well – of course but if it makes you feel any better, neither have I,” he offers, “but with you it…I don’t worry about that. I’m not worried about it.” ‘That’ meaning the negative connotation to their intimacy, the “bad” Steve thought of before. It’s Billy’s turn for his brows to twitch, confused by what Steve had just said, like he didn’t believe him. “I’m serious,” Steve says honestly, “you…I dunno. I’m not worried about what we’re doing, how it looks, what it means, or what others may say or think. All I know is that…I really like this. A-and you. I like doing this <em>with</em> you.” He confesses in a sweet stammer and with vulnerability in his eyes.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy <em>swears</em> his heart skipped a few beats. Did his ears betray him? He wants to blame the alcohol for all of this but, Billy’s more than aware of how very real this whole thing is. Neither of them could deny it or play it off as something else. Billy’s mind is racing a million miles an hour trying to make sense of it all. He didn’t expect any of this to happen. Not for Steve to be in his lap kissing him, to actually agree to take him up on a road trip, to be <em>friends</em>. Billy thought he would be able to stuff down his attraction like he had once or twice before. And yet here Steve Harrington was sharing his (mutual) attraction. So for it all to come to fruit is – a pleasant surprise. <br/><br/></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Or at least it was.</span>
  
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy realizes too much time has passed to answer because Steve looks dejected and already moving away. “Look uh,” Steve looks away to cough to hide his embarrassment, “we should uh, get goin’ huh? Make our way back to Hawkins?” He suggests with a sad smile. Before Billy could stop him, Steve climbs out of the back and into the driver’s seat. Steve sniffs loudly, awakening the much-needed sobriety to prepare for the drive. Billy slams the back of his head against the back of the seat and running his hands roughly over his face, mentally cursing himself for being a fucking idiot. He adjusts the front of his pants before finally climbing to the front to join Steve. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re too drunk to drive, Harrington.” Billy mumbles.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m fine,” Steve replies back, “I didn’t drink nearly as much as you did tonight. Let’s go.” Billy can’t find it in himself to say anything else so, he doesn’t. Instead he feels ashamed. For what exactly he doesn’t know, his head hurts and chest aches far too much to make sense of it all.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>There's more i swear!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*eye brow waggle*</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">They didn’t speak that night they left California, or for most of the drive back for that matter. The turn and burn added to the tension between them, and it would make them snap if either of them dared to bring up <em>the other night.</em> So to avoid it, they limited their conversation to getting food, gas, or sleep. And it was gnawing away at Billy. He couldn’t fucking take it anymore. He agonized over the ways he could approach the situation. And of course, that came with internal conflict of what exactly all of what happened in ‘Frisco had meant.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It was late at night and Billy was behind the wheel. They had about three hours until they reached Hawkins and he knew it was now or never to come clean. With Steve still sleeping against the window, Billy pulls into the last motel in outskirt of Chicago. He gently shakes Steve awake, who asks if they were already home. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“No,” Billy answers in a soft whisper, “figured we sleep in a real bed for a few hours before making it back.” He can tell Steve is still half asleep and agreeing to whatever he had to say. “Come on, get out the car.” Billy grunt as he helps Steve out and kicks the door behind him to their room on the ground floor.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">He manages to get inside and gracelessly plops Harrington on the bed. Steve groans and sighs as he stretches out on the bed, keeping his eyes closed. Billy catches a glimpse of temptatious skin thanks to Steve’s shirt pulled up a bit of ways. That same skin he remembered he touched a few days earlier. His sensibility becomes intrigued and nearly persuaded by his own shoulder devil to risk it all and relive that night again. So, Billy forces himself to turn and walk away. He freshens up in the bathroom and tries to take his time before returning to the bed with Steve still sprawled out. “Move over, Harrington,” Billy taps Steve on his shoulder. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“’S my bed,” Steve grumbled sleepily with creased brows and eyes still closed.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy sighs, “This was the only option we had. Now move over.” He says firmly. Steve huffs and rolls over, kicking off his shoes as he does. “How can you sleep in jeans? You psycho,” Billy comments, earning a grunt from Steve who apparently is too tired to care what he’s sleeping in. In his undershirt and boxers, Billy keeps to his side as close to the edge as he can to not be tempted like he nearly was earlier. The only thing ha can hear is the shitty A/C rattling to keep the room cool, but it doesn’t drown out the loud beating of his heart in his ears. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">And although Billy had gotten the room for them to sleep, he was laying there wide-awake staring at the ceiling. He keeps looking at the clock to see what time it is and every time he does, no more than 10 minutes have gone by. Billy sighs loudly out of frustration.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Can’t sleep?” Billy hears a sleepy Steve mumble, barely audible he almost misses it. Billy jerks in surprise to learn Steve was awake.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Uh…yeah,” he answers, “how long you been awake?” </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Since you made me get out the car,” Steve sighs and rolls over to look at Billy, “how big is this bed? A small full?”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“That’s not a thing, Harrington,” Billy says, “and I already told you this is all the motel had available.” He backs up a little, feeling they’re far too close. “One of us can sleep on that shitty couch or the gross floor.” He offers, eyes roaming over the brunet. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Nah, ‘s fine.” Steve says, covering his mouth to yawn. He sniffs and blinks to see the street light filtering through the vertical blinds of their room. He looks right into Billy’s eyes. “Hm…”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“…What?” Billy asks, face growing hot from the was Steve was looking at him. Why was he looking at him like that? With those soft Bambi-like eyes and equally soft voice. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Your eyes are brown from the orange light outside. They look like honey.” Steve mutters. And the way he continues to look at Billy makes the blond stone still, waiting for whatever comes next. But instead, Steve goes on to add, “But normally they’re like, a clear blue sky.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy is breathless for a moment. That has got to be the most romantic shit he’s ever heard. Despite their awkward drive back, Steve sounded totally enamored with admiration. Billy could – “Kiss you.” Once the words leave his lips, Billy freezes. <em>Shit.</em> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve doesn’t blink, surprised by the unexpected blab from Hargrove.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy begins to back pedal and try by some miracle to cover this up, “Shit, Harrington, I mean I– “ </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“– Wanna kiss me.” Steve interrupts.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“– ah, n-no – “Billy stammers. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Y’sure?” Steve asks, trying not to show or sound how much he was enjoying teasing Hargrove. “Kinda sounds like you do.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy opens his mouth to retort smartly but nothing comes out and it only makes this smug son of a bitch Harrington grin. “Look – “ </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve scoots in closer to cut Billy off, “What do you mean then?” He asks, gaze locked on Billy’s. “Just now. Back at Ruth’s. What…” Steve shakes his head, unsure of what to even think for himself, “Billy you can be honest with me. I told you how I felt back then and – “</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You were drunk, Steve.” Billy reasons. <em>So were you, hypocrite,</em> Billy reminds himself. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah. Yeah I was but I meant what I said if I still mean it now.” Steve counters. And it’s his counter than makes Billy sigh, still hesitant to level honestly with the other. “You know, in my experience, people tend to be a little more honest when they’ve been drinking. And that night, something happened between us. You know it just as well as I do.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve brings his hand up and slowly reach overs the space between them to rest his hand on Billy’s. “Listen,” he starts off softly, “I get why you wanted to stop that night. I do. I get it if you, y’know, wanna keep that between us. Even, potentially <em>this</em> between us. I know you don’t want anyone else to know if we…” Steve trails off, not wanting to say too much out loud and scare Billy. He doesn’t want to leave what he’s just said opened ended, but with Billy’s understanding affirming nod to continue, Steve does, “But, if you want to pretend none of this ever happened…well, I gotta be honest with you, it won’t exactly be easy for me to do that.” And it’s the look on Steve’s face and the sincerity in his voice makes Billy cast his eyes downward, unable to bring himself to look at Steve. He remembers when Harrington and the Wheeler girl broke up and what their relationship did to him over the remainder of their senior year. And he <em>loved</em> her. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Steve,” Billy sighs, “I dunno why I did what I did back there,” <em>Liar,</em> “but with what you’re saying? I’m not exactly the boy next door kind of boyfriend your mother would approve of. I mean shit Steve I haven’t even been in an actual relationship. All I would do is piss you off and regret this ever happened. You deserve better than that.” Everything Billy had learned about being a partner wasn’t exactly posed by the best example. Billy always held disinterest in being someone’s boyfriend because of his nasty habits. Steve didn’t need to experience that for himself; he’s went through enough with Nancy from what Billy could tell.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“God,” Steve scoffs, rolling onto his back and holds his forehead with his free hand, “I’m so fucking sick of everyone telling what I supposedly deserve.” He mutters in frustration. It was if he would never be able to escape those words whenever he expressed what he wanted. Steve feels Billy hold his hand tighter and turns to look at him. He realizes his tone was harsher than he intended and not meant directly toward him. “Hey,” Steve rolls back on his side, leaning in closer than he was just a moment before, “I didn’t mean you. It’s just, you’re a better person now than you give yourself credit for. And I see that. You deserve that more than anyone.” He swipes his thumb back and forth over Billy’s knuckles. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy can’t work the lump out of his throat. His emotions betray him and fight against his trained face and reveal themselves through a displeased frown and teary eyes. He <em>can’t </em>and shakes his head.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve slumps a bit, “Then what are we doing here?” They both knew Billy could’ve made the rest of the drive home. Hell, right now they would be halfway home if they hadn’t stopped and <em>Billy </em>had gotten them a room. Although Steve was right, it makes Billy feel caught and makes him want to run away. Originally, he brought Steve here in hopes of apologizing and coming to terms with his feelings toward the brunet. You know, when he thought he had the courage to do so. But now? Steve was proving how smart he really is with jumping to points Billy was going to gradually get to. Steve took the reins of their conversation and Billy had zero control of the pace at which they were going and that’s what made him want to flee and never look back. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But he doesn’t.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">He doesn’t because there’s something that bothers him more than anything in this whole situation: the fact that Steve Harrington <em>wanted </em>to try to make it work in whatever capacity. Commitment and love were tainted for Billy because he’s damaged goods – corrupted and hard to love. He was a fuck up, and mean, and a coward to do this. A coward to give in to his desires and be with another man. He didn’t want to hide or keep anything a secret, but with these times? Openly gay couples were targeted and beaten to death. Billy didn’t want any of that for Steve. It wouldn’t be fair to the boy who had so much to give. Therefore, Billy truly felt undeserving of Steve. “Why’d you invite me, Billy? Why’d you bring me here?” Steve asks again, desperate to know where to go from here. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Something snaps in Billy. The chain of restraint breaks and incomes the wrecking ball of truth crashing into his own brick wall fortress. He doesn’t think about what he does next, seeing as Steve has laid everything out for them, and kisses him.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy reaches up to cup Steve’s face and kisses him firmly with tears streaming down his face. It feels like an eternity has passed by the time he pulls away just enough to look at Steve – but he doesn’t get far. Steve pulls Billy back in for another kiss and closes the remaining space between them, chest to chest. A rush of endorphins courses through Billy’s veins with solidarity of being wanted. Finally giving into one’s desires felt satisfyingly freeing. And because they wanted each other, worry and judgement left Billy, and his confidence dared him to deepen their kiss with the slip of his tongue. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">While Steve lets Billy take the lead in their passionate exchange of kisses, he runs his hand down Billy’s broad back to his waist, over the curve of his hip, behind his ass, and along his strong thigh. Billy was so – so – <em>sexy</em>, wearing his muscle shirt and boxer briefs. With how fiercely Billy’s kissing him, Steve grows eager to show his appreciation. He grabs the back of Billy’s leg and drapes it over his side, caressing him to keep them close at the hip. Steve incidentally rocked into Billy and elicits a moan from him. Steve knows the familiar sound is good, pleasurable to Billy, so he does it again. He rolls his hips firmly against Billy once more, wanting to hear those pleasant noises again. And he does.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Everything about this feels familiar to Billy, yet unlike he’s ever done. Familiar in the sense of previous encounters, but unlike since…this was not what Billy viewed himself as. Accepting that he’s gay was one long struggle. However now, following his own desires and instincts, he realizes he’s currently acting the “feminine” role. It should bother him, or at least he thinks it should, except it doesn’t. But the other night when they were like this, he wasn’t. Maybe it could go both ways. What was the word…<em>versatile</em>? Switching, to be exact. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Yeah.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">With a firm grip of Steve’s shirt, Billy pulls him on top as he rolls on his back. He finds Steve’s weight comforting and rests his parted legs on either side of him to cling and embrace him closely. Billy hums into their kiss when he rocks up the mattress with another roll of Steve’s hips. He nudges and squeezes his thighs against the teen above to keep him rutting against him. God, humping was juvenile, but shit it felt nice. Billy felt better knowing he was doing this with <em>Steve Harrington</em>. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy welcomes large hands slipping beneath his shirt and up alongside his ribs, feeling him up and squeezing his chest. Steve moves to the side to mack on Billy’s neck, and Billy listens to Steve’s heavy breath, excited and in a hurry to get his mouth on other places. His own breath hitches when Steve pushes his shirt up and gasps when he feels the kisses jump to his chest. He feels the pendant fall into the divot at the base of his throat. His heartbeats harder and louder the lower Steve goes, and Billy prays that Steve doesn’t come across his hardened nipples from goosebumps that rippled through him. “Nn!”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Too late. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve’s latched onto one of them sucking lightly and flicking his tongue over the bud. It makes Billy flinch, arching his chest into Steve’s mouth as if he were silently asking for more. Then Steve nips him, “Ah!” Billy sharply gasps, hissing right after. “Easy, Harrington.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You like it,” Steve insists, laving over his mark. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“What makes you so sure?” Billy retorts. He grunts as Steve firmly palms his crotch. Oh…oh that’s why. He was hard. “Ah well…” he trails off, blushing. When Steve grinds the heel of his palm down again, Billy sighs and his nerves pick up again. “Uh, Steve?”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah?” </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“I uh…I don’t think…” <em>Here we go again.</em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Too fast?” Steve guesses, removing his hand. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Y-yeah,” Billy stammers, “sorry.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Don’t be,” Steve assures him, “I thought – y’know, might’ve wanted more.” </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Apparently he does,” Billy chuckled, looking down at his lap at <em>who</em> really wanted more.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“I’ll ask next time. Check in with you instead, if you want” Steve offers. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy opens his mouth to protest, but his voice of reason stops him, <em>be honest with him.</em> His eyes dart side to side looking at Steve’s eyes and his cute beauty marks. He nods instead of arguing otherwise. “But,” Billy interjects before Steve pulls away completely, “I…don’t mind if we kept doing what we were doing before.”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“What exactly do you wanna keep doing, Billy?” Steve asks, boxing in Billy’s head with his arms and looking down at him. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy feels trapped like that of a caged animal. “C’mon Harrington, don’t make me say it,” he groans.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Y’know,” Steve shifts his weight over Billy, “I like the sound of you saying my first name a lot better than referring me to my last.” He looks right into Billy’s eyes, “Tell me what you want.” </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A shaky breath escapes Billy. For a guy who got knocked around a lot on the court, it was surprising to see him be, dare Billy think, pleasantly assertive. He rests his hands on Steve’s hips, “I want,” he starts, licking his lips, “to keep kissing…”</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“And?” Steve prods, giving a firm playful tug on one of Billy’s runaway curls. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy feels like prey with the way Steve stares him down, eyes filled with curiosity, want, and anticipation. He swallows hard, working the thick lump of nerves down, “Want you tuh…” <em>Fuck I can’t say it.</em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“C’mon,” Steve croons, sensing Billy’s reluctance, so Steve leans in closer, “finish your sentence.” He whispers in Billy’s ear, coaxing the younger man beneath him to reveal his needs. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Still unable to say it, Billy thinks maybe he could show Steve instead, sparing his pride from slight embarrassment. Eyes squeezed shut and hands still on Steve’s hips, Billy pulls Steve’s hips to move, grinding them together. The way Steve groans in Billy’s ear makes the blond too moan in response.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“That what you want, huh?” Steve says, looking to see Billy giving him a shy side eyed glance. Smirking with a satisfied look on his face, Steve gives him a firm kiss on the lips and cards his fingers through Billy’s hair, loosely holding the curly locks. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve rolls his hips, firmly rutting his hard-on against Billy’s. As good as it feels for Steve, the denim desensitizes the whole experience for him, whereas Billy is only in his boxers. It’d feel better for them both to have thinner fabric between them, right? “You mind if I even the playing field?” He asks him, thumbing the denim belt loop of his jeans. Billy shakes his head, helping the brunet out of them in fact.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The jeans catch around Steve’s legs, who growls in frustration and obligates to pull away from Billy to yank them off properly. He hurries in an instant the second they’re off, greeted warmly with thick legs wrapped around him. “Take this shit off,” Billy mumbles against his lips. Billy claws at the offending shirt, pulling at the shirt so hard it stretches and rips some. With it finally off, Billy runs his hands through Steve’s chest hair slowly until they reunite drape around his neck. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve gazed down at Billy’s face, watching his expression. The friction between them now feels a thousand times better than before, and Steve’s honestly impressed with Billy’s outline. It feels so good that thanks to the breeze from air-conditioned room, Steve feels a cold wet spot on his boxers. Or rather, from Billy’s. Eyes squeezed shut, gnawing his bottom lip, and his furrowed brows, it was as if Billy was fighting to withstand the pleasure. That could only mean…Oh…<em>Oh – </em>Billy wasn’t going to last much longer. And if Steve was being honest with himself, the fact that he was the reason behind Billy Hargrove’s sexually concentrated expression stroked his ego. Steve leans down, capturing Billy’s lips and swallowing Billy’s moans, rocking into him earnestly.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">As for Billy, he clings onto Steve trying desperately not to come so soon. A part of him chastises himself because of that. He wasn’t no minute man, so what the fuck? Was it because it’s been a while? <em>It’s because it’s Steve.</em> Nah…no, no, no. No way was that the reason. Yeah sure, they were getting hot n’ heavy, and everything Steve was doing was riling Billy up but, was that all it took now? No that can’t be it. It feels like his first time all over again. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Ah, shit. <em>That’s</em> why…Because Billy finally gave in, this whole experience is that much more sensual.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy’s on the brink of coming and warns Steve with a muffled whine, which the older teen above must understand because he groans and grounds himself into Billy even firmer, quicker thrusts. Billy’s the first to break from the kiss, gasping for air and panting from excitement. And it drives Steve crazy. He buries his face in Billy’s neck, tracing his pulse with his tongue before sucking a deep bruise into it, eliciting an unexpected sweet moan from Billy’s lips. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Covering his mouth with the back of his hand, Billy bites back a moan as he ruins his boxers in an embarrassing record time. Steve is merciful enough to ease up and slow down, but Billy can’t bring himself to look at Steve who’s admiring the little mess he can make out between them.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve feels a little bad for Billy. If he were in his position, he’d be embarrassed too for coming so quick. But at the same time, it was kinda adorable – especially with how Billy’s trying to hide his face from him. “Hey,” Steve pants, moving Billy’s arm out of the way, but he still refuses to look at him. “Hey,” Steve repeats. He gently turns Billy’s face toward him with a light touch and gives him another kiss. “Feel better?” He asks in between kisses. Billy simply nods, returning short brushing of lips. “Let me grab you a towel, yeah?” </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">When Steve leaves for the bathroom, Billy can’t help but continue to feel embarrassed and berates himself for his performance. Not to mention the fact that Steve didn’t even <em>finish.</em> And now, Billy lays there in come covered draws like some kid who just had a wet dream. <em>Real sexy, Hargrove,</em> Billy thinks to himself.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Here. It’s warm,” Steve walks back in with a washcloth in his hand. He offers it to Billy and turns back to the bathroom to give him privacy. Sure they’d shower together before but, considering this was a totally different circumstance, sticking around would be more awkward than helpful. And Billy is thankful for that. He pulls them off – chucking them toward a corner somewhere, cleans up quickly, and wraps himself around one of the bed sheets to go over to his bag for clean pair of briefs. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, Steve isn’t sure if he should finish or just wait for his boner to go away. He didn’t think Billy would be up for helping him out so – <em>God damn it,</em> Steve sighs. Waiting awkwardly in the bathroom was long enough for it to go away on its own and walks back into the bedroom. “You good?” He asks.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah. Yeah I’m good.” Billy answers, watching Steve make his way around the other side of the bed to rejoin him. They sink down deeper in the mattress and lie down closer together like they had before. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“So you did wanna kiss me earlier,” Steve teases, giving Billy a conservative peck on his cheek. He could tell Billy was flustered and hope his own playfulness could convey to him that it was okay rather than saying it out loud.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy turns his face to catch Steve’s swollen lips, “Don’t ruin it Harrington,” Billy mumbles, voice gruff with no real warning behind it. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Did a little more than that now didn’t we?” Steve eggs Billy on, bumping their noses together before giving him another tongue filled kiss. He swallows Billy’s would-be-protests to shut up and card his fingers through Billy’s curly hair to cradle, combing back the locks.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve scoots back from Billy and grabs his hand, wanting to feel the teen’s warmth. “So, not to ruin anything, but just so we’re clear,” Steve says, fingers fidgeting in their grasp, “Where do we go from here?” He asks, hesitant to ask directly about them potentially forming a romantic relationship. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy readjusts himself to look at Steve properly, “You asking if we’re boyfriends since we just made out and laid everything on the table?” He summarizes bluntly. Steve squirms in place and nods, almost looking embarrassed for asking in the first place. Billy smiles and squeezes Steve’s hand, “Is that what you want?” He asks softly, kissing his knuckles.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Steve looks up as if the answer were obvious, “I mean, y-yeah. It – it’d be nice but – if it’s not what <em>you</em> want then…it goes both ways, Billy. It can’t just be me who wants it. I need to know if you want it too.” Christ, Steve would really hate it if they did all that for it to become nothing. Even being fuck buddies would be a no go for him. He has way too many feelings to settle for that shit. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Billy bites his bottom lip. It’s cute how considerate Steve was in all of this: making sure their communication was clear and understood, risks involved, no one sided or harbored feelings. Steve wanted to make sure Billy was for it. For <em>them</em>. And Billy found Steve’s consideration attractive. “Yeah I do,” Billy answers simply It would have to be on the down low for obvious reasons but, it was understood. The way Steve lights up makes Billy’s chest ache. Those bright Bambi eyes and ear to ear smile? Shit he was cute.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Yeah?” Steve celebrates with another kiss. The brunet’s enthusiasm and sincerity told Billy everything he needed to know about him as a person. Steve was genuine, sincere, and sharing his vulnerability. He was wearing his heart on his sleeve. And Billy worried that he would, sooner or later, fuck it all up and hurt Steve worse than Nancy had.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They hit the road again before sunrise to grab shitty fast food breakfast and equally shitty coffee. As they drove, they held hands rested on the gear shift. It was all they needed along with the windows rolled down and the cool summer morning breeze whipping through their hair as they drove the last stretch of road back to Hawkins. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy’s folks had already left together for work judging by the absence of Neil’s truck, which put the teen at ease. His Dad didn’t mind the road trip, or that he was bringing a friend with him. But just the matter of secrecy of him and Steve’s relationship worried him – as if Neil would sniff it out immediately.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright, here we are,” Steve sighs as he pulls into the driveway. “I’m gonna need an oil change again soon after all these freakin’ miles we added to my car.” Steve chuckles. He looks over at Billy and smiles, “I had a really good time, Billy,” he doesn’t reach for Billy’s hand, just in case Max came out suddenly or if a neighbor saw them. But the tone in his voice conveys his sincerity and the tenderness he wanted to share if he could hold Billy’s hand.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And Billy can feel it.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, me too,” Billy replies, smiling and eying Steve in a way that makes him appear that he too is holding back. “Um, I guess…I’ll find out my schedule for next month and get back to you. So that way we can plan to hang out or whatever.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve nods, smiling wide, “Yeah okay. Sounds great.” <em>This is great, he’s already wanting to see me again.</em> Then a sudden reminder pops up in his head, “Oh! Before I forget – since I requested time off, I have the next two days off. But after that I’ll be swamped until the week after next.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy nods and hums, having figured that much already. “</span>
  <span>It’s all good pretty boy,” Billy says, “Same goes for me. As well as being at home, taking care of Max n’shit.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah alright,” Steve hums, “sooo,” he drawls, “can I call you? Y’know like, later?” He asks.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy snorts and shakes his head, “So smooth,” he comments, “got a pen?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve scrambles to find a pen in the glove compartment to give to Billy, who refuses it and instead holds his own hand out, “Gimme yours. If my old man finds out <em>anyone</em> is calling for me, I’m fuckin’ done for.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“O-oh. Yeah. Yeah, sure.” Steve stammers. He does his best to write as neatly as he can, concentrating with his tongue poking out and all. “There,” he says with the click of his pen, “you can read that, right?” Billy looks at his palm and reads the numbers out loud, “Yup! That’s it.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright. Do I need to worry about calling you?” Billy asks in return.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Nah. Folks are hardly ever home. And they won’t think anything of it if they’re home and you call.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well then, don’t hang by the phone.” Billy teases, to which Steve closes his eyes and groans.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“God, you’re such an asshole,” he opens them again, rolling them as he does, “why do I even like you?” Billy winks and lets himself out of the car. “Oh! Shit, uh, one more thing!” Steve shouts, getting back Billy’s attention.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What is it now, Harrington?” Billy sighs in mock annoyance.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Sorry, it’ll be super quick. Uhm,” Steve clears his throat and leans in as close as he can from the driver’s seat to whisper, “Robin sorta know about…well, me liking you and what not. But don’t worry I won’t say anything if you don’t want me to.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy leans down and smiles, “Don’t worry, she already knew I liked you. You can tell her whatever you want. I know she won’t say anything since she’s like me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve blinks and drops his jaw. Was he supposed to defend her and lie or, “H-howww do you know that? And wait what? How does she already know that you like me?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy simply holds up his hand with the ring on his middle finger and wiggles the digit, “Accessory to let others know what team you play for without actually having to say anything.” Billy chuckles at the confusion written all over Steve’s face. “I’ll tell you more about it later, alright? I’m gonna go. I’ll call you later.” He winks at Steve and shuts the door, leaving Steve speechless and muddled.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When Steve sees Billy walk inside the house, Steve pulls out of the driveway and heads to the mall to run and tell Robin everything that had happened. Well, okay – maybe not <em>everything</em> but – fill her in of what happened and find out why the fuck she didn’t tell him about Billy liking him.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He has to wait until she goes on first break to tell her in private. But it’s worth the wait when he sees the pure joy and happiness in her eyes. She squees in excitement for him, la-la-ing out loud to skip over the more graphic details as he tells her what went down.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Meanwhile, Max walks out of her room, eyes full of sleep and grunts her ‘hello’ at Billy, seeing as he’s returned. She asks if the concert was fun in passing. And Billy, who sips his cup of coffee, nods to her question and adds the small fact that he and Harrington are a thing now, Max’s eyes shoot wide open as she nearly breaks her neck spinning around in shock. For nearly 20 minutes she nags him with requests of details and burning questions, all which he ignores for her personal amusement.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Since their return to Hawkins and the school year started, work at the ice cream shop slowed down considerably. Steve found himself bored even with the extra shifts he had picked up. On his way to work he saw a “Help Wanted” sign at the video store. He debated over if he should or even could juggle two jobs at once. The extra cash would be nice, but it would leave almost zero time for him to relax. Buuuut then again, the knuckleheads were back in school, and the kids who worked at the shop worked from three to until the mall closed at nine. Steve couldn’t even sign up for the weekend shift since they would request them. <em>Fuck it</em>, Steve thought, <em>I get off when they show up, I need something to do to kill the time anyways.</em> He knew Billy’s hours shifted since he still had to pick Max up from school. Working two part time jobs would be enough to keep Steve busy, but not too busy to keep him from Billy. Hopefully.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>If only getting the job were easy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Keith hadn’t forgotten how much of a douchebag Harrington had been during high school. He even argued that he already had a job, why need a second one? Steve practically begged the other teen to let him work with him. During their conversation, a couple of the girls browsing said high to Steve, wondering if he was going to start working there too. And when Steve shrugged and looked at Keith, who admired the pretty ladies, he hoped the interested clients would be enough motive to make Keith change his mind and let Steve work there.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And Keith did.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Come back to me with your schedule at scoops and we’ll figure something out.” Steve practically skips out the fucking store and heads to the mall for his shift.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He couldn’t wait for Billy to call him later that night to tell him what he had done today. And luckily for him, he didn’t have to wait at all when he got home. The bright orange burn of a cigarette could be seen in the darkened porch, indicating Billy was waiting for him at the front door. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well this is a nice surprise,” Steve comments as he walks up to the front of the house. He doesn’t dare ruin the unexpected visit with his nagging curiosity of what prompted Billy in stopping by. “Thought I’d get another late-night phone call, but I got something better.” He reaches for Billy’s cigarette and takes a puff.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy smiles, “Well are you gonna let me in or not, Stevie?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve snorts and drops the butt on the ground and stubs the cigarette out, kicking it into a nearby bush. “Well of <em>course</em>.” He says. He unlocks the door, pushing it open for Billy to step in first and follow behind him. Flipping the light switch on, Steve drops his leys in the glass bowl. He watches Billy step deeper into the home slowly, looking around at the large home. “Would you care for a tour?” Steve asks half-jokingly.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy looks over his shoulder with a mischievous smirk on his gorgeous face, “Tour of your bedroom maybe.” He suggests.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Oh.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Steve walks past Billy, getting ahold of his arm as he does, “Well allow me to oblige you.” He replies in a low interested tone. With Bill in tow, Steve takes each step up the stairs with ease on purpose to torture Billy. He knows what his ass looks like in these stupid sailor shorts. And he knows <em>exactly</em> what it does to Billy in his direct view.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And it takes <em>everything</em> in Billy to <em>not</em> reach out and touch him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They slip into Steve’s room, blue light from the pool luminating it just enough maneuver around to reach for the lamp on the nightstand. Steve reaches under the lamp shade to turn it on, only to feel Billy rest his hand on his hip and press against him. Billy reaches over him to roll the switch two clicks to flick the light on. Steve looks at him and is immediately met with those familiar soft pink lips. The way Billy holds Steve from behind makes the brunet lean into his soft embrace and sigh into their kiss.</span>
  <span>
    
  </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy reaches up with his other hand to tenderly cup the side of Steve’s face, wanting him to stay just like this. The kiss is slow and open mouthed, which feels more intimate. The soft wet sounds from their lips and tongue feel that more sensual. Holding Steve’s chin with his thumb, he pauses a moment to appreciate the look he’s caused on Steve’s face, then swipes his thumb across Steve’s plump wet bottom lip, “Cherry jubilee,” Billy says licking his lips to savor the taste of tonight’s dessert.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Eyes hooded, Steve smiles and chuckles softly, “There was a little bit left so…I helped myself to it before closing.” He admits against Billy’s lips. “But you taste better.” He adds. Billy hums and kisses Steve once more, turning him around to hold and kiss him properly. Steve walks them back into his bed, plopping back gracelessly with Billy landing on him with an <em>‘oof’</em>. They laugh at each other as they worm their way up the mattress awkwardly to readjust. Now on the pillows, Billy dips down to resume kissing Steve, laying his weight on him comfortably.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy drifts to the side of Steve’s neck, “I ever tell you how good you look in this stupid fucking thing?” he says hotly against his skin, kissing a beauty mark along the column. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You can tell me again. Make sure my ego hears it.” Steve sighs, hissing when Billy bites his neck. A shiver runs down his back as Billy chuckles deeply in his ear. He turns his face toward Billy’s, meeting his lips for a kiss and inhales sharply through his nose, reaching up to card his fingers through Billy’s thick curly hair.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Missed you,” Billy mumbles, “didn’t want to just call you.” This makes Steve smile. For once someone else was coming over to see him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“That’s very thoughtful of you,” Steve tells him. “I uh, got some news to tell you.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh?” Billy hums, “And what news do you have to share?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I got a second job.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“A second job? Where?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“At Family Video. My hours have been split so, I didn’t want to be at home all day doing nothing.” Steve explains.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hmm…y’sure you can handle it?” Billy asks, brushing Steve’s bangs out of the way.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, totally.” Steve assures him. “There will be times I’m really busy but for the most part I have free time between both jobs. Why? You afraid I’ll be neglecting you?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Maybe.” Billy answers, making Steve laugh. “Now the girls will ogle at you at Scoops and at off brand Blockbuster.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey, Family Video has been around longer than Blockbuster. And besides you’re practically half naked where you work.” Steve defends.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“So? I work at a pool, that’s expected. It’s better than off brand Blockbuster,”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Stop calling it that,” Steve laughs.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Why?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“’Cause it’s not, or whatever.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Definitely whatever.” Billy shrugs, laughing at Steve who sighs in defeat. Steve tries to get Billy off of him by tickling his sides but ends up making Billy hiss and wince in pain.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh shit, sorry. You okay?” Steve asks concerned he’d be rougher than he thought.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s fine.” Billy says quickly, sighing as he straightens up, “Must’ve done something at work.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There it is again. That uncertainty Steve had before earlier this summer when he asked Billy about the scar on his eyebrow. He didn’t want to pry but…”Well be careful, yeah?” Steve asks, having Billy promise him that he will.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>For the first time ever, Steve started looking forward to going home. Before the empty house was eerily quiet, collecting dust here and there, and with nothing on the answering machine either. Though practically empty, Steve found comfort in Billy’s phone calls and his unannounced drop-ins. Billy would never stay the full night, but his visits made Steve feel remembered. Important. Like, his existence was more than house sitting. And it would be more than safe to say that Billy looked forward to them too. The way Billy would snugly wrap his arms around Steve and hold him, face buried and all like he was relieved to see him – Which comforted Steve. Billy was becoming more and more comfortable with him and letting his walls come down, however brief it was. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And in a blink of an eye, Steve couldn’t believe it was December already. So much had happened since August until now. Well, maybe not a whole lot but, enough to impact them both. A level of trust between them grew steadily. Like when Steve learned that Max knew about them, yeah that was a bit scary. Not that he didn’t trust her, but because the only person who really knew was Robin, but it made sense for her to know. Her and Billy’s relationship was better. Still got on each other’s nerves and cussed each other out, but better. And it was clear to Steve that Max would shield them from everyone else. Including Dustin.</span>
  
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And that…ah, well, Steve wasn’t sure what to do with that. Unsure of how well Henderson would or wouldn’t take the news wasn’t something he wanted to risk. Telling Dustin and shit going sideways would go to Mike, who would go to Nancy, and Nancy – no thanks. He felt bad to a degree of keeping something huge from his best buddy but, decided he would tell him at the right time and place. In the meantime, Steve wanted to enjoy whatever time he had with Billy for however long it lasted. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They spent time together at Steve’s house, watching movies, getting high, and slowly exploring their interests. That night in the motel proved to be a heat-of-the-moment thing since Billy had become a bit shy. <em>“I’m embarrassed you saw me like that”</em> he had said. So what if he had been eager, Steve knew he was no better. But it didn’t matter. Billy wanted to take thing slow, which Steve didn’t protest. He was thankful for it actually because if he were being honest, as good as it all felt, he had no fucking idea of what to do if it came to…well – </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>“Butt stuff?” Robin guessed candidly.</span>
  </em>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Oh God,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Steve groaned to himself, shaking the memory away. He vowed to never tell her or ask her for advice like that again. The look of amusement on her face was just – assholerly. The new inside joked cracked together was all to give him a hard time. He laughed of course but…augh, he was <em>definitely</em> not ready for any of that. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>“Yet.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> <em>Robin insisted.</em></span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>a-aNYWAY – </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The time they went to a Halloween party together was nice too. Well, not <em>together</em> at the <em>same time</em> but ya’know, hung out there or whatever. It was a nice change of pace spending time outside of the safe confines of Steve’s house. Steve had offered Dustin to go around trick-or-treating but was turned down. All Billy had done was drop Max off at the cul de sac and told Lucas to have her home no later than 10.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The new Senior class, college tech kids, and graduates all went to a house party dressed up in costume. Steve went as Marty McFly from Back to the Future and Billy went as John Bender from Breakfast Club. There was some exhilaration beating in his chest from pretending not to be so close and restraining the urge to be flirty and couple-y. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They did have to be careful when drinking though – they knew what they were capable of when under the influence; alcohol or weed. Not to mention Robin absolutely refused to go to the party. So, it was a bit challenging to deal with but, they managed. They kept it to smoking cigarettes and betting one another to the keg stand challenge; Billy maintained his title of the Keg King of Hawkins. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They left the party a little before 11 – that’s when noise complaints were prominent and they both preferred not to get caught up with the Hawkins Police to shut down the party. So they had gone to the less than romantic quarry to make out a bit until they both felt sober enough to drive themselves home. It was nice to be out of the house for once.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And now it was practically Christmas.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Snow came early this year and the chilling windy temperatures of Fall dropped significantly. All right after Thanksgiving – which Steve had spent with Dustin and Ms. Henderson. As shocking as the abrupt weather change, Steve was shocked to see Billy continuing to wear his stupid jean jacket. And <em>only</em> his jean jacket. It was downright offense if anything. He had commented on it one night when Billy rented a movie while waiting for Max next door at the arcade. Billy had shrugged it off and didn’t say much about it. Max on the other hand wasn’t so stubborn about it. She’d been bundled up since last year when the California girl complained about the weather if it weren’t anything but a comfortable 75-degrees. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He wasn’t sure what it was exactly, but Steve didn’t like the fact that Billy wasn’t dressing for Indiana Winter. Sure, Billy would wear a hoodie from time to time with his jacket, but that couldn’t be possibly be keeping him <em>warm</em>. It was…well, <em>weird</em> to see Max dressed appropriately and Billy not. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Thinking on it during his shift at scoops, Steve realized earlier this year when they waited for the kids at their dance, Billy was dressed all the same. Now, it wasn’t <em>frigid</em> like it was now but – it was weird. So, then it was decided; Steve would walk around mall after his shift ended to look for something for Billy, seeing as he wasn’t scheduled for tonight at the video store. Which was perfect because he’d been meaning to a little Christmas shopping while sales were at their peak of the season and before he had to go with his parents to Chicago to visit his Dad’s side of the family for the holidays. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He got each of the knuckleheads a small gift in honor of their nerdiness. Even Erica. And though he never thought he’d find himself in a bookstore, Steve got Robin some French novel she had mentioned during one of their shifts together. He couldn’t remember what it was about except that it was French, and about songs, maybe? The lady who helped him offered to throw in a book of poems by Sappho. And sure, yeah, why the hell not, he thinks she’ll like it.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But moving on to Billy – Steve couldn’t just buy any regular jacket. <em>The perfect gift</em> had to meet all of Steve’s standards. It had to be the right color, the perfect fit, low maintenance, and low profile. Now, Steve had an idea of one sweater that met all of those standards, but its low profile was not one of them. Stopping by one of the more higher end stores, Steve weaves through the crowd to the men’s section. He sees a few that he likes, but they’re nothing at all of what Billy would wear. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s looked about everywhere and about to give up until he walks by a floor mannequin displaying <em>exactly</em> what he’s been looking for. Checking the size on it, Steve thanks whatever God and shamelessly pulls it off the display dummy. He has it boxed in store and goes to a kiosk to have it appropriately decorated in Christmas wrapping paper. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Unfortunately for Steve, his plans to meet up with Billy before he left for Chicago were ruined. His parents came home unannounced to surprise him. Apparently, the whole family was going to spend Christmas at some fancy mountain resort in Illinois. And they were leaving tomorrow night after Steve got off work. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Fuck.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey Rob, I need a favor from you,” he tells Robin as she clocks in. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What <em>now</em>, dingus?” She asks as she puts her bag away.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Can I leave this with you?” He hands her a shopping bag containing Billy’s Christmas present. “It’s for Billy. He and I are supposed to meet up tomorrow but my folks’ are dragging me away early for the holidays. I told him to come here after he was done with work to pick this up. Will you make sure he gets it?” He asks her. Steve couldn’t stay on the phone for too long last night. His Mom was an incredibly light sleeper and heard the phone ring. She even got up to see if he was on the phone and why if he was. So, he couldn’t tell Billy everything and hung up abruptly.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin peaks inside and sees a beautifully decorated gift inside, “Wow Harrington, you went all out huh?” She comments.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Robin.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ll make sure.” She says, stowing it away with her belongings. “Anything else?”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, one more thing,” Steve rips open his own backpack and pulls out two books packaged together with ribbon and a crushed bow. “This is for you.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Aww!” Robin accepts it and smiles when she sees the titles of the books on their spines. “Thanks dork.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’ll see you Monday.” Steve waves goodbye as he dashes out through the front to head to the video store to work the next few hours. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As busy as the mall was, the parlor was mostly dead. People stopped by for the store’s seasonal cider, eggnog, and hot cocoa, but that was about it. Robin was slumped over the counter, bored out of her mind, itching to read the books Steve had gotten her. She thought about reading one in secret when – “Buckley,"</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin snaps out of her daydream and sees Billy standing before her. She straightens up and gives a sly smirk, “Hargrove.” She replies. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Merry Christmas,”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Merry Christmas,”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I believe you have something for me?” Billy asks, speaking low as if he were making a drug deal. “Steve told me to drop by –“</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yupp,” Robin interrupts, “gimme just a sec.” She disappears into the back briefly and returns with a white bag and hands it to Hargrove, “here.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy looks at it for a second before accepting it from her. He looks inside and sees a box and some comics, probably meant for Max. “Did he say what it is?” Billy asks Robin.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Nope,” She replies with a pop of the ‘p’, “but I can promise you, whatever it is, Steve gave it some serious thought. Which must’ve been challenging since he has like, <em>a</em> braincell.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy tries to glare at her for insulting his boyfriend but can’t hide the slight smile on his lips. “Thanks Buck.” Robin groans in disgust over the nickname and shoos him away.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What’s that?” Max asks when Billy returns to the car. He had picked her up before stopping by the mall to take her home since she was out for Winter break.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy pulls out the comics and tosses them to Max, “That’s from Steve.” He says. He pulls out his own gift and carefully pulls the ribbon loose and lifts the lid. There’s a note rested on a bed of tissue paper in Steve’s terrible writing.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Did Steve get you something too?” Max asks, curious and excited for her stepbrother. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>“I’m sorry I couldn’t give this to you in person. I promise to make it up to you when I come back. Merry Christmas Billy Goat.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I guess it is,” Max says to herself after reading the note over Billy’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy tries to tame his smile as he folds the note as small as he can and tucks it into his wallet. He plucks out the nest of tissue paper until he sees an expensive looking sweater tucked inside. It was black with a slight turtleneck. Touching it to take it put, the sweater is plush and incredibly soft, and <em>definitely</em> expensive. Billy bites his lip as he examines it carefully. It was definitely nice…okay, maybe Steve had good taste. Curious to know, Billy read the tags lined in garment. <em>Wool.</em> </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh <em>shit!</em> That’s sooo nice!” She carefully touches it, wanting to be part of the wonder.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well I’ll be damned,” Billy mutters to himself. Steve had gone all out for him it seems. A part of Billy felt like he needed to give something of equal value back to him, except – this was something Steve thought of from the heart. Billy shrugs out of his jacket and slips the wool sweater over himself to see how it fits. “Oh wow,” he smooths out the front, looking down to see how it looked, “what do you think?” He asks his stepsister.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Not bad,” Max says with an impressed look on her face. “What’d you get Steve?” Max asks him.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I…haven’t gotten the chance to, y’know, figure it out.” Billy admits.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well it better be something good,” Max tells him, “something that he likes.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy thought about what Steve told him from their past conversations. Nothing really stood out since Steve usually bought what he wanted for himself. “Oh!” Billy snaps his fingers, “He likes those stupid fucking Ewoks,” he says.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“From <em>Star Wars?</em>” Max asks.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah. I know they have like, little teddy bears or whatever at the toy shop.” Billy looks back at the distant, snow covered mall parking lot. It would be fucking weird if he bought something like that. He turns back to Max, “Go in and get it for me.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What? No way it’s cold as shit outside.” Max argues. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’ll give you the money for the bear </span>
  <span>plus</span>
  <span> ten bucks.” Bill negotiates.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max squints at Billy, debating if she should. Or at least pretending to because, damn it, he knew her well. “Damn it,” she sighs, holding out her hand for the cash. “Do you want it wrapped?” </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uhh – “</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“God you’re hopeless.” Max sighs, shouldering her way out of the car. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy had kept the gifts in his car until he was able to sneak in the sweater Steve had bought for him. But when putting Billy’s clothes away, Susan had commented on the sweater over dinner one night, saying how nice and expensive looking it was. And naturally, Neil began to pay attention at this point. Billy spending money on useless shit was something he could always harp on him for.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Luckily for Billy he gave a rational explanation for it. It was fucking cold and he wanted to treat himself to something nice and that it could keep him warm during the unbearable Indiana cold. Neil had eyed him some more because in all honesty, Billy dropping serious cash on <em>one</em> thing was out of character for Billy. Neil didn’t know shit about his son beyond the limits of his behavior at home, but that, made the older man pay closer attention.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The next three days came and went, and Billy wanted to see Steve. Since Steve didn’t have his number, and the number wasn’t listed in the phonebook, Billy had to wait until after Monday’s shift to stop by the video store to return the movies they had rented over Christmas. And – somehow – give Steve his belated Christmas gift. Which was fucking agonizing – Billy had never seriously given anyone a gift before.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And the thought of Steve potentially not liking what he got for him made Billy uncomfortable.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy found his fondness for Steve annoying only because all affection and attraction he had for the older teen had been deeply suppressed, dealing with such tender emotions caused brief moments of his old fake-self want to recoil to his disinterested demeanor he’d grown accustomed to.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Everything was just – <em>so much</em>. More than what Billy thought he could handle. Because yeah whatever, he likes Steve, what’s the big deal? But holy fuck it’s so – much. And that’s really all how he can describe it.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>…But for what it’s all worth, it got him Steve.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy tries not to look too excited when leaving work. He felt a bit childish for how stupid happy he was to finally see Steve. Seriously, three days is fucking <em>nothing</em> compared to…well, anything else, or what was to come. But sue him, this was the best thing going for him at the moment. Billy truly tested himself when he had to walk in casually as he had when he left the community center. <em>Be cool, just fucking calm down Hargrove,</em> he thought to himself. </span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The moment Billy caught glimpse of Steve stacking movies on the shelves, Billy’s heart raced as he opened the door, triggering the store bell that a customer had just come in. And when Steve turns around to see him and smiles – <em>oh fuck just end me.</em></span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey.” Steve greets him in a familiar <em>flirty</em> tone. Subtle, but there. “Returning?”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy forgets Steve is being professional with his customer service treatment and stutters, “Uh – y-yeah,” his thought and voice remembering how to work again. They head over to the counter where Billy hands over the bag with the videos inside. “There’s um, something else,” Billy whispers.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve tilts his head in confusion, wondering what Billy was saying. He looks inside and see there’s a lumpy present in Christmas wrapping. Smiling, he sets the bag down and takes out the stack of VHS tapes, tucking the bag into his cubby under the counter. He can feel Billy watching him, waiting patiently to be spoken to beyond their current employee and customer interaction. He’d be lying if he said Billy’s impatience wasn’t amusing. He finally looks up with a smile, seeing Billy in agony of wanting something, <em>anything</em>, flirty given to him again. “Is there anything you want to check out?” He asks politely.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, you.” Billy answers bluntly, throwing of Steve who blushes at the unexpected answer. Billy leans in over the counter, up close and personal in Steve’s face, “When can I come over again?” He asks with a little bit of desperation in his voice.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Ah – “ Steve stammers for a second, shifting his eyes around to see if anyone was nearby. “W-well – “</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well what, pretty boy?” Billy asks with a cocky smirk. “Can I come over or not?” He continues to press. He’s got Harrington tangled up and there wasn’t a chance in hell he was gonna pass it up.</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve looks down for a second in attempt to regain his control over his flushed face, “Y-yeah,” he finally says to no avail of his rosy cheeks, “tomorrow my folks’ are leaving for New York for a conference. Should be out of town until after the New Year.”</span>
</p><p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The smirk on Billy’s face widens into a pearly grin, “What time should I come over then?”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Join us as Hawkins celebrates the welcoming of the New Year 1986.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>One word: f r o t t a g e</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It was no surprise to Steve that his parents would be leaving for a few weeks once again after their ‘family trip’. Something about conferences in New York dragging through the New Year, blah blah, blah. Whatever. Steve knew his parents would be in New York to stay for the company parties and getting shit faced like they were still in their 20’s. Maybe even more so because Steve was ‘all grown up’ now and didn’t require adult supervision. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Not like he really had any to begin with. They were hardly ever around much the last four years.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Whatever, at least Steve could bring Billy around for their own celebration. Win-win right?</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Tonight they were closing the video store an hour early. Which gave Steve plenty of time to get ready for Billy until he came over. He checked himself out a few new movies for himself for him and Billy to watch over the next few days, picked up some beer and headed home. He patted himself on the back for buying that frozen pizza earlier seeing as he had no time to make that quick errand this late at night.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve ran around his own house like a chicken with its head cut off – showering, baking the pizza, cleaning up here and there (not that Billy cared) and making sure…well shit, he wasn’t sure what he was making sure of. It just – this all felt different somehow. And the only way Steve felt he could get himself to calm down and give himself a sense of (pseudo)self-control was doing all the things he was doing just now. Sue him.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The doorbell rang and it could only be one person who would be coming over this late. Steve jogs to the door and opens it to find Billy luminated by the porch light. “Hey,” he said. Steve also can’t help but notice that Billy’s wearing the sweater he got him for Christmas under his jean jacket. And holy fuck did it look good on him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey yourself,” Steve replies back with a smile, “come in.” He says, playfully tugging Billy in once the blond stepped inside the home. The moment the door shuts Billy’s lips are on Steve’s, getting their fill on the now missed four and a half days of kissing. “Mn y’miss me?” Steve murmured lowly in between kisses.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy has his tongue poking out to lick Steve, “Uh huh,” he hums, feeling the familiar curve of the dumb smile Steve makes when he feels proud or sexually amused. “Is there a problem?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No, no problem here.” Steve answers. He gives Billy what he wants until he’s sated. They stand in the foyer for some time, exchanging kisses and small confessional whispers of ‘I missed you’. “It was only three days.” Steve had said.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah tell me about it.” Billy hums. Those days were too long and torturous without him. “You like your present?” He asks with a kiss.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve can’t help but smile and returns the gesture, “Yeah it’s cute.” The longer they stand there in the foyer the more their intimacy builds. The way Billy feels and grabs at Steve makes the brunet’s breath hitch. He knew at this rate things would get out of hand, reminding him of what he and Robin has talked about before. “C’mon lets go sit down. I got us some stuff for tonight.” Steve tells Billy. He tugs on him some to follow him into the living room where the T.V. displayed a still frame of a movie on pause in the VCR. “Beer? Pizza? Should have cooled down by now.” He adds, taking Billy’s jacket off to hang up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy wanted to complain that he had gained enough weight over the holiday weeks and that pizza was going to push him overboard. But he doesn’t. He knows Steve’s been a little too busy to cook his own meals lately. And besides, not like Steve was giving him a hard time about the barely noticeable pudge in his lower belly anyway.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They were laid out on the couch together; Billy sitting against the couch arm rest and Steve laid against Billy. Steve glances over to the kitchen to read the clock over on the mantel, “Oh shit it’s like a minute til midnight.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah?” Billy says, looking over to where Steve was looking at. “Gonna be my New Year’s kiss, Harrington?” He pokes the older teen, looking down at him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh, <em>yeah,</em>” Steve says in an obvious one, twisting his body to look up at the younger teen, “Why? You got another hot date you need to get to instead, Hargrove?” He asks in mock accusation. Billy laughs and shoves him playfully, telling him to ‘shut up’ and to ‘c’mere’, getting a head start on that New Year’s kiss.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy gently cups Steve’s sharp jaw, tips of his fingers ever so gently pulling Steve in, hoping for the teen to crawl up closer to him. And Steve does. Steve shuffles around Billy’s legs and crawls up to ease his own strain. Billy too had decided to shimmy down the couch flat on his back with Steve above him, kissing away without a care for anything. Except <em>him</em>. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Scorching wide hands roam over Steve’s back and down his waist until they stop to grope his ass. The firm grasp makes him hum appreciatively, responding with his tongue slipping down Billy’s throat in a deeper kiss.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>People in Hawkins welcomed 1986 with celebratory of fireworks popping and crackling in the distance. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The boys smile against each other’s lips, “Happy New Year, baby.” Billy mumbles. He brushes Steve’s hair out of his face, feeling a bit…adventurous. “Let’s go upstairs.” He suggests. He didn’t want to stop but, the couch was growing more and more uncomfortable the longer they stayed and fooled around. Sitting up, Billy lightly bucks Steve out of his lap, grabbing him up and dragging him up the stairs.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Bil-Billy wait,” Steve laughs a bit, trying to keep up with his boyfriend’s excitement. He trips over his own feet taking two stairs at a time and tells Billy, whos’ laughing at him, to shut up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When they reach Steve’s room, he’s practically shoved on the bed. <em>Whoa, what the hell, </em>Steve thought. Billy was…<em>really</em> confident – a total 180 from how Billy was last week. “Whoa!” Steve yelps. Billy is on top of him now, crashing their lips together and pulling off sweater over his head. Something about the kiss seemed frantic and desperate, but for what reason? Steve felt a bit overwhelmed – not that he disliked it but, this felt – well, <em>off.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“H-hey,” He says, “hey slow down.” Steve gently pushes Billy back. “Billy,” finally the blond is listening to him, “what’s gotten into you?” he asks gently. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What do you mean?” Billy asks, panting and trying to resume. But Steve stops him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re being,” <em>how do I say this, </em>“aggressive.” <em>Subtle.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy retracts a bit, “Okay?” he shrugs. He attempts to reach for Steve’s belt is stopped with a loose grip on his wrist.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Billy.” Steve says firmly and brows narrowed, “you’re being rough, dude.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy wants to roll his eyes, but he sighs instead with annoyance. “Stevie,” he starts, “I haven’t done anything. You’re acting like a –“</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Like a <em>girl?</em> Is that it?” Steve asks, finishing the sentence.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What?” Billy screws up his face. “No that’s not what I –“</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Meant? Then what?” Steve interrupts. “What else would it be?” He waits for Billy to honestly screw up with whatever bullshit that he was about to spew. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With that expectant look on Steve’s face, Billy sighs and pulls his hand back. “I’m sorry. I just – “ He stops himself and looks out the window overlooking th backyard and its covered pool. “I just thought you might…” he trails off.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I might what?” Steve asks in a softer tone. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“…be getting bored with me…” Billy says, eyes darting back at him. With the all too familiar look of confusion on Steve’s face, Billy sighs and shifts in his spot. “Aren’t you tired of like…not getting any?” He asks him bluntly. “I know we’re taking it slow or whatever but, c’mon you <em>have</em> to be getting antsy, right?” Billy continues. “I figured if I just <em>made myself</em>, none of it would be, I dunno…”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Scary?” Steve asks. Of course Billy doesn’t agree or disagree because this is Billy he’s talking to. “Billy, I don’t care how slow we’re going alright?” He reaches for his boyfriend’s hand and squeezes it. “I’m intimidated too, okay? Don’t think that you have to do anything to keep me interested. ‘Cause I am. And if I’m not making that clear enough or making you feel pressured, well then I’ll work on that.” He wobbles Billy’s hand to get a reaction. “Got it?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy feels embarrassed and can’t look Steve in the eye. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey, hey,” Steve croons, scooting up to the blond, “hey look at me. Please?” He asks nicely, dipping his head low a bit to see him like a parent does to their child. He gently tilts Billy’s chin up with his knuckle to look at him, and oh those ocean eyes; they make Steve weak every time. “You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for, yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy gives a jerky nod and Steve gives him a kiss. “Good.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Sorry for killing the mood.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve shakes his head in disagreement, “Just a change of pace.” He says. “But uh…is there anything you <em>do</em> wanna try?” he asks, biting his lower lip in some hopes that they added more to their usual in-clothes experience.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Um,” Billy blushes and licks his lip. <em>Yeah he does,</em> Steve thinks to himself. “Maybe we could um, do more <em>under</em> our clothes.” Steve’s brows rose a bit into his hairline.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Oh.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They had talked about this in the past. They were comfortable with making out. Taking each other’s shirts off wasn’t anything unusual for them. Kissing each other’s chest had always been nice. And of course, the humping was still as exciting as ever. Especially when grinding against their ass? Amazing. They couldn’t keep each their hands off each other which made their touch familiar and trusted. But doing more ‘under’ their clothes as Billy mentioned meant removing their boxers all together. And now of course Steve wasn’t sure of it would just be more bumping and grinding but, possibly <em>touching</em> each other’s – ya know – was a big move for Billy in Steve’s perspective.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Instantly getting hard at the thought of that, Steve swallows dryly and nods, “Yeah. Yeah we can totally do that.” He says trying not to seem too eager. But unable to help himself, his fingers skirt along the hem of Billy’s shirt before slipping under the thin fabric and spreading over the tan warm skin. Steve keeps his eyes on Billy, making sure he stays on the same page with him as always. The last thing he wants to do is go too fast and scare him enough to make Billy change his mind. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>A shiver runs up Billy’s spine and goosebumps raise against his skin. It was a simple touch, but it sparked excitement. He lets Steve lift his shirt and take it off and feels those lips on his neck mapping out his most sensitive spots. And Billy didn’t shy from letting Steve know how much he enjoys it with a soft moan.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s just getting started but he lives for the look on Billy’s face. Those blown and hooded eyes, his flushed face, raspberry blooms on his skin from his kiss marks, and the barely audible shudder tells Steve Billy wants more. He brings his hands up and brushes his thumbs over his nipples, “Good?” He asks, earning a nod from him. “Good.” He tilts his head and resumes kissing Billy until he’s breathless. When he pulls away just enough to get Billy to follow him, he pulls the blond as he falls flat on his back against the bed again. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy keeps himself propped up with his arms on either side of Steve’s head, kissing him and settling himself between his legs. He feels Steve’s hand roam down his back and pulling at his belt. He pulls away and sits back on his calves to tug the leather belt through the denim loops. Those baby browns are fixated on his hips, waiting for him to undo the button and zipper there. And Billy makes a show of it. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>His fingertips trace the metal fastener and lip of the jean fly before thumbing them apart with a soft snap. Billy can see Steve bite the inside of his bottom lip, patiently waiting on him to drag the zipper pull. He opens them up and hooks his thumbs in the waistband to push the jeans down past his ass until the bunch around mid-thigh. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve is all over Billy, lunging forward to put him on his back and peel off the jeans for him. Billy’s hooded lust filled eyes gleam with want as he snaps the elastic waistband of Steve’s exposed boxers, “Your turn.” And boy is Steve in a hurry to get his own shit off. He <s>frantically</s> swiftly undresses and hovers over Billy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Still wanna?” He asks tracing Billy’s boxers, referring to finally touch one another. And Billy nods. “Remember, you’re in charge, yeah?” Steve reminds him with a kiss on the top of his head. His eyes don’t stray from Billy’s as his hand dips down under the fabric barrier. His fingers immediately find hot soft skin and traces along the length of its firmness. Steve watches as Billy sighs and fists the comforter beside his head as he wraps his hand firmly around Billy’s length. He pulls it out carefully from its confines and peers down. The sight of the thick red flushed head glistening from dribbled precome made Steve swallow hard. <em>It’s pretty thick,</em> Steve observes, confirming what he feels in his grip. He gives an experimental stroke, eliciting a moan from Billy. With slow and deliberate strokes, Steve burns the image to his memory. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve moves to pull the rest of Billy boxers down but is stopped, “Leave them on?” Billy asks, not ready to take them off just yet. Steve nods, kissing him to soothe the insecurities laced in his request and etched in his worried face. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re so hot,” Steve says breathlessly, nuzzling the side of Billy’s face and kissing him there, “feels so good.” He sighs, twisting his wrist some. “Can I take mine out?” Steve asks, wanting to free himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, yeah do it.” Billy answers breathlessly, struggling to not moan as he spoke. He looked down to Steve pull his own dick out and swallows thickly. Billy hisses and jerks his hips when Steve presses and holds them both in his hand, “Fuck,” his voice cracks. It’s dry and soft, but it’s <em>scorching</em>. And the way Steve tightens his grip to stroke them makes their precome trickle down to create a new mixed mess between them. The brunet sit back enough to lick his lips let a glob of spit fall from his mouth to their dicks to slicken them up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy holds onto Steve’s shoulders and writhes beneath Steve with his back arched off the bed, “Fuck!” he curses again and digging his blunt nails into Steve’s skin. He wants to complain but all he can manage are those pathetic cutesy moans Steve says he loves to hear so much. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve takes shallow breaths to hear the salacious sounds under him, looking back and forth between where he held them in his palm and the sexy faces Billy’s making. With the roll of his hips, Steve braces his arm against the mattress and leans down to kiss his boyfriend, who moans and struggles to kiss him back. He muffles over the sounds with sweet nothings whispered against his lips, kissing him in between words. A fog of pleasure </span>
  <span>funneling himself deeper into lightheaded fog of pleasure. “ ‘M bout to come,” Steve pants, skin slapping loudly as he moves his hand faster.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Tears squeeze out the corners of Billy’s shut eyes as own buildup climbs to meet Steve. He tenses up trying to focus on reaching that much needed release. “Don’t stop,” he begs and turns his face away. <em>Fuck this is embarrassing,</em> Billy thinks, <em>moaning like a bitch in heat – I can only imagine what he thinks of me like this.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>He’s fucking amazing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, is what Steve thought.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He wouldn’t push Billy to look at him properly, but they’ll get to that comfort level soon enough. This was enough. More than. In the meantime, he nuzzles Billy’s neck, sucking a dark hickey against that tan skin. He can feel his shoulder bearing all the weight beginning to stiffen and ache. Ah but he’s so close – they’re close. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Shhhiiit I’m ‘bout t’come,” Steve hisses, pushing himself all the way up so he could look down between them. Billy’s stomach pulled taut as his chest rose and fell writhing under him, and it sent Steve over the edge. He was never one to be loud during sex or when he finished. But with Billy – Billy made him feel so good he had to vocalize to him just how good he’s feeling. Rope after opaque rope aims for Billy’s abs. Steve’s stopped jerking them off in favor of admiring his work of art as his cock begins to soften. Just when he’s about to reach back down to finish Billy off, Billy runs his fingers through the warm sticky mess.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>This makes Steve shoot his eyes up at Billy, anxious and excited to know what he’s about to do next. Billy looks up at him innocently with his bottom lip caught between his teeth and moves his Steve-come-covered-hand to grab himself. Steve nearly chokes at the sight. He watches intently Billy stroke his spunk covered self, blushing as he does his best to contain his moans. “Holy shit…” Steve whispers, caught up in what Billy was doing in front of him. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The look on Steve’s face is what boosts Billy’s confidence; it makes the younger teen feel, dare he say, <em>sexy.</em> Seeing that Steve’s hard again from watching gives Billy this jolt of power and security of what he’s capable of doing to him. All the doubt swimming in his head before now was in fact just bullshit because this was proof the doubt was just that, bullshit. Billy brings his knees up and parts his thighs wider, growing the slightest bit bolder as he gets more into giving Steve a show. Billy reaches out for Steve’s hand, resting it on his inner thigh, wordlessly encouraging him to touch him more. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And Steve does.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He palms and gently kneads Billy’s thick thigh. He runs his hand up and down and over it, grabbing his hip and swiping his thumb over the prominent bone there. “Christ you’re gorgeous,” Steve tells Billy, giving himself a firm tug to stave off the ache, “you look – you so good, God you don’t even know.” Billy sucks his teeth and sighs, not wanting to hear such girly shit. “What? It’s true.” Steve insists in a soft voice. He feels the hardness of Billy’s muscles, “So,” the coarse hairs on his legs, “fucking,” the deep sounds leaving Billy’s full pink lips, “handsome.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“<em>Fuck~ </em>” Billy gasps, pulling Steve down by his neck to kiss him as he came all over himself. He holds on tightly to Steve’s soft brown locks to ground him as he goes through each crashing wave of pleasure.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When all is calm, they remain there together in bed exchanging kisses and the flicking of their tongues and holding each other into their new start of the year.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey, I gotta ask,” Steve says, gaining Billy’s attention away from his cigarette, “why do you like me anyway?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy’s brows furrow as he blinks in confusion, “Why?” He repeats, “How can I not?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve can’t help but snort when he smiles at Billy’s answer,” C’mon,” he lightly slaps Billy’s shoulder with the back of his hand, “seriously though, why? How come you like me?” He asks again, plucking the cigarette out of Billy’s hand to smoke.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy licks his lips and looks away, “Look,” he grunts, sitting himself up, “I…have a thing for…mouthy brats.” He says, returning his gaze toward Steve, who gawks at him. Billy raises his hand, “Lemme explain,” he interjects, causing Steve to sigh and roll his eyes, waiting for this so-called explanation, “you have a ‘take-no-shit’ attitude. You don’t have time to humor me and it works me up.” Billy twists his hips to the side so he can face Steve properly. “Like that night at the Halloween party last year? And on the court – you didn’t back down from me. And when you didn’t, I thought, ‘oh, he’s different’. People have always let me do whatever I want, except you.” Billy grabs Steve’s hand and kisses his knuckles gently, “And I like that.” He explains. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“So, you like that I can put you in check, huh?” Steve asks, laughing at the way Billy shrugs and nods in faux sense of convinced agreement.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Helps that you’re cute too.” He adds smiling, making Steve groan behind his own shy one. “Are you <em>blushing</em>?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Shuddup,” Steve smacks him playfully. He sighs, grinning like an idiot, “God, you’re insane.” Steve mumbles under his breath. He was moved by the fact it was a piece of his personality that Billy found him attractive and not solely based on his looks.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>here's to hoping you guys are(?) still (?) enjoying (?) yourselves</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: abuse</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Since the New Year, Billy and Steve’s relationship had grown more seriously. Or at least that’s what it felt like between them. Because they had spent quality time together first and then gradually became sexually intimate, they felt they appreciated each other more during their time together – however long or short and however frequent. Which was a big deal to them. Nearly all their previous relationships were sexually motivated to begin with, <em>then </em>progressed on a personal level, which never lasted long. (With of course the exception of Nancy with Steve but, look how that turned out.)</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Since Billy was expected home, he struggled not being able to hang out with Steve from time to time <s>(which he absolutely and adamantly denied)</s> when Steve was slammed at work or when Billy was on restriction. So he began to take risks. During work Billy would call Steve at the mall while he manned whatever desk he had his shift for if it were slow enough for them both. Max would call the video shop for Billy and ask for Steve before handing him the phone, and Billy would tell Steve to call him at a certain time if he knew Neil and Susan would be out of the house. And Max – she was pretty cool about it all. She got more involved with AV Club and field hockey so that <em>the boys</em> could have “alone time”. Which was pretty cool of her. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The house bustles a bit as Susan and Max get ready to head out to go to a late-night movie at the mall. Billy helped Max with her dinner chores so she could get ready to leave on time with her mom. Neil’s in the living room watching TV when he hears Billy sigh and mumble for Max to go ahead and get ready as the sound of the dishes are placed back into the cabinets. When the phone rings, Neil sighs and rolls his eyes, “Who the hell is calling here so damn late?” He shouts from his chair. It was only 7:30, but to Neil it was too late for house calls. Billy takes heavy strides to the phone and answers it before his dad loses his shit on the person on the other end of the line. <br/><br/>He hears Billy snatch the hand set off the receiver, <em>“Hargrove residence.”</em> He grumbles miserably, which eases Neil back into his chair since his boy has it covered. But it’s the sound of Billy shuffling and talking quietly that recaptures Neil’s attention. He turns his head enough to strain his hearing to try to make out what he can from the kitchen. All he does catch is a harsh whisper, <em>“I’ll call you later”</em>. Interesting. Once Neil hears Billy hang up, he calls out to his son, “Billy who was that?” He hollers from the living room.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy hangs out just beyond the kitchen entrance, drying a dish in his hand, “One of Max’s friends. Told them she’s going to the movies with her mom.” He answers smoothly. <br/><br/>Neil <em>knows</em> what he heard. He’s sure of it. What Billy was telling him was bullshit. “Who?” He presses, testing Billy’s lie.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“El? Told her that we’re off the phone for the rest of the night when we have dinner at six.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The older man grunts, which tells Billy he’s satisfied with his answer. Susan and Max step out into the living room together, the older women walking over to her husband to inform him that they were on their way out. She leans down and gives him a kiss and whispers that they’ll be back soon. Before they walk out the door, “Billy. Don’t you have something to tell your sister?” Neil says loudly, making the girls stop and look over into the kitchen where Billy stood.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh, El called while you were getting ready.” Billy tells her. “But I told her you were going out.” Max knows this is Billy’s cover for when Steve calls while their parents are home. She nods and tells him thanks with a small smile and steps out with her Mom behind her.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy has to wait out his dad before he can call Steve back. Neil’s only four beers in and most likely waiting up for Susan to come home before heading to bed, which means it’ll be a while. <em>Shit</em>. Billy isn’t dumb enough to risk trying to call with Neil within earshot. He accepts that it just may not happen tonight. Which fucking sucks because they haven’t really seen each other in two weeks thanks to the insane work schedule of Steve holding down two jobs. It frustrates him to no end because all Billy has done is man the gym floor and sign out volleyball equipment for numbing hours at a time. Hopeful, he busies himself in his room listening to his record player on low and reading one of Max’s books he borrowed, who she borrowed from Lucas. He’s relieved when he hears the front door unlock. It meant his dad will <em>finally</em> head to bed now that the girls are home and that he could call Steve back. Billy stays still and stops breathing to help him hear beyond his bedroom door. Max tells her mom goodnight and walks to her room, Susan and Neil are talking quietly as they clean up his collection of empty beer cans.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It feels like forever until they’re walking toward the back of the house to their room. Once he hears the familiar creak and soft latch shut them in, Billy springs up to his dresser to grab the phone to place on his bedside and call Steve back. He presses the keys softly and as the line rings Billy stretches his arm out to brush the volume knob down with the tips of his finger. When Steve finally answers, Billy smiles and settles back onto his bed, bringing the base with him to rest on his chest. The line stretches and pulls tight from the wall, barely allowing the distance to accommodate Billy to his late-night conversation with a certain <em>pretty boy</em>. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>All those beers Neil drank woke him up in the middle of the night. The bed groans as he gets up, shuffling to the bathroom down the hall. He doesn’t pay much attention to the darkness around him except – there’s light filtering from under the door to Billy’s room. Curious Neil pads over to the door, leaning in close to listen to what his son was up to at this hour. Beyond the barrier he hears the familiar flirty chuckle Billy tends to use when talking to girls. Neil huffs through his nostrils, <em>typical</em>. He turns to go back to the bedroom and hears the name of the person his son is talking to clear as day, <em>Stevie.</em> Neil freezes and turns to look back, <em>what in the hell?</em> In one lunging step, he pounds on the door, grabbing at the knob to open it himself but it’s locked. “Billy get off the Goddamn phone and open the door, right. now.” </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He hears Billy swear and scramble as he hangs up the phone and opens the door, “Yeah?” </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“The hell you doin’ on the phone so late?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Just talking.” Billy answers.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Just talking huh?” Neil repeats, to which Billy nods. “You know the rules. Off the phone for the rest of the night once we have dinner.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yes sir.” Billy says.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“And uh,” Neil shifts his stance, “who’s <em>Stevie?</em>” He asks.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy’s hot adrenaline flashes and runs cold. His dad had heard him. <em>Fuck.</em> The way he was asking about Steve was like a challenge. But without missing a beat, “A girl from school.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Neil raises his brows, “A <em>girl</em> from school? Named <em>Stevie</em>?” He scoffs.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeeeah,” Billy says and looks at his Dad like he didn’t understand what he had just said, “girls are named Stevie. Y’know, like Stevie Nicks?” Billy explains like it like as if it were obvious</span>
  <span> <br/></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Is <em>she</em> the one who called earlier? Instead of “El?”” Neil questions, looking for Billy to trip up in his lie.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No that was El, like I said.” Billy says, sticking to his story. “I called Stevie when I thought everyone was asleep so…” Judging by the way Neil shifts his jaw, there wasn’t much to poke and prod with. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Cut the light and go to bed.” Neil says short and walks away. Things weren’t adding up. Or rather, there were one too many unusual circumstances happening around him that Neil didn’t like. He couldn’t help but assume the sweater and this <em>Stevie</em> were somehow related. And if Stevie was even a girl like Billy claimed. And that <em>pissed</em> Neil off to no end. It physically sickened him to even think –no. He wouldn’t allow it. But he had to be careful if his hunch went anything to go by. He didn’t have enough reason to get on Billy’s ass for his suspicions. But perhaps he should <em>remind</em> Billy of where they stand and the order of things.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>An uncomfortable feeling had settled in Steve’s gut the night he overheard and realized Billy got caught on the phone late at night. Since Billy had vaguely warned him about his Dad, Steve worried what could’ve happened after Billy hung up. And well, his feeling would prove his instincts from long ago right. It starts when Steve doesn’t see Billy between his jobs. Even when Steve was super busy, he knew Billy would wait up for him to call. Chatting late into the night was the reason Billy would be so tired at work. But even then, Billy would take a short nap with Steve until the brunet had to leave for Family Video.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But that didn’t happen today. And that was weird. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>What was weirder was that no one answered the phone when Steve called. <em>Maybe he’s working overtime or something,</em> he rationalized to keep his worry at bay.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But when Billy didn’t call him at midnight, worry began to gently gnaw away at Steve. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He wanted to call Billy at work – but he didn’t want to get caught. It’d be weird if someone knew he was calling and asking for him, right? Steve worked solo most times so he could get away talking on the phone. But Billy, not so much – not if he was the one calling. So after coming home from Scoops and Billy doesn’t show up, or answer his call, Steve gets ready for his second shift, and drives over to Billy’s. It’s a risk he’s willing to take. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I fucking knew it.” Steve muttered under his breath, seeing Billy’s car parked in the street. Billy’s been dodging his calls. Steve see’s that Neil’s truck isn’t in the drive way, which meant he had about an hour until Neil and Susan returned home. This will be quick anyway.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve bangs on the door loudly and waits patiently. When he receives no answer, he bangs on it again, “Billy I know you’re in there.” He shouts, determined to wait until he came to answer the door. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And yet he doesn’t.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“God damn it, Bill.” Steve sighs. He walks down the porch and around the side of the house to look for Billy’s window. Hopefully none of the neighbors will see him and call the cops. Or tell Neil about him stepping further onto the property. He passes Max’s room with it’s curtains pulled back to see it’s skateboard posters inside. He knew his room was next to hers, so that would mean it would be here, right? Steve raps his knuckles on the window, waiting once more for Billy to answer, this time with success. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When the curtain pulls back, the demand for answers leaves Steve as quickly as they return to him when he see’s Billy’s face. He has a light bruise on the side of his face, his eye appeared as if the swelling had gone down some, and his lip was cut on the side. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Billy what the hell – “ Steve starts off, putting his hands on the window to lift open but it doesn’t. He thinks maybe the window is jammed and he just needs to put a little more muscle into it. But when it refuses to budge, “Billy let me in.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy stands there with the saddest eyes Steve’s ever seen. With a small shake, Billy points to the sill. Looking down, Steve notices something along the frame. Upon closer inspection, Steve sees nails hammered into the window and painted over to match the rest of the trim. Billy was stuck in there. “Wh – what’s this?” Steve asks. Which is dumb because, he knows exactly what it looks like. “Why can’t you let me in the house?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“There’s a chain on my door.” Billy answers behind the slightly muffled pane. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>A chain? “What?” Steve exasperates.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You shouldn’t be here,” Billy says, “I called in sick for the next few days. Until all this shit goes away some more.” He waves at his face. “I’ll call you soon, okay?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No Billy wait,” Steve slaps the window.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Don’t come back here Steve.” Is all Billy says as he walks away from Steve yelling and knocking on the window. But with the curtain closed, Steve knows there’s nothing more he can do. Steve’s mind is racing. The bruises, the cuts, the flinching, the aches, the pains, the anxiety – it all clicked in Steve’s head.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy was being abused. By Neil, no doubt.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve stood there frozen in place, wondering what he should do – if there was anything he <em>could</em>do.Does he call the cops? What would they say? Billy was 18, he was an adult. It wouldn’t be considered child abuse. And he lived at home. If he really didn’t want to live there, he was free to leave because he’s an adult. No, no, no, no, wait – there’s gotta be something. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Ah, domestic violence maybe? That would be enough right? And the nailed in window, the chain on his door? That’s like imprisonment, right? But before he could do anything, he needed to talk to Billy. He could easily make everything worse for him if he went running off to the cops and telling them half-thought up ideas. He didn’t think he was <em>wrong</em> of course but – if he went to them and can’t answer their questions, they may not even investigate. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But that felt wrong on so many levels. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The dilemma of wondering what was right and what was best put Steve Harrington between a rock and a hard place. Does he tell? Or does he wait? Either way, it felt like Steve would aid a hand in worsening the situation with Billy’s life on the line. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Or maybe he could ask Max to help him out.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>There was no way she hadn’t known, right? Steve felt it would be nearly impossible for anyone living under the same roof to not notice shit like that. Even though Billy was a total dick to her and kept to himself, they were around each other a lot. Right?</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve drives over to the middle school scanning the sea of teens pouring out. Was it AV club today? <em>Shit,</em> he didn’t know. It wouldn’t hurt to check, right? Or would it be weird? An older guy stalking around for a specific girl. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Or…</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Excuse me?” Steve interrupts an older woman sitting behind a desk in the office, “I’m looking for Dustin Henderson. I’m his babysitter. His mom sent me here to pick him up however, I’m not sure if he has AV club today.” Dustin was the perfect cover rather than asking around for Max like some creep. The woman smiles and nods and points him in the direction of where to find the club for himself. Thanking her, he runs to the room hoping to find Max with them. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He barges into the room, making the group inside jump slightly and look at the door. Max is there. “Steven!” Mr. Clarke says delightfully. Steve stands out in his memory because Steve struggled in his class and received a lot of help from his female peers in tutoring. “What brings you by?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Dustin looks at him weird, wondering the same thing. “Oh ah, I need to speak with Max real quick if you don’t mind.” He says, looking over at her. She rushes over to him, pushing him out of the room and closing the door tightly.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What’re you doing here?” She whispers.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What the hell happened to Billy, Max?” He asks her out right. “Why’s he all locked up in his room ‘n shit?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max looks away, hesitant to tell him anything, “Steve – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No don’t ‘Steve’ me,” He cuts her off. “Max, you can trust me. You know that right? Just tell me what happened.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max really wants to tell him but worries about word getting around. She hugs herself and looks down at her feet, “It’s Neil.” Is all she says.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Although Steve suspected as much, hearing it come out like that held the same amount of shock. “Does he hit you too?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No, no way,” Max shakes her head. “Mom would never let that happen.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh but it’s okay for it to happen to him?” Steve raises his voice. Seeing as Max flinches back from him, he takes a deep breath. “I – sorry. I’m not yelling at you or anything I just don’t understand why all this is happening.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s been getting worse,” Max says softly, “I didn’t know stuff like this wasn’t happening but, when we moved here, I overheard them one time and…I didn’t know what to do. When I asked my Mom pretended not to know what I was talking about. And Billy said if I told anyone that things would get worse for us so..." </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“So he told you not to say anything.” Steve guesses, and Max nods. “Shit.” He sighs, running his hand through his hair, stressed and worried about Billy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Max looks around to see if they were alone, “You guys need to be careful.” She cautions him. “Neil blows everything out of proportion when it comes to Billy. Don’t give him any reason to, okay?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve looks at her and doesn’t know what to say. “You can’t tell anyone, Steve.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I can’t believe you’re honestly asking me to do that,” Steve says shaking his head slightly. “It’s one thing that we’re in this secret relationship that no one except you and Robin know about, but you’re telling me I can’t report this to anyone?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Steve if you do, they might take me away from my Mom.” Max says, scared and eyes begging. “Please don’t say anything.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“God this is so fucked up…” Steve sighs to himself in disbelief. Taking a moment to think things over, he looks at her once more, “Gimme your house key, I need to talk to him.” Without hesitation, Max fists her front pocket and pulls out a red and black checkered beaded lanyard with a key tied to its end. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve makes a beeline for his car to head back to Billy’s house. He can’t imagine the shit Billy’s gone through. And when he does try to think of what might’ve happened, it makes Steve angry and uncomfortable to the point he’s squirming in his seat. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When he arrived back to Cherry Road, Steve loudly unlocks the front door and charges into the home in search of Billy’s room. He found a fucking <em>chain</em> on the front of the bedroom door. He jiggles it a bit, freeing it loose and swinging open the door. “Alright, what the hell?” Steve says.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What the hell are you doing here?” Billy asks, standing up quickly to push Steve out.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh my God your face,” Steve says softly, cupping Billy’s cheeks gently to examine him properly. It looked so much worst up close and personal than through a dirty scratchy window.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Reaching up to bring Steve’s hands down, Billy carefully moves away, “I’m fine.” He rasps. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No, you are not <em>‘fine’,</em> Bill. What the fuck happened? Did your Dad do this?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy tenses up, “Don’t worry bout it Steve.” He says a little firmer.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Whaddyou mean don’t worry about it? How can I not when you look like this?” Steve persists on the verge of begging. “Babe just tell – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s none of your Goddamn business, Steve!” Billy yells, angry and desperate to make Steve stop pressing him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh yeah?” Steve shouts back. “Because Max has said otherwise.” He says with one hand on his hip.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You fucking talked to <em>Max?</em>” Billy asks angrily. “Why the fuck would you do that behind my back?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Because I know you wouldn’t.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well whatever she said is a fucking lie,” Billy lies, “she doesn’t know shit.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>”Then tell me!”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Tell you <em>what!</em>” Billy exasperates.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Tell me about all the times you’ve come over, wincing in pain because you got ‘hurt at work’. Hm? Go on!” He asks in air quotations with his fingers. “Go on and tell me about that time I asked you about that scar on your eyebrow,” he points above Billy’s eye, “I thought you were ready to rip my fucking head off just for asking.” He adds. When Billy has nothing to say, Steve continues, “Well, am I right? I’m not <em>that</em> dumb, Bill.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy scoffs and shakes his head, “Jesus Christ,” he covers his eyes, rubbing them gently, “this isn’t your concern –“</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Why are you protecting him?” Steve asks with a painful crack in his voice. Billy can’t stand to see Steve’s eye begin to redden and glisten. He turns his back to avoid looking at the pained expression on his face. “Why are you letting him hurt you, Billy?” Steve steps around Billy to look at him and hold his face again, “Babe <em>please </em>talk to me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy looks into Steve’s worried eyes inviting him to confide in him. But the obedient leash tugs and pulls Billy back in. He didn’t need to involve him in this. “You need to leave,” Billy croaks, “get out…” he gently places his palm on Steve’s chest. He doesn’t have the force to truly push him away, not even to stutter step an inch back.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve doesn’t understand anything right now. What is he supposed to do, sit back and let all of this happen? Billy could leave – he’s an adult, he doesn’t have to stay here and take it. But the familiar helpless feeling tells him that maybe it wasn’t Billy’s decision to stay. Which only frustrates him. His watch beeps, letting him know he needs to leave soon to make it to his second shift of the day. They would have to discuss this later. Being here was enough of a risk already.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: mention of past child abuse</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It’s been a few days since Steve came by the house. Billy avoided calling, thinking Steve wouldn’t answer or want to talk. The silence makes Billy anxious and nervous. Did he fuck up by keeping it a secret from Steve? For yelling at him? For sending him away? The subject at hand was heavy and uncomfortable, which made Billy uneasy to talk about in the first place. For him it wasn’t a big deal, it was just part of his life. He knew full well how messed up it was, which was why he especially kept it from Steve.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy agonizes over it during work, and patience is not in Billy’s vocabulary. He goes straight to Steve’s after work to paces back and forth alongside the pool, chain smoking one cigarette after another. It felt like ages were zooming past the blond with waiting for Steve. He had to explain everything and warn Steve about Neil. But more importantly, Billy wasn’t sure how or why, but he knew his dad was onto him. About what <em>exactly</em>, the older man wasn’t too sure ofimself, that much Billy could tell but he knew his Father better than anyone. If Neil was suspicious of anything, he would intervene before it became a problem, even if the problem never existed in the first place. Which was why Billy had gotten knocked around days before; all over a fucking phone call. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He pulls in one last drag of his cigarette and puts it out in the overcrowded ashtray, sharply exhaling a smoke of stress which he feels. He lights another cigarette, emptying the whole pack he just bought earlier today. The familiar sound of Steve’s car pulls up in the driveway, headlights filtering through the bushes and onto the patio of the pool. Billy knows Steve knows he’s here. And he knows the brunet will find him in the back smoking if he doesn’t answer when called for inside the house. But now that Steve’s home, Billy’s anxiety grows steadily with his heart rate increasing to the point where he can feel beating in his ears. The side door slides open and Billy looks up to be greeted by that famous sailor outfit. “Hey,” Steve calls out, hesitant and unsure what to say since the last time they say each other and argued, “see you finally used your key,” he comments. Yeah, Steve had given him a key to his place in case he wanted to come over. Steve steps out onto the patio to join Billy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Can we talk?” Billy’s voice strains. He took another nervous drag of his cigarette, avoiding the now worried look on Steve’s face.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Everything okay?” Steve asks as he closes the door behind him. He already knows it’s not however, he needed to go into the situation calmly and composed. Judging by the distressed expression etched in Billy’s brows, Steve figured whatever was on the younger teen’s mind involved something uncomfortable that they needed to discuss. “What’s goin’ on babe?” He quietly asks out of growing concern. He rubs Billy’s arm to ease and comfort him, “You know you can talk to me.” He coaxes.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I came to talk to you about my Dad,” Billy starts, throat hoarse from all the cigarettes he’s already had. He turns to look at Steve, “About what happened and – I think he’s onto me. Onto <em>us.</em>” He emphasizes. “I dunno how much he knows or what exactly but…I fucking <em>know</em> he’s – he’s suspicious.” He pulls another long deep drag between his lips, filling his lungs with smoke hoping for the nicotine to calm him down.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Is that why…before?” Steve asks, referring to why Billy had been at home for those few days. When Billy nods, “Oh…” Steve whispers. Billy keeps nodding, silently agreeing to that <em>oh shit</em> feeling about the possibility of Neil finding out about their relationship. “Well,” he starts off, searching his mind for something positive to help calm Billy’s worries – but nothing comes to mind yet. Because it’s seriously messed up that Neil would not only hit his son, but beat him over being suspicious of being gay? Or the possibility? Billy sighs when Steve goes up to him and hold him close, “We’re in this together, yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well, <em>yeah,</em>” Billy answers as if it were obvious.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“That’s what matters right? You and me, side by side wherever we are, and everyone who supports us.” He rubs Billy’s back and not letting go, “Good, bad, ugly, uncomfortable, happily ever after, I’m here.” He vows. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy unclenches his jaw and relaxes his shoulders. The dull headache instantly begins to fade away and feels comfort in Steve’s words. “Yeah…yeah okay.” He agrees.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah.” Steve can’t help but step closer into Billy when his arms coil around his own waist. He kisses the soft curls draped over Billy’s temple, “ ’s gonna be okay. I promise.” He murmurs loud enough for Billy to hear. Steve didn’t know how to help or protect Billy from Neil. But Steve was sure they had a lot to talk about. They sway in a slow twist motion for a while before Steve convinces Billy to come inside so they could talk a little bit before the blonde had to return home. They end up in Steve’s room so the brunet could change into something more comfortable.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With the stress and worry Billy felt about Neil’s confrontation, Billy poured his heart out to Steve about the man. He felt as if he had to explain himself. Or his Dad. He wasn’t sure which. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I dunno when it all even started. It’s like…I don’t remember a time when he wasn’t like this.” Billy says. He’s laid out on his back, tucked beneath Steve who’s on his side with his head propped up on his hand. Billy’s quiet for a while, but Steve is patient. He reaches down to hold Billy’s hand to support him, to take him time, to comfort him. That whatever he had to say, he wouldn’t judge him, that his confessions were safe with him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy thinks back on his earliest memories. The only thing he can recall are bad memories of him; angry, yelling, dissatisfied, disappointed. “Being around him is like…okay, you know how when your parents are pissed? Whether it be at work, at each other, or at you? And either way you do whatever you can to not add to it?” Steve nods. He can recall plenty of times of his parents coming home from a business meeting that didn’t go over too well, or them going to separate rooms to get away from one another after a heated argument that could be heard out on the front porch, or even when Steve brought home shit report cards. Steve would avoid them until it blew over.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s like that, but all the time.” Billy takes a moment to take a deep and steady breath, as if talking about it was giving him anxiety. “You’re walking around eggshells, moving out his way when he’s walking around the house, responding immediately and in the right tone…can’t even <em>look </em>like you have an attitude without him telling you to “wipe that look off your face”…I dunno, he’s always looking for a reason to get in my face and beat my ass.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy can remember nearly every instance which Neil would call him a pussy or refer his behavior of a faggot. He's pretty sure he was called those things as young as the age of seven. <em><span>Seven.</span></em> Jesus H Christ. Thinking back on it now, all Billy can do is shake his head and huff in disgust. What could make a father call his own child such things they know nothing about its meaning? Such verbal abuse felt like he was constantly taunted for a reaction and mocked for submitting to it. As if Neil was competing against his own child to toughen him up for the real world. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Thinking harder on it now, Billy doesn't recall Neil ever saying that shit around his mom. Not for a while at least. When Neil finally did, she fucking snapped. Yeah sure, they had plenty of arguments out in the living room down the hall from where Billy's room was. But it was nothing compared to when Neil outright accused her of turning him into some queer, <em>“all that coddling and sensitivity bullshit you’ve been feeding him is the reason he’s such a pussy at everything he does.”</em> She'd slapped him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy had come to realize some time ago that it was nothing Billy ever did or said to make his dad suspicious of potentially having a gay son. No, Neil believed the love and sensitivity his mother gave him would be enough to emasculate him to the point of desiring other men. If Billy loved like a woman, that he would essentially become one too. The hysteric phobia was fucking stupid beyond belief. Yet here Billy was, on the receiving end of a lifetime of abuse to guarantee him a literal straight path in life.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As much as Billy’s mom did to protect him, her defenses meant nothing to Billy when she'd decided to leave. “I get why she</span>
  <span> left,” Billy says after explaining to Steve about his old home life. Steve pauses mid-breath in shock. Billy’s mom <em>abandoned</em> him. Usually when one heard of single parents it was either the dad was never in the picture or the mom tragically passed. Steve felt sad hearing that and felt even worse knowing what Billy was subjected to in her absence. “He hit her, called her names – no one should put up with that. But… if she thought he wouldn’t take his anger out on me she was fucking naïve to think that.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The glint of his necklace catches his attention. He picks it up with his free hand and looks at it, thumbing the tarnished pendant. “Maybe that’s why she left this behind for me,” he shows Steve. Steve can see it in Billy’s face that he’s deep in his feelings and memories if his glistening eyes were anything to go by. “This was hers. Probably thought it would protect me. Maybe it has…haven’t had an injury too life threatening. Yet.” Billy mumbles the last part. And fuck that’s just, so much for Steve to hear. He squeezes Billy’s hand. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As much as Billy resented his mom, the necklace reminded him of the good memories he had with her. As much good as it offered him, the pendant reminded Billy of the pain too and the price he pays on a regular basis. “But what do I know? She stopped calling and stopped answering my calls after a while.” To her credit, he's not sure if it was all on her own or if one day Neil picked up the phone and told her to fuck off. Either way, it hurt that Billy felt forgotten at the age of 12.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I think the worse part though,” Billy’s voice cracks. He clears it and swallows wetly, trying not to cry, “was when Susan learned how my dad treated me, and didn’t say a God damn word.” Billy’s demeanor changed. He was pensive, untangling every event involving Susan walking in on him under Neil’s ruthlessness. Whenever Neil would deliver his verbal or physical abuse, she would stand her frozen like a deer in the road and watch, flinching occasionally when Neil raised his voice or slammed his son against whatever hard surface to make a clatter.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Whenever my dad was done and left me, she’d come around and patch me up best she could…never saying anything, or even <em>looking</em> at me while I stared at her wondering why she didn’t step in. That’s when I realized no one cared about me. So I stopped giving a shit about anything and everything.” She did seem remorseful for the treatment he was under, ashamed even for not intervening. But her doing this much put her at risk. The one time she scrambled to his side to care for him, Neil had caught her and put her in her place, <em>“He’s my son, not yours! He’s my business, and mine alone.”</em> It was the only warning she needed before it would resort to a backhand across her own face.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But as Billy got older, and went looking for trouble, Susan stopped going to Billy's aid after Neil was done laying into him. So when she overheard Billy's whimpers and pleas, she pretended not to hear. If she walked into a disciplinary talk between her husband and his son, she would stop and turn around. “You know, I used to feel jealous that I was the only one,” Sometimes Max peaked around the corner to see what was going on only to be ushered out with great urgency. Now Billy’s throat is tightening, unable to acknowledge how he wished he weren’t the only one who hurt. Because it wasn’t fair to wish that sort of thing any anyone. Especially a young defenseless kid. “And I – “ Billy covers his eyes with his hand, frustrated that he’s starting to cry over his immense guilt of how he, “treated her the same way.” He says, talking about Max. Threats, yelling, pushing her around, breaking her things. All the same shit Neil started off before his mom left. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve leans over and pulls Billy in, hugging him closely. He holds him, pressing his face into the side of Billy’s and listening to the retched sobs. Steve had no idea before but listening to all the fucked-up shit Billy had gone through and how much he’d changed left Steve shell-shocked. He’d been hit with personal rotted roots of Billy’s past, and compared to the person he is today, Steve couldn’t help but feel <em>relieved.</em> Relieved that Billy trusted him with this intense toxic infestation that’s been eating away at him and allowed himself to be so vulnerable. But most of all, Steve was <em>proud</em> of Billy with how far he’d come. It reminded him in the ways he too had grown from his old arrogant pretentious self. He knows how difficult it is to admit the wrong doings done onto others, to repent and hopefully be forgiven. And, if possible, to no longer be judged as your old self.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy clung to Steve, hiding his face from the rest of the world in his chest, worried that Neil would somehow hear him from here and come stomping over to tell him to stop his crying and ridicule him of acting like a fucking <em>girl.</em> But that was impossible. Here Billy was <em>safe</em>. Steve made it possible for Billy to feel like he’s escaped the harsh world when he’s with him. Billy could finally breathe and take off the mask and lower his defense systems when he was with him. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy was made to believe he was hard to love, incapable of loving, worthless, destructive. And he internalized it. He would rather settle for temporary love and affection because that’s all he thought about love. That it was conditional. Limited. Ingenuine. <em>Rare</em>. Billy hoped the anger he ruminated in would prevent Steve from loving him and permit him to live in isolation that he had been made to believe deserving of. Because anger helped camouflage these foreign feelings he’d grown estranged to. And in those times Billy lashed out against Steve, Steve remained unmoved.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve didn’t deny Billy humanness and never faltered away from him when Billy distanced himself. As annoying as Billy found it at times, Steve didn’t let him shut himself up and pretend everything was fine when it wasn’t. It was in those moments Billy saw how much Steve genuinely cared for him. He didn’t mind peeling away layer after decaying layer if it meant Billy allowed himself to let in Steve and help him break his unhealthy self-destructive cycles. The brunet was the one who could manage to get through Billy with rationality to regain the blonde’s attention. In the time they spent together, Steve had seen parts of Billy others would consider monstrous. Instead, he found Billy worthy; no careful evaluation needed. Because of all this, Steve made Billy feel cared for, known, and <em>acknowledged</em>. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It was weird for Billy trying find himself. He had no idea who he was since he’d been so restricted to who he <em>should </em>be. He killed and buried that part of him a long, long time ago. Billy mourned his loss in exchange to survive under Neil’s initiations in preparation for manhood. That part no longer existed, and it couldn’t be brought back since so much had happened. He’s too different now than before. Billy felt homesick for the truth; to be freed of this fake life. So now he had to work on finding himself all over again. But he’s so thankful to have <em>someone</em> in his corner to support and help him figure it out. He not only felt this, but he also felt loved, and deserving of it. He could feel it in the way Steve held him close as he cried, he felt it in the way Steve listened, and he could feel it when he wasn’t with the brunet. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve stroked Billy’s hair as he held him, not saying a word, but simply supporting Billy to cry out his pain he’d been carrying for years. And for that, Billy <em>loves</em> Steve, and in love with him and for all the right reasons. He was compassionate, understanding, and accepting of him, flaws and all. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Although Billy had shit representation of what love was, he knew this is what it was. It was confusing and made no sense, as it frequently doesn’t. But he was so sure. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m sorry,” Billy sniffles into Steve’s shoulder.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“For what? The hell you have to be sorry for?” Steve asks, chuckling softly and rubbing his back up and down.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I dunno,” Billy admits, “I just am.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah well, don’t be. Okay?” Steve leans away to look down at the other, tilting his head up, “If anything, I’m sorry for not knowing how to help you.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah well, don’t be. You’re doing exactly what I need you to do.” Billy replies, wiping his eyes roughly and holding Steve close again. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s mind begins to turn as he tries to find a solution to their predicament while they sit together in silence. “Hey,” he says softly, “where would you want to go?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What do you mean?” Billy asks. “Like move?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah,”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy sits there quietly, thinking. “I dunno. California’s expensive,” he says, thinking of his home state.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“We can move there when we have the means,” Steve offers optimistically, “we can go to Chicago, Michigan, Boston, New York,” he offers suggestions. “Fucking <em>anywhere</em> away from here.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Don’t get my hopes up, Harrington,” Billy teases. He’s fond of Steve’s sincerity and dreams for the future – because he was still included in them against the unknown. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m serious, Billy.” Steve says in a tone Billy recognizes he’s not bullshitting. “I want to be with you.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy sits up and studies Steve’s face, “Why?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I think you know why…” is all Steve can say. Billy swallows hard and feels a rush of emotion making his stomach flutter and heart race. All he can do is nod and sinks back down to rest his head on Steve’s chest.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“…I do too.” Billy replies.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They both know what the other was saying. It had been such a heavy night; it wasn’t the right time to properly say those three words. It didn’t mean any less or in passing, but more so in an obvious feeling sort of way. But they knew… in their unspoken understanding sort of way. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s getting late, I should get going…” Billy says to Steve, “You know, before I make it worse.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I don’t like knowing that you’re going home to that dickwad.” Steve says honestly. “You shouldn’t be living there.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah well, I don’t want to risk anything happening to Max.” Billy explains. “It’s a reason why I haven’t left yet to tell you the truth.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve sighs, feeling absolutely defeated and at a loss. “Well – if you need anything just come over. Okay? Promise?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah I promise pretty boy,” Billy smiles, “I gotta go now alright?” He leans in and kisses Steve goodnight, “I’ll let myself out.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve watches Billy slip out into the hall and listens to his footsteps go down the stairs, opening and closing the door followed by the deadbolt locking loudly in place. He felt nauseous knowing what Billy was walking into that house every day. He hears the Camaro roar to life and drive off back to Cherry Road. “God keep him safe…” Steve mutters to himself. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy pulls up into the driveway and kills the engine. The living room light is on and Billy knows that his dad is waiting for him. He gets out quickly, knowing that the longer he makes his Dad wait, the worse their “talk” will go.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Walking up the steps, he picks out the house key on the keychains and slots it in the lock, twisting it clockwise to release the bolt. He shouldn’t be scared. He’s been in this situation 100 times before. But knowing where he’s coming from, it’s that worry in the back of his mind of being found out. Exposed. And sure enough, when he opens the door Neil is quick to stand up from his chair, chest out, chin up, angry, and walking toward him.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re past your curfew, Billy,” Neil says all too calmly, “where’ve you been?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy puts his hands in his jacket pocket, “Out.” It was fucking <em>stupid</em> that he still had a curfew. He was <em>18 and graduated.</em> He shouldn’t be treated like a child anymore.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Neil raises a brow, “You gettin’ smart with me?” He questions, warning Billy just once with the tone in his voice.<br/></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy shifts in place, “No…” Neil looks at him straight on, waiting for the <em>proper</em> response. “...Sir.” The teen adds.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Then? The hell you been? Think you can come in and out of this house whenever you please?” Neil take slow deliberate steps, and Billy knows better than to back up.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You know the rules,” Neil cuts him off, his temper shortening quickly to listen to Billy, “as long as you’re living under <em>my</em> roof, you abide and <em>respect</em> what I say goes.” Standing in front of his son now, towering over him just barely, he glares at him, looking for any tell of lies. “So?” He asks, wanting Billy to explain himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I was hanging out with some friends from work and school.” Billy answers.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“All night?” Neil questions, folding his arms across his chest now. “And,” he shrugs, “you didn’t think to <em>call</em>?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m not a kid anymore Dad,” Billy says firmly, “why do you even give a shit about what I’m doing anyways?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You better watch your mouth,” Neil says with a finger pointed right in Billy’s face, to which his son rolls his eyes, “Hey!” he shouts, stepping closer in Billy’s space, “Have you forgotten what we’ve talked about?” <em>Respect and responsibility.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“How could I <em>possibly</em> forget.” Billy sarcastically sighs, purposefully pushing Neil’s buttons. “You never get off my ass about it.<br/></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The corner of Billy’s mouth twitches up when he sees the rage burning in his father’s eyes. He wonders if he’ll risk waking up the girls with the sound of his shouting and breaking shit from shoving him to what little they have left to decorate their home.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Who were you with?” Neil says sharply, tired of his son’s games and smartass attitude.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I already told you – "</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span> “You see, <em>that’s</em> where you’re wrong.” Neil says a little louder. “There’s something you’re not telling me. I know you’re hiding something.” He accuses.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy’s heart is beating out of his ears. This was the sort of shit he constantly overthinks about. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m not hiding anything!” Billy raises his voice defensively, now growing upset and terrified that the truth is getting closer to being revealed.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Stop <em>lying</em> to me!”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m <em>not</em> <em>lying!"</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span> “<em>Then where were you?!</em>” Neil shouts, grabbing Billy by his arms. It’s just like when he confronted and accused Billy’s mom of cheating. That same hatred in his eyes, the bruising grip. Billy was ready to take the same hit his mother got –</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span> “What’s going on?” a sleepy voice calls out from behind Neil. They both look to see Max down the hall, “I heard yelling,” she says, “everything okay?”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Neil releases Billy, “Everything’s fine Maxine. Go back to bed, sweetheart.” He says all too sweetly and with a trained smile. Max hesitates for a moment and shifts her gaze over to Billy to see if he was in deep shit. But he silently nods at her to go.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright…goodnight.” She tells them both. They wait for the sound of door shutting before Neil turns back to Billy. And takes a deep breath, the kind where he’s still pissed and even more so because he was interrupted.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Come home late again, and you’ll be calling out of work for a week.” Neil threatens, shoving Billy away from him. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy catches himself from stumbling backward and watches his dad walk to the back of the house. His senses come back to him, alerting him of an important piece of information he had learned. Neil was beginning to suspect something. He knows <em>something</em> is going on in his private life. And that something? Neil knew whatever it was, it was <em>threatening</em> the man he’s been molding into Billy. This only meant one thing: Neil is going to destroy it once he figures it out. Anger swells in Billy’s chest. He feels so powerless as he stands there clenching his fists and grinding his teeth. He wants to walk back out that door to Steve’s and never come back. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sorry the chapter update lengths are a bit inconsistent. i just don't know when to stahp.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A/N: I'm sorry for such a long wait. This semester has been very hectic with the pandemic, school, and other personal matters. And to be quite honest, I'm very dissatisfied with this chapter simply because I need it to continue the slow-ish burn of this work, if that makes any sense. But I promise I really did my best, I just wish I executed it better. But I promise after this chapter, shit is going to get real. With that said, I hope you enjoy this update. And if not, I understand lol I blame myself  ^.^"</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I mean you can still come over if you want,” Steve told Billy over the phone as he did the dishes. The spiral cord of the phone bumped against his leg as he moved about, washing the dishes as he held the receiver between his shoulder and ear. “They won’t care if you’re over. It’s not like I never had my friends swing by to hang out.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy sighs, unsure if he should bite or not. “You’re <em>sure</em> they won’t care?” He asks. “Not like – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No, not like him. I promise. My parents are way too conscious of their face value for guests than they say anything they dislike.” Steve mutters, looking over into the den where his parents review documents of some deal they were doing. “They’re gonna be around more so, it won’t be a problem.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Sighing once more, Billy yields, “Alright. If you say so.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright,” Steve </span>
  <span>smiles</span>
  <span>, “I’ll see you in a bit?” When Billy agrees, they hang up and Steve finishes up. Once he’s done, he goes over into the room where his parents are. “Uh,” he drawls, knocking on the door entryway frame, gaining his parents’ attention, “sorry to bother you but um would it be okay if I had a friend stay for dinner? He and I are hanging out today and – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well of course sweetheart,” his Mom smiles, “who’s your friend?” She asks.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Ah, Billy. Hargrove.” He answers. When he and Billy fought, he never dropped his name to his her when she badgered him of who had hit him, so the name is new to her. Especially considering she doesn’t stick around long enough to learn about the family who moved in last year.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Okay! That’s fine. Right dear?” She turns to her husband, who grunts in agreement and waves her over to review something. “Alright well, it’s fine if he comes over. Rosa is coming over tonight to cook for us tonight.” Ah right, Rosa. She was their private chef his parents hired while they were home. Steve can’t even remember the last time she was over.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Before his Dad has anything to say in disagreement, Steve bolts to pick up his room a bit. It was the middle of spring and Steve thought maybe they could go for a hike in the woods behind the house. The pool and the mall had been ruined for them both, they needed new scenes to appreciate together. And in a way, this was new for them; Billy coming over to house when Steve’s parents were home, maybe having dinner with them afterwards. Steve had been paranoid at first that the neighbors would be nosey enough to tell his Mom and Dad about Billy’s visits but surprisingly, they hadn’t said shit except complain how loud the engine on the Camaro was driving through late at night at times.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But with Billy coming over now, their relationship felt as if it was becoming normal. Like – even though no one knew about them, they felt safe together in the open without any suspicion. Well – there was <em>Neil</em> of course but – that’s beside the point. The matter of the fact was that they felt comfortable enough to make inconspicuous moves<em>.</em> </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Excitement runs through Steve when he hears the familiar engine about an hour later after getting off the phone with the driver behind the wheel. He doesn’t bolt down the stairs like he usually would to avoid giving himself away to his parents – who would immediately recognize his tell of his “new interest”, as they referred to all of his past short lived relationships. If one would even call his <em>flings</em> that.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He manages to get to the door before either of his parents do to welcome his guest to their home. But it didn’t stop his Mom looking out the front door with him to see who this Billy Hargrove was. “Hi,” she calls out to him with a wave, “I’m Steven’s mother,” she introduces herself with her professional smile.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hi Mrs. Harrington,” Billy calls out, slamming his car door.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s always wonderful to meet new friends of Steven.” She says, “Welcome to our home.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Thank you, Mrs. Harrington. It’s a pleasure to meet you as well.” He tells her in his usually charming tone. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Make yourself at home. Help yourself to whatever you’d like,” she adds. “I’ll be in the office with your father.” Steve nods and closes the door after her.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Wanna walk the woods?” Steve asks Billy, jutting his thumb over his shoulder toward the back of the house.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah. I got some new ‘stuff’ for us to try.” Billy winks, tapping his chest pocket. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Together they cut through the back yard and into the woods behind the house, following this faded dirt trail he had made years ago when he was a kid. Billy lights the end for Steve, giving him the first hit of his stuff. They catch up from the few missed days of not meeting up and the few missed late-night calls. Billy wanted to take Steve out to a party one of the guys from work was having but, “Nah I can’t. Parents are taking me to Enzo’s.”</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Alright, then how bout a movie on Sunday?” Billy suggests.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Can’t I’m hanging with Dustin.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Why the hell are you so busy all of a sudden?” Billy asks half-jokingly, only a little hurt that Steve didn’t have any time for him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve shrugs, offering the hit back to Billy, “It’s been a while since I’ve hung out with Dustin. And my parents are taking me out for my birthday.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Wait what?” Billy slows to a complete stop. “Your birthday’s coming up?” How have they managed to date for this long and not know when their birthdays were?</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve looks back to where Billy is standing and stops in his own tracks, “Er, yeah it’s – this Thursday. But my folks are taking me out on Saturday. And I’m seeing Dustin on Sunday, like I mentioned.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hmm…” Billy hums considerably. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve turns and puts his hands in his jacket pockets, “What? Did you want to do something?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Do something?” Billy repeats. “Of <em>course</em> I do. It’s your fucking birthday, man.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve attempts to contain the small smile on his face but fails to do so. “What’d you have in mind?” He asks, taking a few steps closer.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“We can do whatever you want. That’s the point of it being your birthday. Be the <em>king</em> that you are.” Billy jokes with a sleezy wink.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah sure, sure,” Steve chuckles. He thought about calling out but then remembered he needed to be there since Keith was covering the arcade shift next door for both Thursday and Friday. “I can’t call out though,” he began to explain regrettably. And knowing Billy’s resolution to being busy with work, “And with things at home,” he meant for Billy, “I don’t wanna risk you getting caught sneaking in and out.” It was hard knowing the type of shit Billy went through on a regular basis. And it was harder not to go against Billy’s plea to not say anything to the Hopper. “We don’t have to do anything.” He insists.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy gives him a pointed look of annoyance, “Steve,”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’m just saying we don’t have to is all,” Steve repeats, opening his jacket from his hands stuffed inside. “With work and this shit hole of a town, there’s not much to do.” When Billy sighs, Steve knows he’s irritated him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Okay, well,” Billy licks his lips, “I still want to – y’know, <em>celebrate</em> with you at the very least. Hang out or some shit.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I mean we have <em>today,</em>” Steve points out, earning a scoff from him. “Are you really pouting right now?” Steve teases.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy digs the tip of his boot into the woodland dirt, “…maybe.” Steve can’t help but give a breathy laugh. He reaches out and tugs Billy by his jean jacket for a kiss. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You’re sweet,” he murmurs against his lips, “we can make up for it later, okay? Whenever we have the time.” He promises.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“…fine.” Billy agrees. He gives Steve another kiss and they resume their walk, relighting their joint as they do.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy doesn’t stay for dinner that night, but he does make sure to thank Steve’s parents for allowing him to visit their lovely home and expresses how nice it was to finally meet them. Steve could tell his Dad was unimpressed, but his Mom was more receptive to being friendly. <em>“Feel free to come over when we’re home,”</em> she told him. Steve wondered when he and Billy will have time to spend together again like they had all last summer. He wondered what he and Billy would do. Or, if Billy would plan something for them. Whenever the time comes for them, Steve hoped it would be soon.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve felt so – <em>out of place,</em> being at Enzo’s. His mom had insisted that they go there for dinner, sparing no expense for his belated birthday dinner. At the cost of having to wear a suit and tie, drinking wine Steve did not have the taste for, and settling for the silver lining in this…family dinner. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>If one would call it that.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>His mom had to constantly get his dad to ease up on the interrogation of questions. “How is work? When did you pick up a second job? Why? Are you saving your money? Have you looked into ways to improve your applications for college? Why not?” On and on and on...</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“For Heaven’s sake dear, let him enjoy tonight. He’s earned it. Taking care of the house, himself, and working.” Mrs. Harrington says, supporting her son and downing her flute of white wine.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’s fine, Ma,” he assures her. He begrudgingly answers each of his father’s questions with a grain of salt as exhausting as it was.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And of course, his father’s responses were all nothing but grunts and disapproving stares from him, reminding Steve how their relationship was pretty much nonexistent. He swore his own father secretly resented him, which was a kind reminder why he never shared anything with him. And which was why he was going to make sure he would never know about Billy. Not to save face but to avoid an ultimate reaming and disownment.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“So! What’ve you been up to these days?” Dustin asks. “It’s been forever since we hung out.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well you know, I’ve been busy with work and what not.” Steve answers.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“How’s it working two jobs?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Eh well,” Steve sighs, “not bad. Don’t really have time for anything else really.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah no shit,” Dustin laughs. “But seriously. You don’t have anything else going for you?” He asks right as he bites into his food.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve felt like Dustin was probing him for something more. He and Billy had been worried about people getting suspicious about them both. So for Dustin to press him was striking up his paranoia. “Nah, not really, man.” Steve answers lamely.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Dustin’s brows pinch together and hums. Steve pauses for a moment, wary of how to interpret his young friend’s response. “Everything okay?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Huh?” Dustin looks up, chewing his burger, “Oh yeah, it’s just – “ he takes a moment to chew and swallow a bit, covering his mouth, “it’s just whenever you’re super busy like you have been, you usually have a girlfriend or something.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s heart drops into his ass. There was absolutely no fucking way in hell that Dustin could know anything about him and Billy. He had forgotten how observant his child friend could be. Avoiding giving any suspicion, he shakes his head, “Nah man. Don’t have time for that,” he laughs nervously. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What about Robin?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Robin? No, no, I’m not her type,” he says. Which is absolutely true. “She’s still in school and we’re just friends.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh huh. Heard that one before,” Dustin wiggles his brows.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No seriously,” Steve insists, “we’re <em>just</em> friends.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“For <em>now,</em>” Dustin continues. When he recognizes the annoyance on Steve’s face, he drops it, “I’m just sayin’. Heard it before, is all.” Dustin shrugs his shoulder, snatching up a napkin to wipes his mouth and greasy fingers. </span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve rolls his eyes and shakes his head and sips on his soda. “So, what’s it like working with Keith? Do you get first dibs to watch the new movies that come out on tape?” Dustin asks</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh he’s a real joy to work with,” Steve grouses under his breath. “Dude hates my guts. I do a bunch of tedious bullshit around the shop but, no rent fees. So, I guess it’s not too bad.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Nice.” Dustin smiles. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With the subject changed, Steve asks Dustin about Suzy, how high school was going, how his mom was, Tews – things he wanted to know but to keep him from going back to his personal life. Which felt weird not to talk about. He didn’t mind sharing his life and personal experiences with Dustin, keeping the more explicit stuff private, but he felt like he was an imposter now. Like he was wearing a mask to pass as the Steve Harrington everyone knows him to be. He still was but, things had changed for him that added to himself, if that makes any sense. He couldn’t bring himself to tell Dustin about those new developments. Not just with Billy – which he would never do without outing him – but just that fact alone: he likes boys too. And, who knows what that would do to his friendship with Henderson. Robin may have teased him about being a surrogate-like mother to the kid, but it would fucking suck to be outcasted by one. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Ah, this was too much to think about now. <em>I should be enjoying my time with him now, not worry about whatever bullshit the future holds. I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.</em></span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A/N: There you have it. Again, I'm sorry I made you all wait so long for this update. But I do have the next chapter ready to go!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I feel like this turned out the way I wanted it to? But idk. If you're disappointed with (another) chapter, sorry. But again, I'm trying not to jump too fast! Thanks so much for your patience and support this far! This is going to come to a close soon(ish).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It was surprising to Steve of how much Billy took advantage of going over to the house. His visits mostly consisted during the two hours Steve had between his jobs. It was nice to see that Billy had become comfortable around Steve’s parents. Although his Dad barely acknowledged him, Billy didn’t mind. Mom however was always thrilled to see him, always asking for him to stay for dinner.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But what was more surprising than anything, was how daring Billy had grown to be.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They usually kept the door open when his parents were home, but his Mom would always come by and close it gently for them. At face value, it didn’t seem strange to do so, seeing as they were boys. If Steve had a girl over however, it would be a different scenario. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And Billy took advantage.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The first time it happened was a grand opportunity Billy saw to “make up” for missing out on his boyfriend’s birthday. Clueless, Steve asked what he meant, earning a hand on his belt buckle. Thinking it would be another jerk session, Steve thought it to be exciting since the stakes remained the same for getting caught. But when Billy slipped off the bed and gone down on his knees…</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>O-Oh.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    
  </em>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Time felt frozen as Steve just sat there on the bed and watched Billy help himself to taking the next step for them both. And <em>apparently,</em> he was excited because Billy teased him mercilessly. “Really, Harrington? I’ve only gotten down on my knees…” he looks at the outline trapped beneath the boxers.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Shut up,” Steve mutters, slipping his fingers through Billy’s curls, pushing them back over his shoulder.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Looking up at Steve, Billy can’t help but smirk. Steve’s trying to control his excitement with shallow breaths, as if he would spook him and change his mind. He’d been very good about the pace Billy had set for them. Steve had given him control, and because of it, Billy had not only grown comfortable with being intimate with Steve, but confident as well.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Which brings us here.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy was thankful that his hands weren’t shaking from nervousness as he pulled down the front of the boxers down. He’d <em>obviously </em>never done this before. But he had been on the receiving end plenty of times to know what felt good and what didn’t. On the bright side, he’s more than well acquainted with Steve’s dick. At least there’s that. Not to mention that Billy himself <em>wanting </em>and <em>interested </em>in being more physical with Steve. His patient and gentle approach truly made the blonde teen feel cared for and protected. <em>Okay, okay, okay, just – just do it, </em>Billy thought to himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve was about to tell Billy he didn’t have to with how apprehensive he appeared to be.<br/>But then he just –</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Holyshitholyshitholyshitholyshit,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Steve’s mind raced. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Bi-Billy,” Steve hisses in a whisper, squirming in place. His gaze frantically goes back and forth between the top of Billy’s head and the bedroom door. “Dude!” he hisses.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Glaring, Billy stops, “Don’t “dude” me when your dick is in my mouth.” Before Steve can say anything else, Billy resumes, trying to go take a little more this time. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“My parents are fucking downstairs,” Steve whispers harshly, eyes flying to the door.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy comes up with an unfair wet suck to the tip, turning his head and quietly listening, “That’s weird, I don’t hear anything.” He replies sarcastically.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You know what I mean you bra-ah!” Steve throws his head back, gritting his teeth to choke back a moan. He found himself panting in shaky breaths, unsure if it was because he was excited or nervous about the fact that his mom was floating around the house and that his bedroom was right above his Dad’s office. Maybe it was a combination of both. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Billy – Billy, stop,” Steve tried to warn him, pushing one side of his shoulder, and backing his hips as far as he could from him. But Billy did this thing with his tongue and – </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy pulls back with his face scrunched up. He goes for the desk with the box of tissues, ripping a fistful of them out and pressing them against his mouth to spit out the surprise spunk. “What the fuck, Harrington.” He says in disgust. He’s then met with Steve kissing and pushing him to the floor, dropping the soiled tissue along the way. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I tried to tell you, but you didn’t stop.” Steve murmurs between kisses, moving Billy’s legs to hug around his waist.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh, I’m sorry,” Billy murmurs against his lips. He turns his head, breaking free for Steve to go for his neck instead, “I must’ve not heard you with all that <em>moaning</em> you did.” He retorts, but Steve just gives a breathy chuckle. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh yeah, it was awful,” Steve says facetiously, “I didn’t want to make you feel bad.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh huh.” Billy rolls his eyes. Though this was a new step for them, Billy wasn’t dissuaded by the playful remark. Steve had a way of making him feel self-assured and secure while taking their flirty banter in an unoffending way. “Eck, I still have the taste in my mouth.” Billy grumbles.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Lemme help you with that,” Steve whispers, slipping his tongue past Billy’s lips. It takes Billy by surprise, not sure why Steve wanted to taste himself. It was a little gross and sloppy, but there was fondness he found from him. “This too.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve muffles Billy’s gasp when he grinds the heel of his palm down Billy’s stiff length, his nimble fingers pinching the zipper and undoing it. He can’t help but smile when he feels Billy lift his hips up and rolls them, brushing his crotch against the other above him. Steve wanted to repay Billy for the belated birthday blowjob with his own, which Billy seemed more than happy to oblige him with. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It was thrilling to see Billy be so pliant. He didn’t shy from reciprocation or restrict him from pulling his pants down lower, <em>past</em> the curve of his ass. It was like Billy wanted him to indulge. He had zero idea as to what the hell he was doing, but he did his best to serve Billy adequately. The soft gasps and gentle tugging on his hair told Steve he was doing a good enough job for Billy to enjoy. Steve was met with surprised when Billy came in his mouth, probably payback for earlier – but Steve didn’t mind. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He enjoyed making all of his ex-girlfriends come when he went down on them. He liked the little messes left on his lips and chin, and whatever wet evidence proved on the bedsheets. This was the same thing with Billy. Just a little different. The taste wasn’t off putting to him. Distinct and a bit bitter yes, but not all terrible. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Swallowing it all earn him a light smack from his scowling boyfriend, “Why the <em>hell</em> did you do that?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What?” Steve asks innocently, flinching from another light smack to his shoulder. Billy can’t even bring himself to say it. He gives a resigned sigh and pulls Steve atop of him.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You don’t have to do that,” he mumbles in the crook of Steve’s neck, hiding himself shyly.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Mn well, I wanted to,” Steve answers, kissing along Billy’s sun kissed skin. “I like making you feel good.” He slips his hands under Billy’s shirt, running it along his sides and he kisses the blushing teen. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It’s honestly a miracle Steve’s mom hadn’t come knocking at his door. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And since then there had been a few close calls. They had to make sure whatever they did end up doing was easy to pull away from one another and act as if nothing were going on. And, most importantly, clothes were still on and mostly unruffled. Aside from that, this was how Billy and Steve got to spend time together without any suspicion.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>And again, Max was the MVP of helping them out with staying as late as she could manage at school so Neil couldn’t get on their asses about not coming home right away.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But God that day when Billy first done that, Steve had extra pep in his step. So much so that Robin knew something was up when she stopped by the video store to drop off her rentals and talk with him for a bit. “You okay there, Harrington?” Robin asks with caution.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah! Never better. Why?” He replies, placing her returned rentals behind him on the cart.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>She squints at him, trying to figure out what the hell could’ve happened to Steve to make him all, chipper n’ shit. After a moment, her eyes go wide, “Oh my God,” she starts. She leans in and whispers, “Did B give you a hummer?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Shhhh!” Steve shushes her harshly, looking around them to see if anyone heard her. “Jesus Robin,” seeing that the customers were all by the VHS displays, he looks back to her, “I – we – “he stammers, unsure of how to respond. He clears his throat and tries to make his lean against the counter as causal as possible. When Robin gives him a no bullshit pointed look, “…shut up.” He yields, flustered.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Robin smiles and smacks his arm in congratulations, “Nice!” It should’ve felt weird hearing that come from a girl but considering how much he and Robin had grown close, it just felt like any other moment he would’ve had with his guy friends. But it was better because Robin was supportive, even if she might be grossed out from some minor details because – boys – ew. But even then, she always made sure he was feeling okay about it, considering all of this was new to him and didn’t want him feeling alone and clueless, like she had been for the longest time. It was nice seeing him this happy.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>From what he would tell her before, all the shit that happened with Nancy affected him a lot. And now, at this rate, Nancy who?</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! Also :</p>
<p>Fair warning, shit is going to get real in the next few chapters. I will put A/N to warn about triggers, as well as add to the tags. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing it's going to be in all the best and worst ways possible.</p>
<p>Til next time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A/N: So thanks for not yelling at me for not delivering this chapter sooner. I enjoyed my winter break way too much and now it's *chef's kiss* belle.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The keys clatter loudly when Billy drops them on the dresser. Now that Spring was bringing warmer days, the pool was officially open for use, which meant Billy’s days were only going to get busier like today. And busy days always came with shorter, time pressed meet ups with Steve. Fooling around rushed and in a hurry left Billy just as worked up, bereft, and dissatisfied. And today was no exception. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Max?” Billy called out. Not hearing any response, he checks her room in case she had her Walkman on full blast. Seeing her room empty, Billy figures she was with the party. It was Friday after all. And it was payday, which meant Susan and Dad would be out enjoying happy hour after work. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He had the whole house to himself for a little while longer until Max came home.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Back in his room, Billy tightly shuts the door, locking it and turns on the stereo, flicking the volume knob so it blasts music to drown out all sound. Shirt stripped and jeans kicked away, he lays comfortably on the bed with one arm tucked behind his head and unceremoniously shoves his other hand under the waistband of his boxers to grope himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He sighs and closes his eyes, picturing what he and Steve had done just before coming home, making him grow hard from the thought. He starts off slow, just like Steve had done to tease him, making his dick twitch. Billy moans softly and shifts on the bed a little to avoid lifting his hips. His tucked hand behind his head tugs at his hair as he begins to speed up, picturing it to be Steve instead of himself. Steve had this finesse when he touched him. Steve knew what to do and how to do it to elicit what he wanted to see and hear from Billy. From the way he would twist his wrist, how tight or loose of a grip, how fast or slow to go, and whatever little extra attention to give too. Filthy whispers, breathy confessions, love bites, hair pulls, nail biting grips on his arms and legs – it all got Billy revved up and begging for more most of the time.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But right now, Billy could only do so much. And currently, his efforts were there but they weren’t <em>quite right.</em> Billy scoots up the bed to watch himself jerk off. The sight makes him moan and fall deeper into his pleasures. He wants to move his legs, but these fucking boxers are in the way. He takes them off in a rush, flinging them toward the growing dirty pile. He rearranges his legs with his knees bent and feet planted comfortably, he feels a little more exposed – leaving him to feel a little shameful and embarrassed. <em>Maybe if I rub my balls I won’t feel as open,</em> he thinks as means to somewhat ease the feeling of revealing himself, even if it was just him in his room. With one roll in his palm, Billy drops his head back with a relieved sigh and moving his hands rhythmically.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy feels beads of sweat roll down from his underarms down to his sides, growing hot and little frustrated he can’t <em>get there </em>yet. “Shit,” he grunts with his brows furrowed in deep concentration to home in on that pleasure. He and Steve had done this so many times, for a moment Billy worried that maybe he couldn’t go solo anymore.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Distracted from his own thoughts, Billy jumps when he feels a brush over the underside of his ass. He freezes for a moment and given an experimental touch of his fingertips from his hands on his sack. Oh…oh that felt…<em>different.</em> Licking his lips, Billy dips his hand lower, exploring where exactly these touches will lead him. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Brushing over the skin once more, a chill runs down Billy’s spine, making goosebumps ripple through him. It feels weird at first. Touching himself down here like this wasn’t uncomfortable exactly, but more like he never knew how good this could feel. He flinched a little getting used to the sensation and moved on to other areas. Moving his leg out of the way, he gently pinches and grabs at his ass, occasionally retreating back to his inner thighs to not overwhelm himself.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>His newfound inner voice in his head whispers a suggestion to him that seems fucking wild at first, making his old self disgusted at first. But seeing as the suggestion appealed to him, he shimmied down the bed once more and parted his second leg. His heart raced as hand gravitated to the cleft of his ass, fingers nervously drifting down to graze over – </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy pulls his hand back. Christ was he really doing this? He slams his head against the pillow, aggravated with himself. <em>C’mon man, don’t be a bitch, Billy</em> he growls to himself. <em>Everything was feeling good ‘til you let that shit get to you.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Still hard, Billy takes a shallow breath and reaches back down to rub his fingers over his asshole. It didn’t feel as sensual as the other touches had felt. There was hair and it felt dry, like a place he maybe shouldn’t be touching. He’s about to give up when he grazes it over lightly with the tip of his finger. The sparks returned, igniting his excitement. Okay, he could do this. It was starting to feel really good. But it could use something else.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He looks over and sees the bottle of lotion. He reaches over, pressing the pump to dispense lotion into his palm. Rubbing his hands together quickly, he puts his hands back. He hisses from how cold it is, but hell, it’s gotta be an improvement. Billy gasps from the cool slickness over his hole, rubbing in small circles. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With how good this felt, his mind then wanders into fantasy. What if Steve were to do this? A whimper leaves Billy, biting his lip and writhing in bed a little. God if Harrington were here right now doing this, he’d get a kick out of Billy’s reactions. They way Steve would stare at him would always make Billy’s face burn with embarrassment, which was why he always kept his eyes shut and looked away for extra measure. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>As amazing as this felt, curiosity pushed him further – an idea he once considered but hadn’t been brave until now to find out for himself. Billy takes a deep breath, holding it for a moment as he pushes his finger in slowly. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Scrunching up his face, Billy didn’t know what to make of this. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but the pressure and small stretch was weird. Maybe it would be better to rub it like before, but when he pulls his finger out, the dragging sparked a new, more thrilling, sensation. “Oh shit,” he sighs. He pushes back in and slowly back out repeatedly, and finally he found that edge he needed to help him there.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>But the beauty of fantasies is they push you even <em>farther</em>.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Having blown Harrington earlier, and imagining Steve fingering him, Billy’s fantasy wandered into deeper territory. Because this felt really fucking good, he began to imagine how much better it may feel if he took Steve’s pretty cock where his middle finger pressed deeply inside. Billy pants and bites back his whines as he speeds up, wishing Steve were here.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Fuck!” Billy comes so hard he slams the back of his head against the wall. Billy takes deep breaths through his nose and opens his eyes to watch his hand move mindlessly, milking every drop he can get out onto his stomach. “Holy shit…” he mumbles, slowly pulling his hand away and lying flat on the bed. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Staring at the ceiling, Billy reflects on how fucking incredible that felt. <em>How long have I wanted to do that…why did I wait so long? </em>He wonders. He sighs and shuts his eyes. He had to tell Steve. This was obviously something he was ready for, right? And unlike before, the idea of talking to him about it didn’t scare him as much as his previous advances. But he would have to bring it up carefully. If he pulled a fast one again like he had with the belated birthday blowjob, he may unknowingly put pressure on Steve and might combust.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>By some miracle, they had a few hours to spend together. Billy with his day off, Steve with his day off from Scoops, and Steve’s parents out shopping – the boys had the house to themselves long enough to take their time in taking one another apart to <em>complete</em> satisfaction.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>They lay there on Steve’s bed, panting and covered in come without a care in the world in that moment. “Finally,” Steve says, giving a breathy laugh, “it’s been like, <em>forever</em> since we did that in peace.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, tell me about it,” Billy agrees. “To be honest, lately I’ve had to get myself off like two or three more times,” Billy says, laying against the mound of pillows. When he had come across what measures he needed to take to feel content, deep down somewhere he felt like there was something wrong with him. He was always satisfied with Steve, but he would be so riled up and unable to get another round from him, Billy needed something more to help curb his excitement. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Oh…” Steve says, surprised and not sure how to feel or what to say. “…is… is it not <em>good</em> or <em>enough</em>?” He asks. If he wasn’t giving Billy what he needed, he certainly wanted to fix that. Especially since all they had been doing were quickies – or their version of it at least.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No no, it’s great don’t get me wrong,” Billy assures him, waving his hands holding his lighter and cigarette, “it’s just…y’know, I want <em>more</em>. But I’ve been too chicken shit to ask.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Well that’s dumb,” Steve half scoffs.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Shut up,” Billy mumbles, lighting his cigarette.<br/>
</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“No, I mean – you don’t have worry about asking for more.” Steve elaborates.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>A puff of smoke swirls into the room and Billy goes quiet for a moment, biting his bottom lip in thought, “Yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Of course, Bill. What do you want more of?” Steve asks for him, grabbing the cigarette for himself to take a drag. Getting these sorts of conversations going were Steve’s specialty in earning Billy’s trust to make him feel comfortable in breaching new and unfamiliar conversational territory.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy looks at Steve, studying his face and seeing the sincerity. He takes that bet, “I want to <em>do</em> more…” he says, taking his cigarette back.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve’s cockiness dives and cluelessness sets in with blinks, “I uh…I’m not sure what you mean.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy takes a deep breath, a bit frustrated that Harrington wasn’t picking up his goddamn <em>hint.</em> He had been building up the courage forever to talk to him about what had been in his mind for a while. It was obvious to him he would need to clarify his needs. Pulling another drag, he huffs, “Y’know,” he nudged shyly, “I want…” he exhales, “<em>it</em>.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>For a moment Steve didn’t know what Billy had meant, shaking his head until “<em>it” </em>clicked in his mind, His mouth drops open, “Uhhh,” he says unintelligently. He snaps his jaw shut to clear his throat and readjusts himself, leaning in closer to Billy, “…y-you mean…?” He waves his hand in a vague manner between them.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy nods, biting his lower lip nervously again and flicking the ash into a nearby tray. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh, o-okay! Okay, okay. Y-yeah I mean sure if that’s – if that’s what you want.” Steve tells Billy, desperate not to show just how eager he was that they were going to go all the way now. But then another obstacle crosses his mind he hadn’t considered before climbing on board. He swallows nervously, “Just uh – one question. How do we exactly uh…go about that?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Y’never done anal before Harrington?” Billy questions with a raised brow and teasing grin.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Uh, <em>no</em>. Clearly.” Steve says, then squints, “Wait – have you?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“With girls,” Billy shrugs, “well – <em>girl</em>. But lots of times with her. You can say she taught me how to.” He offers the last bit of the cigarette to Steve, who takes it and reaches over Billy to burn it out.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“…huh,” Steve hums. He definitely did not expect that. “And so…it’s the same for…y’know, guys?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy shrugs, “I guess. I mean, if you apply the same logic, I assume it’s the same for guys too.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Huh.” Steve says again, his mind trying to picture the scenario. “And how do you want to…” he trails off, hoping Billy will pick up what he’s putting down. With a brow cocked, Billy waits for Steve to finish his sentence. Steve clears his throat roughly, “How do you want to…<em>perform</em>?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Are you asking me if I want to fuck you or be fucked by you?” Billy guesses bluntly.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“That’s the one.” Steve points with a slight flinch. The words were somehow crude to his ears. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy laughs, “Stevie baby, I dunno if you’ve noticed but, I rather enjoy being a pillow princess.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“A rather assertive one,” Steve adds. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy leans in, “I gotta be honest with you,” he whispers, “when I said I gotta get off a few more times after we fool around, I got <em>curious,</em> if you will, in what else could make me blow my load. You know what I mean?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve has absolutely no fucking clue what Billy means. Because – how else could Billy get off if they were just now talking about the next steps? “No,” he admits, “care to elaborate?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy rolls his eyes and drops is head back, “You’re <em>killing</em> me, Harrington,” Billy groans, half chuckling. He looks at Steve and licks his lips, “You trust me?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve narrows his brows a bit, “Of course I do,” he mumbles. He watches as Billy takes his hand and places it on his chest, moving it down slowly to his hip and around to his ass. Steve can’t help but smile and gives Billy a squeeze. But when he feels Billy press his fingers in his down and between his ass, Steve’s breath catches. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <em>
    <span>Oh.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“You up for it?” Billy asks him, hoping Steve would say yes.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I…” Steve starts off, not sure how to answer without disappointing Billy, “I don’t know how.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’ll teach you. Don’t worry, I cleaned up back there,”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“What?” Steve said in confusion. Billy hushes him and repositions them both with Steve following.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I’ll tell you later. Focus Harrington,”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Right, sorry. So, what am I doing?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>The great thing about being at Steve’s house, he always had the good fancy shit for them to use to slick up. He retrieved the little bottle beside them and pours some on lubricant on his fingers, “So, you’re just going to rub right here,” he parts his legs and touches his own hole to show him, “go slow, like when you rub a girl’s clit.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>He remembers the girl who first introduced this to him, Casey. He broke it down to Steve the same way she broke it down for him. There was stuff to do to make sure the receiver didn’t get hurt. Even all the nitty gritty stuff just in case another girl was curious about trying, he could “guide her”, as Casey said.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Okay,” Steve nods, looking where Billy was touching himself. Good Christ, he hadn’t imagined what Billy would look like doing this before. But now that he was seeing it, it was <em>really fucking hot</em>. “Then what?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Then you’re gonna push one in slowly, like when you finger a girl, but slower. Okay? Same thing.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve looks back down again and it felt daunting. He’d never done this any of his exes or flings before. Then there was this small voice telling him that this was a “dirty” part of the body. But…he’d done things he never thought he’d ever do. Those things were “dirty” too, but only because he didn’t think he could do them. Since he’s realized a few things, he doesn’t care if they’re abnormal or not, because he was with Billy now, and everything they did was incredible. The guy was giving him a run for his money is who was the hornier one. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve flicks his eyes up at Billy briefly before looking back down and moving Billy’s hand to replace it with his, touching the furl muscle first. He rubbed the pad of his finger up and down, slow and firm like the way Billy told him to. The little shaky breath that leaves Billy excites Steve. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Swallowing the lump in his throat, Steve shuffles up a bit on his knees to hold Billy’s waist in his free hand. There was nothing more Steve loved to watch than Billy coming undone by the slightest kiss or touch by him. He felt the flutter of Billy’s hole and takes it as a sign that he should probably move on now. Right? Should he ask?</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Billy? Baby, should I – “</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah,” Billy interrupts him, knowing what Steve was asking, “go ahead.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Swiping his thumb back and forth over Billy’s hip, Steve nods and gently pushes in. He backs off when he’s met with resistance, but Billy encourages him to keep going, “It’s fine. I’ll tell you if it hurts.” And that means a lot to Steve. He was always checking in on Billy, reminding him to talk to him. This was one of those moments where Billy not only knew what he was worried about, but that he spoke up on it too.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Pressing in again, Steve slips in and, “Wow…that’s um, different,” he says. Seeing the unsure look on Billy’s face Steve stammers to correct himself, “I mean it’s, really warm and – tight.” He clarifies. Much warmer and much tighter than anyone he’s ever touched. He clears his throat, “Um, so I just uh, in and out right?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah,” Billy nods, “go slow.” He reminds him with a gentle touch to his arm. When Steve starts to move, Billy lets out small sighs and moans of pleasure. The friction of the movement rubbing against the rim felt so much better than he could have ever imagined. Steve’s fingers weren’t as thick as his own, but they were longer. “Mn, don’t stop.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I won’t,” Steve answers, watching Billy enjoy himself. He pays attention to his cues and gradually goes faster, deeper, and twists his wrist which earns him a little more reaction. He doesn’t need to ask Billy if he likes it, he familiar with how that sounds. He leans down to kiss him, wanting to get close to him again and devour those helpless moans. Focused on pleasing Billy, he wonders what Billy will feel if he were to crook his finger a bit. When he does, Billy gasps and stiffens up, tearing away from their kiss, “What, did that hurt?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“N-no,” Billy mumbles, “just – what the fuck was that?” He asked out loud.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“I dunno,” Steve answers, “you tell me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy rolls his eyes, not actually wanting an answer, “Nevermind that just, do it again.” When Steve does, Billy arches his back off the bed, “Shit! Mn, that’s – haaa, Christ!” He grunts, trying not to be too loud. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve keeps his finger curled and pumps it in and out carefully, aiming to build him up. He can’t get enough of Billy’s reactions. He licks a broad strip long Billy’s neck, leaving a trail of kisses along it. He smiles against the tan skin when his boyfriend clings onto him with labored breath, “I got you,” he tells him. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy pants and grabs Steve’s face to look at him. “M-maybe put another?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Okay.” Steve doesn’t take his eyes of Billy’s and gently works in a second finger inside with the first. The way Billy’s mouth drops open and brows raise, Steve knows it’s perfectly, if not <em>exactly</em> what he wants. He cradles back of his head and leans in close, “Good?” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy can’t bring himself to speak and simply nods, capturing Steve’s lips to help ground himself from the overwhelming feeling Steve was relentlessly putting him through. He kept rubbing this spot over and over again and, “Ngh!” it was making Billy tear up from how scary good it felt. “I’m haa c-lose,” he manages to say. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve doesn’t let up his ministrations. He thrusts his hand just harder enough to make a faint slapping sound against Billy. He can feel his hand starting to cramp and his forearm begin to burn but fights through it. He sits back to look down and watch, becoming more comfortable by the second of doing this. He squeezes his own member to stave off the now painful ache. Suddenly Billy grabs hold of his forearm, pulling it to keep him from moving, to which Steve registers to just rake his fingers over that spot until he comes.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Teary eyed and on the brink of orgasm, Billy curls his chest half-way up to see Steve’s arm flex as he fingered him and grits his teeth, “Shit!” he hissed, trying his damnedest to keep quiet. Not for the sake of anyone who may walk in the house as overhear, but for the fact that these unfamiliar sounds were being worked out of him so easily, and differently than the ones he’s made before.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>It was always a sight watching Billy come. But to see him react like <em>this</em>, “Jesus,” Steve sighs in awe. He lifts his other hand, dipping his fingers into the mess made all over the rise and fall of sun kissed abs. “…that good huh?” he hums smiling, leaning over to give Billy a rewarding kiss. He could feel him trembling beneath and runs a warm hand up and down his side.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Billy kept his eyes covered with the back of his hand, taking shallow shaky breaths. <em>Fuck that felt good,</em> he couldn’t help but think. Putting his hand down, he sees Steve looking him up and down, looking proud of what he’d done. Looking down further, he sees just how er, <em>excited</em> he still was. Thinking back on his fantasy, he reaches down and grabs Steve’s dick, “Whaddya thinkin’ ‘bout Stevie?” Billy smiles. “Keep looking at me like you wanna jump me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah…you can say that,” Steve mutters. Imagination of what it would feel like being wrapped around in that tight heat lead to temptation but was promptly stopped with restraint…except for this moment Billy was egging him on right now. “Mn, Bill – d-don’t,” he sighs.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Don’t what? <em>This</em>?” Billy twists his hand, earning a low groan from Steve. “Or tease you?” He asks, tugging Steve forward to rub the tip of his weeping cock over his hole. He can tell this is overwhelming for Steve with the way he shuts his eyes and starts sharply breathing through his nose. “Y’know…when I was doing this myself a few days ago, I wondered what this right here,” he squeezes the length, “would feel right here.” He taps it over his loosened entrance. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Jesus fucking Christ Billy, you’re killing me here,” Steve mumbles. He swore he was about to combust. A moan slips out of him when Billy starts to jerk him off seriously.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Would you like that?” Billy croons. “Who am I kidding? I know you would,” he smiles, humming as he scoots closer to further tease the other. The warm weight of Steve’s dick resting there just…<em>felt right</em>. As embarrassing as it is for Steve to let him play with his own dick, Billy enjoys the faint wet sound when he rubs the blunt head firmly against him. “Someone’s wet.” </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Sh-shut up…mmph,“ Steve balls up a fist then unclenches it to rub his face. He’s trying to hard to remain composed. “Billy I – goddamnit Billy, you’re a fucking sadist.” he grounds out. The fact that Billy got off to watching him squirm proved it. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Whatever, you like it,” Billy murmurs, watching as he got him off. He feels the tell twitching in his grip that Steve was close. There was only one spot Billy wanted Steve to unload on him. “C’mon baby, gimme what I want.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Pathetically, that minuscule demand was enough for Steve to give him what he wanted practically on demand. The effort of even trying to last was fuck all. Two short jerky strokes and Steve came with a shout. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>When Steve finally looks down, he sees the mess he made all over Billy’s ass, “Shit,” he pants.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>With an interested half grin, Billy wraps his legs around Steve to pull him in, “Yeah? That good?” He playfully mocks with Steve’s own words from earlier.</span>
  
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Half annoyed, Steve scrunches up one side of his nose, “Oh fuck off,” he says, growing tired as he usually did after they messed around. Billy laughs and pulls him down by the back of his neck for another kiss. They roll around in bed playfully until they finally settle on their sides looking at one another.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Hey uh,” Billy starts to say then clears his throat, “my old man and Susan will be out this weekend for their Anniversary. Max already has the go ahead to sleep over at El’s. Would you uh…wanna come over?” The way Billy invites Steve makes the wheels in his head to turn.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Got something <em>in mind</em>?” Steve questions, wanting to know if his suspicions were correct.  </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“And what if I do?” Billy counters, leaning and nibbling on his bottom lip. “Whaddya say?” he asks against those full lips with a soft peck. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah…yeah alright,” Steve says in a low murmur, smiling against Billy’s lips. Billy didn’t have to <em>say</em> what they would be doing. But going with his gut, Steve had an inkling of what will happen. Throughout their relationship, they had taken their time in exploring each other and discovering what they did and didn’t like. And so much had happened today. They were going to the next step. This was huge. It meant Billy at long last accepted himself in who he is, including his preferences.</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>Steve pulls Billy in close, feeling emotional of what all of this meant not just to him but to Billy too and it would radically change their relationship. “When do you want me to come over?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“They’re leaving Thursday afternoon. So, come over Friday night after work. Max will be at El’s by then.” Billy tells him, playing with a little curly lock of Steve’s hair.  </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah. Yeah okay, I’ll be there.” Steve nods, unable to contain the excitement in his voice. The way Billy smiles at him knowing his excitement and the look he serves him weakens his knees. </span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“It’ll be the time of your life, pretty boy.”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">
  <span>“Yeah, uh huh, sure,” Steve slips his hand under Billy’s hair, cradling the back of his head and sealing another kiss, “you’re a real charmer, y’know that?”</span>
</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span>They get cleaned up together and Steve gets ready for his shift at Family Video. When they walk out of the house to go their separate ways, Billy turns around, walking backwards to is Camaro, “See y’soon, pretty boy.” Billy winks at him as he slinks away into his car. Steve watches Billy abandon him there, left to his imagination of what may happen this weekend. Which isn’t helpful because</span> <span>Steve can’t focus for shit during the entire shift, annoying the fuck out of Keith who fixes his mistakes.</span></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A/N: okay so I think we all know what's going to happen next, meheh. Thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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